


Hall of the Mountain Queens

by ClarenceJ



Series: Adventures of Lena and Clara [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Danger, Drama, Drama & Romance, Dreams and Nightmares, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Modern Girl in Middle Earth, Non-Explicit Sex, Post-Battle of Five Armies, Slow Burn, Swearing, Violence, lots of danger, some ptsd
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-09-25
Packaged: 2019-11-18 07:22:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 71,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18116030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClarenceJ/pseuds/ClarenceJ
Summary: Part two of the story A Long Way from Home that jumps in with Clara and Lena facing all sorts of battles (but not all of them obvious). There are troubles brewing on both fronts as their transition is settled out and becoming acclimated to their new home. They have to deal with the ups and downs of courting (and possibly being married to) those who rule one of the wealthiest, and soon to be, the most powerful kingdom in Middle Earth while still trying to stay true to themselves.





	1. Growing Pains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena and Clara are sent back to school in a sense as they're assigned to the library to read up on their new home. The girls also have to face adversity being the only two women in Erebor and the only two humans in close contact with royals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Hello everyone! Thank you so much for coming back if you're reading this! The chapters coming will be kind of slow since school is coming to a close. Remember that I always enjoy your comments and kudos, so give me some love!!!! Anyway, thanks again for everyone's support for this wonderful adventure, and I have a great shout-out to my own dear Lena!  
> Happy reading!

**Chapter 1**

Lena POV

            The change in temperature is what woke me at first. My personal dwarf oven had left and when he did he let in a gust of cold mountain air. No matter how many days we’ve already been in the mountain, I don’t think that I am ever going to get used to the mix of cold and moist air being blown in from the broken gates and doors.

            “Where you goin’ Fee?” I mumble from my pillows with my hair in a nest around my head and am rewarded with the feeling of his facial hair gliding across my face and the small pecks of kisses trailing from his warm lips. I hear him give a little sigh as he sits back on the soft bed next to me. His kisses create a path to my lips where I gladly accept them on my own in my hazy, sleepy state. This is easily one of my favorite parts of the morning. These soft and warm kisses are placed all over my body to make me shiver and wish for him to come back to bed (and he sometimes does). His hands brush my shoulders as they drag the blanket down slowly revealing the cotton nightdress to his wandering eyes.

            “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on,” he whispers lovingly, dragging his hands along my waist, bunching my nightgown around my hips. I feel my heart start to beat faster and faster while sleep still weights on my eyelids. I grab his hands, eyes still closed, and give a little groan while pushing his hands back down.

            “I’m also a very tired woman,” I grunt with a stern expression. His chuckles tell me I’ve hit my mark. “I didn’t know there were meetings this early,” I change the topic on him. Now it’s his turn to grunt.

            “I have to meet the first group of restorers for the mines and then I will see you later, and if not I will see you tonight,” he whispers tiredly, resting his head on the center of my chest. The pressure is firm but it’s nice and comforting knowing that he’d rather stay with me in bed than go to all of these meetings and events. I gently and tiredly comb through his sandy blonde locks being mindful of the braids so he doesn’t have to re-do them.  

             “You better,” I mumble a little on the threatening side. I give him a nod in ascent to his almost promise and give his arm a little squeeze before tugging the covers back up to my chin as the door quietly closes behind him. I drift in and out of a warm sleep, fitfully tossing and turning under the sheets.

             In the back of my mind, I feel the blankets twisting around my legs, holding me in place, pinning me against the bed and pinning me to myself. The heat is growing around me as red saturates my eyes like a flash from a camera and I look down quickly to find my legs covered in deep red blood being held in deep by muck. My hands lurch out from the mud to claw at my legs and the dirt around me, but the mud is too deep, too thick, to uncover my legs. Nausea builds in my stomach as I lean forward to climb when the sudden sound of whooshing air next to my ear sends me falling backward, like getting hit all over again and being thrown against Kili’s hard chest. The double feeling of lying on my back and the strong chest startles me up in bed clutching the furs tightly and kicking the covers frantically to get my legs free from their restraining fibers. My grip is so tight that my knuckles turn white and start to ache while my breathing begins to even out slowly.

             “Oh my god,” I pant with my hand now to my chest feeling my racing heartbeat. “I’m fine—I’m fine,” I repeat over and over as the sound of the whoosh also repeats itself faintly in my ears. I rub the spot right under my heart and feel the dull ache of the arrow still piercing me. Once my breath completely settles, I drop the covers on my lap and let my muscles relax before commanding them to contract again. _‘Time to get up for the day’_ I think with a small sigh.

              My heart is heavy from the lack of sleep and my stomach feels as if it’s turning sour in my body from the bitter after-effects of adrenaline and the horrible dreams that have been more common as of late, stealing me away in my dreams to shove me back into the battle. _‘As if I need a re-run of that mess’_ I chirp cynically. The nightmares had never bothered me before but they are becoming a nightly occurrence ranging from dreams with Fili dying in front of my eyes or me being in the middle of the battle not being able to run fast enough to get away from the guts and muck. _‘Do I tell Fili?’_ I wonder with a pinched brow, ‘ _I’ll tell him about it later’_ I tell myself tiredly as I shove my brooding thoughts away.

              The dwarves from the Iron Hills have been pouring in the mountain ever since the true winter had come leaving me surrounded by burly, short, and sometimes angry dwarrow as they apparently prefer being called. The weather is another challenge of its own with some flurries occur during the day while the night brings sub-zero temperatures and storms with white lightning in part with the heavy snow. _‘Fili wasn’t joking when he had said feet of snow’_ I think in shock with a shiver that shakes my whole body and makes my hairs stand on edge.

               I climb out of the warm bed to tread on the cold stone, slip on all of my layers today just like I have for the past week or so. The pants that Fili had found me earlier in the season were swapped for leather pants found in the guest quarters for humans while the sharing of tunics with Fili was abandoned due to climate, leaving me with finding my own tunic with fur sewn on the inside to keep me warm while walking the mountain halls.

              The great dining hall is a hum of life even this early in the morning, or at least I think it’s morning. Living in the mountain is one of the more challenging experiences that I've been in before without the real ability to tell time naturally. Everyone else didn’t seem to have a problem with it as though they have some sort of magical internal clock that can feel the sun through the mountain. In a way, it reminds me of the great hall in Hogwarts but without windows.

             The long chamber has a head table for the royal family while there are rows upon rows of long tables for everyone else. The dwarves are constantly bustling, rebuilding, training, or finding some possible way to get an audience with the king or princes. I’m usually left to my own devices during the day since Fili is always stuck in meetings and I don’t know enough so I’m stuck on “learning duty” with Clara, but for now I have to worry about breakfast.

              The kitchens are almost as hot as the forges I saw a few weeks ago as I pry the doors open looking for Bombur, now the leader of the kitchen, to grab a bite of food and then head down to the library. There is a mixture of steam and flour dust in the air from the constant baking of bread, but in all of the chaos, there’s a system. There are different stations for the preparation of certain foods like meat, bread, and vegetables. _‘At least they don’t use the same knife for everything’_ I think to myself gratefully.

              I stand to the side of the kitchen, skirting around the edges to avoid being in the way but is still bumped and nudged around by muscular dwarrow while they swear and curse the “beardless blonde” in khuzdul. I open my mouth to retort but the dwarf is already gone among the sea of them here. The insults that they mutter do hurt me but I try not to let it show as I spot Bombur, with relief, over a large pot stirring with a ladle so large I most likely couldn’t lift it myself.

             He spots me weaving my way through the kitchen and beams a large and friendly smile toward me. “Good morning Lena! On your way to the library as usual?” he asks lightly with a chuckle. The men working next to him suddenly seem very interested in their own work instead of cursing me or sending me dirty looks for interrupting their cooking.

            “Yeah, I’m going to read some more, learn some more, you know how it is,” I trail off with my own smile. “There’s a lot to learn and my brain is only so large,” I force a laugh even though I really hate all of the reading but I know it’s necessary. Bombur joins my chuckle before handing me a bowl of porridge with honey over the top and I accept it with another smile and a nod in thanks. “Thank you Bombur. I’ll let you get back to it so I don’t distract you any longer.” He gives me a grateful nod and turns back to his pot with powerful circles of his arms and the iron ladle.

             The walk to the library is not too long but the view is much different than anywhere else. The doors to the library are from almost floor to the ceiling with large iron bolts holding the ancient planks together and are an intimidating sight to book lovers everywhere. I lean all of my weight on the door allowing it to swing open with more ease than the day before and take in the sight before me; Clara wearing comfy clothes sitting in one of the chairs with a pile of books surrounding her and another mountain of books a little further away. Every table, isle, and section are all surrounded by the easily fifteen-foot tall bookshelves covered with large leather books. It’s as if we’re sitting in a great valley of mountains made of books.

            “There you are!” she calls from her nest of books, looking up with her own tired smile.

             “It looks like you started without me,” I comment with a breath of a smile. I don’t have to worry about putting an exaggerated smile on after every one of my sentences with Clara, which I’m very happy for. There’s no need that I have to pretend I like waking up at dawn or reading ancient khuzdul laws that hurt my head and history for hours on end before moving to another subject to start the process all over again. It’s nice to not worry about saving face with someone at least. I even have to do it with Fili sometimes to not worry him and to not feel like I’m distracting him from his own duties.

             “I asked Thorin last night what we should read about next and he suggested laws,” she utters with a reluctant groan. “I know, I know! I wanted to get here early and pick out the so called easy books and scrolls that Balin suggested too.” Her tone has a bit of annoyance to it and I raise my eyebrows questioningly at her tone, and she flops her arms in response. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate the help from them but this isn’t my forte! I work with animals not with books and constant reading and cramming of information.”

             She looks around the room conspiratorially before looking back at me with her eyebrows raised and her eyes wide. “They follow Thorin everywhere. I mean everywhere! Dwalin and Balin are with him like every step that he takes and every meeting and sometimes even lunch with me. It’s me and my lover as well as his guard and advisor!” she whispers tersely and I scoff playfully back.

             “I can understand that. I don’t think any of them are going to slow down until Erebor is running perfectly again the way they remember it,” I suggest. “I wonder what they really remember or if it will take another hundred years to get it going like they remember. At that point we’ll be dead and it will probably still smell like dragon.” The air has a certain scent to it of hot metal, dust, and the undeniable smell of an animal in one place for too long.

             “What do you want to read about first? Jail sentencing, or execution and exile crimes?” Clara offers with a tight-lipped expression and a book in each hand.

             “I’ll take execution and exile for five-hundred if you would,” I retort and she smirks. The runes on the inside of the dusty old book make my head hurt almost as soon as I open it, making me grimace. It’s like the letters go in through my eyes with icepicks, take a few sections to get translated, and then turn into words that finally make sense. It’s almost as if my brain vehemently doesn’t want to read in runes and characters. Besides all of the runes, the fact that it’s really a law book (a very old law book too) and not something like a storybook makes it even tougher to read. It’s like trying to read a textbook all day and retain everything because you might have to fall back on it in the future.

            “So get this,” I start after reading for a bit, “that for execution there’s a real executioner.” I’m stunned a bit at this revelation as if I never expected that would be someone’s job. Back home it’s like living in prison but here they just chop your head off or send you away.

            “Wait, Thorin or whoever the king is wouldn’t do it? Really?” She sounds shocked and I take the time to read over it once more before nodding my head to confirm what I said before.

            “Yeah like the whole black hood, big ax, and everything. Well I mean maybe not an actual black hood but I’m pretty sure it would be the captain of the guard,” I mutter connecting the dots looking at her with wide eyes. “That would mean Dwalin would do it.” Silence is the only sound for a few moments before Clara nods her head.

            “I guess it makes sense but isn’t he also the inquisitor and the captain of the guard too?” She smiles a little and then shakes her head. “There are a lot of roles that people have to do around here besides what they’re already assigned to,” she explains her thoughts and I nod back.

            “Fili and Thorin are basically in charge of everything, or at least they have to point people in the right direction.” I think about how little I see of Fili now and wonder if Clara sees Thorin even less. “How often do you see Thorin now that they’re all working?” I ask.

            Clara tilts her head back and forth thinking. “I would say maybe just in the morning and at night. Lately, he leaves before I’m awake and tries not to wake me up, so that means I only see him at night if Balin doesn’t have him filling out mountains of paperwork,” she says as she closes her large book and turns towards me. “It sucks a little but I don’t say anything because I know it’s stressful for him and he’s doing the best he can. They all are,” she shrugs.

            I take a second to silently agree then I remember the nightmares. It’s like the silence grows larger and larger until it’s filling the entire library before I work up the nerve to tell her. “I’ve been having nightmares,” I say so quietly I almost hope she didn’t hear and I could forget about it until tonight.

            She looks up from her book and crosses her legs on her seat. “Yeah?” she prompts me to continue. I shift around in my seat now that I've gotten this started.

            “I dream that I’m back out there and I’m stuck in place and then when I’m finally about to be free I’m shot and wake up in bed,” I explain. “It’s like I can still feel them sometimes. The arrows. It’s like they’re stuck in me.” I say more to myself than to her, but now that I’m talking about my thoughts it’s like I can’t stop. It's word vomit. “I know I should tell Fili but he’s so busy and the last thing I want is to be a burden and have him worry about me or feel that he has to abandon his own responsibilities, or even worse have them all think less about me,” I pour out while Clara sits and listens. “We died.” The bluntness of the statement still shakes me to my core. The very end of my life with what feels like nothing on the other side.

            “Yeah, we did.” The sadness and acceptance in her voice tell me that she feels the same way that I do.

            “Do you dream about it?” I ask quietly. I look at her only to find her playing and distracting herself with her nails.

            “I,” she stops and sighs heavily, “I don’t dream about it right now but I worry about it sometimes. It’s like one minute I’m fine and the next I feel like I could crawl out of my skin, burst into tears and I have to have Thorin near me,” she stresses that last part. “I think I can manage on my own just fine though. I just feel like a punching bag lately. Like we get hit with all of these big surprises, and even though I know they don’t expect us to be fine, I feel like there’s this pressure to be okay like before after everything we’ve been through. Like 'oh no one is severely injured so it doesn't matter anymore!'”

             Her words sink in slowly like feet in wet sand and I realize that she’s right. They all have their homes back and have their own niche where they’re thriving whereas we’re just treading water for who knows how long, and I wonder when we’re not going to be able to go on.

            “Have you tried keeping a journal or something?” she asks quietly. “That could help you work through the dreams and then you may not have them,” she suggests and I nod my head in acknowledgment. “You don’t even have to write consistently. You can just write when you want to work through something or whenever you want. You could keep it up in the room if you want to.”

             I nod my head even though doubt hangs around in my chest. “That could help. I’ll give it a try.” Silence lapses in between us again and I open the book to continue reading.

_A FEW HOURS LATER_

           “Aren’t you supposed to be reading?” A soft voice asks in the silence making me turn to see who it is and find Fili leaning against a bookshelf looking like some type of renaissance festival model for leather and furs with his blonde hair draping over his shoulders. He looks innocent up until the moment I meet his eyes. His blue eyes are smoldering underneath the surface and could set me on fire without a second thought. There’s obvious want in them and it distracts me from his question as my own desire begins to rise.

            “W-w-what did you say just now?” I stutter a little trying to remember what his question was but I keep getting distracted by the smile that creeps up his face. Those perfect teeth framed by perfectly kissable lips, and facial hair that is truly impeccable. He walks his way up to the comfy chair I’m in to lean on the side of that as well and flash me a full, knowing smile of what he's doing.

            “Aren’t you supposed to be reading instead dozing off?” he jokes lightly. I give him a dry laugh and a mock glare that only makes the playful grin on his face grow wider while my want matches that.  _'I know that look'_ something deep in my mind hints but I brush it off for another time.  _'He wouldn't. Not here'_ I tell myself as I think of how to answer his question.

            “I was reading for hours earlier and all of that reading about executions and exiles has made me a bit bitter,” I explain with a nod toward the large volume on the table. He leans over me, creating a curtain of hair around us, to give me a deep kiss that skips right past gentle and teasing, leaving me wanting more from him and judging from his look he knows just what he’s done. He tugs me up to stand and then pins me to a bookshelf with his crazy dwarf strength. _'Damn_.' I shiver in his hands.

            “When is Clara due back?” he asks nuzzling the spot right behind my ear before sucking lightly and dragging his hands along my butt. The air seems harder to breathe the longer he continues but there’s something in the back of my mind telling me not to jump him here. Not in the library where being caught would be very easy. He gives me a rough squeeze to get my attention back.

            “Um,” I worry my lip and look down at him with pleading eyes, begging him to do something or maybe nothing, yet he moves his hands up my tunic to rub at my bare back. “She went to see if Thorin was free for lunch. . .” I trail off and close my eyes as he leans back in and sucks just a bit harder making me pant at the new sensation. My mouth parts and my breath comes in deep gasps as he teases the hem of my pants.

             I don't even have to see his face to know he's wearing a smirk proudly. “Then we have plenty of time love,” he purrs before coming forward to slowly press every inch of his body to mine, every inch of my body stuck against his and pinned between the bookshelf. “We have all the time in the world for this,” he whispers before pressing his lips to mine and guiding my arms to hang over his shoulders and one leg to his hips.

            His body rocks smoothly against mine sending my blood boiling and my body moving back against his. My tongue is pushed against his in a swirling dance, ready to continue until I’m faint but that's not what he wants. He pulls away from my lips long enough to tug me into a small alcove sending both of us suddenly into the dark of the library.

             My eyesight is still just as bad as when we were in Mirkwood which reminds me that Fili can still see me clearly while he starts to pry at my tunic, ripping at the buttons that don’t seem to want to come undone. He grunts in frustration before he simply takes both sides of my sweater in either hand and releases a small grunt as he rips it straight down sending the buttons flying every which way with small clinks, pings, and rolling stutters

             My heart stops for a moment before beating double time out of my chest. “Fili!” I exclaim in both shock and surprise moving forward to get off of the cold wall and to push him back a little. My chest is revealed to the cold and I give one large shiver as my skin prickles. “I don’t have anything else to wear-,” I try to tell him but he pushes me back and kisses me breathless again while his hands roam over my free torso causing moans to slip out. My hands wind in his hair and tug sharply, almost as a way to get back at him for ripping my sweater. This time I’m not nearly as worried about the state of his braids as I grip him and tug him closer to me.

             “Hush love,” he grins against my lips before descending on my revealed breasts and then placing his mouth against the skin as his hands begin working on the ties of my new pants. My heart pounds wildly in my chest while my head starts to feel light. He pushes down roughly on the leather until they fall far enough down to where he doesn't have to stop his first task. _‘Oh we are so going to get caught’_ I tell myself with a huff and a moan.  

_A WHILE LATER_

             “Fili, I’m going to have to get dressed somehow and you seem to have ripped all of my buttons out!” I argue with him while holding his own tunic against my chest and looking around the library. The doors opened a few minutes ago but there hasn’t been a voice or anyone that I would recognize so now I’m huddling against the bookshelf with the rest of our clothes on the ground while Fili has a stupid smirk on his face, looking like he doesn't have a care in the world.

             “You have to admit this is a little funny love,” he smiles and I try to frown at him, I really do, but he flashes me his cocky smile and I can’t help but give him the same look back. “And it’s only the buttons that were damaged. Your tunic is fine to wrap around you. Surely it’s well enough to last you until we get back to our chambers,” he smirks with a saucy wink and a pat against my butt. I try to swat his hands away but he sneaks a quick kiss as he continues to grope me. He takes the edges of my tunic and holds them over each other and gives me a look that says 'I told you so'.

             “Fine then,” I mutter under my breath standing up from the clothes and slipping my own back on. “Let’s at least try to sneak out of here before anyone can see us cuddling on the floor.” I get dressed, walk out of the isle of books with Fili behind me putting on his clothes and tying his pants and what I see makes me blush from my head to my toes. Sweet, gentle, young Ori is standing there with his mouth gaping and his own matching blush spread across his face. His eyes meet mine before he lets out a squeak.

             “I-I-I’m s-so-,” he stutters with his mouth agape before whipping around with his arms crossed over his chest still clutching the books, “I didn’t see anything miss Lena!” he practically yells out.

             I turn to look at Fili with my shock but he smirks as he adjusts the last part of his shirt and winks at me. “Ori it’s perfectly alright!” he laughs with a smile and the blushing scribe turns around to only look at the floor rather than the two lovers emerging from the books. I give him a sharp elbow as I stand there slightly frozen with embarrassment. “We were simply enjoying the pleasure of the library,” he amends with emphasis on pleasure and I flash him a wicked glare before I give up my fight.

           “It’s fine Ori,” I sigh tiredly. “I have to get back to reading anyway so some decent company wouldn’t be frowned upon,” I tell him giving Fili’s offended face another pointed look and a pointed finger. “You, on the other hand, I will see you later and not in the fun way you’re thinking of,” I lower my voice at the end to nearly growl at him. His eyes practically glow with the thought of a later before he shakes his head and smiles.

           “I’ll look forward ‘to later’ very much. Have fun reading about. . .” he trails off in a question and I heave another sigh.

           “Sentencing and laws,” I explain. He nods his head and with one last peck on the lips, he struts out of the library leaving me alone once again with the books and ghosts of long-dead librarians.

           “Again I am so sorry Lena,” Ori offers up and I shake my head dismissively.

           “You had no idea so it’s fine. There’s no reason to be embarrassed,” I assure him even though I’m a bit embarrassed myself and almost wonder what he heard from our tryst. “Have you had lunch yet?” He shakes his head no. “Would you like to have lunch with me?” He’s hesitant for a moment before shaking his head with a sorry expression.

           “I cannot, I’m sorry. Balin sent me to put away these volumes of the mines and to look for more, and then after that, I’m to catalog more of the books here.” My heart falls at hearing that but I try not to let him see that.

           “That sounds great. Well, then I’ll let you get to it,” I assure him. He nods and turns back to his books leaving me alone with my thoughts. _‘I wonder what I’m going to do now.’_  I decide to leave the library and head back up to the room to change or at the very least sew the buttons back on. The room isn’t too cold when I come in because there are bits of embers in the fireplace that I feed with another log of wood until the flames start to take hold of it and burn brightly. I decide not to change into another sweater but just go with another thicker tunic with a few more layers of leathers and a plain corset. I finally get the last layer before there is a knock at the door.

           “Come in!” I call and the door gently opens to reveal a tired looking Balin carrying a mountain of paperwork along with him and he looks very relieved to see me.

           “Just who I was looking for,” he pants while flashing me a tense smile. “The king-,” he stops himself for a second, “Thorin would like to see you and Clara in the meeting room along with Dwalin.”

           “May I ask why?” I wonder cautiously. Something flashes across his face but he covers it before I fully see the expression. Whenever Dwalin is involved there is usually something that's wrong or at least serious and Balin doesn't usually do summons.  _'Something is not right.'_  

           “Let us wait for Thorin and my strong headed brother to tell you about that,” he hints and yet doesn’t say anything of substance as he continues to avoid my question. He starts to walk out of the room, probably expecting me to follow him but I put a hand on his should that causes him to halt.

           My brow knits and I know that I must look worried. “Balin, what’s wrong?” He takes a pause and then smiles around the edges of his mouth but it doesn't reach his eyes.  _'Definitely wrong'_ I tell myself.

           “I should call you strong headed as well,” he jokes and then puts his tough hand over mine before continuing, “There is nothing wrong dearie just making sure that you stay both stay safe while you’re here.” _'Lie.'_  I rack my brain trying to think of anything that could mean anything like that but nothing comes back. “Let’s meet them and they will explain everything, I promise.” He touches my shoulder and tugs me along a little although his grip is surprisingly tough.

           “Alright then. I wouldn’t want to keep them waiting if they are,” I tell him with shrug of my shoulders. I have a feeling this is more than just wanting to keep us safe in Erebor this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coat for Lena  
> https://goo.gl/images/b99yUj
> 
> Library based off of Hogwarts (A bit)  
> https://goo.gl/images/7EQAH2


	2. Watch Your Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clara finds herself in more trouble than she bargained for today, while there become more and more pressing issues in Erebor that can't be ignored. The girls realize there is more to this kingdom than they would have ever thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> I decided not to post on Friday because I finished early, but I hope that you've enjoyed it so far because it's going to get more adventurous the longer it goes on! I really enjoy writing for everyone who reads it and just remember that I love your comments and ideas as well!  
> Thanks again and enjoy!

**Chapter 2**

Clara POV

            I open my eyes to a dark room and roll over to curl up next to Thorin but I find the other side empty and cold. “Thorin?” I ask into the open air but there’s no reply except the light crackle of the fire. _‘As usual’_ I think as my heart sinks in my chest. “Time to get ready for the day,” I mumble to myself in the dark. The room is slightly cold but there is a faint glow from the fireplace. I shiver a little as I tread over to it to feed the embers and stand there until the soft light fills the room.

            My heart is heavy as I look back to the bed with an emptiness that floods my stomach. “I wish you would stay in bed with me until the morning,” I whisper sadly to myself as I slip on the pants and a binder then a tunic over it. I decide not to wear a heavy coat because I actually enjoy the cold weather. With all of the reading and studying to be done it’s better to wear comfy clothes than a stuffy corset and dress. Erebor is running on low supplies like materials and goods without the flow of trade from others due to the winter weather. It’s non-stop snow with loud storms and mountain shaking thunder. It’s like no weather I’ve ever seen in my life but it’s beautiful in its intensity.

            The halls are quiet as I take my time walking to the library. It must be very early in the morning to explain the silence even of the guards standing outside of the doors. Although Thorin cleared up the confusion of us living here in the royal wing, there is still some tension that I feel coming from the guards and some of the other dwarves from the Iron Hills. They give odd looks toward me when I walk past them and if I get too close I hear them call me “beardless” or “foolish human”. It’s not so much hurtful as it is irritating and, if anything, it’s an annoyance knowing what they say.

            The books aren’t going to pull themselves out of the shelf so I set to it trying to read the worn runes on the sides of the spines and climb the rickety ladders to scan the upper shelves for law books before Lena gets here. It’s eerily quiet in the library since the only person in it is me but every other sound makes me jump and turn my head towards it. I don’t take a lot of time to get the books because if do then I’m going to be here later than I want and not be able to see Thorin when he comes back to the rooms.

            Lena comes in a little later to read and I’m not surprised by her admission of having nightmares. After the first weeks of the battle, I could barely look at a sword without wanting to throw up and run screaming. The worst is when I would be surprised because I would bring people running with my screams. The first few nights of sleeping with Thorin made my heart beat out of my chest with the paralyzing fear of waking up next to someone in, what at first is, an unfamiliar place. My own nightmares have settled down since then but there are still times that I get stuck in my head and the elf’s face flashes in front of my eyes before he’s gutted over and over again like an animal, all playing on repeat.

            “I’m going to see if Thorin can see me for lunch. I think today is one of his more free days without Balin or Dwalin following him around,” I tell her and she looks up for a second before nodding her head once and going back to her law book.

            “Have fun and be safe,” she bids and I smile at how familiar that sounds.

            “You too!” I step out into the great green halls and it’s like an ant farm with how crowded it is with soldiers and lords bustling about with their papers, all focusing on completing their task for the king in hopes of recognition. _‘I want some attention too’_ I think bitterly but stop myself. _‘They’re rebuilding their home. It’s okay that they’re busy’_ I repeat my party line over to myself before sighing. I head up to the meeting room only to find it empty. _‘Strange he should be here’_ I think. I slowly open the doors to the throne room only to find it also strangely empty but it still takes my breath away every time I come in.

            The movies had it right with the large statues and the walkways but what they had wrong was how many throne rooms there were. The one on the walkway, I learned, is to receive guests whereas this one is to hold court and council. The walls seem like they’ll span the whole height of the mountain with columns lining the side as large as redwood trees with geometric patterns that stretch all the way to the top, and as the grand pièce de résistance there is a throne at the head of the chamber inlaid with gold veins and geometric patterns. I remember how small I am in such a large mountain.

            I move on to the next place I can think of, and to my extreme discomfort, it’s the training grounds. I may not have nightmares every night but my own nightmares stem from the everyday carrying of weapons. The sound of clanging metal from the battle will ring in my ears for the rest of my life while the smell of it permeates my nose as the grunts and cries of dwarves makes my stomach clench painfully. All it reminds me of is getting stabbed over and over again. Standing down the hallway from the grounds makes me sick.

            “What are you doin’ here Clara?” a voice speaks up quietly but firmly from behind me, making me startle out of my trance to look at Nori. He’s leaning against the wall with a knowing look on his face. _‘He knows I can’t go in’_ I realize.

            “Looking for Thorin,” I answer cautiously before a light bulb pops up in my head. “You weren’t following me by chance were you?” He raises his eyebrows as if he’s offended at my question. _‘Yeah right.’_

            “Of course I would never think of following a lady such as yourself,” he smiles and I return it, “but you should know that even in this short time the walls may have already grown ears and eyes,” he hints and my smile drops as I take in his meaning and the sound of ringing swords in the distance.

            “Then I’m very glad I have yours for the time you’re willing to give them,” I tell him quietly and he nods.

            He hangs his thumbs in his belt, motioning to the doors down the hall with his head and shifts his feet a bit. “Were you planning on going in some time today?” he jokes but his eyes tell me that he’s still gathering information from my odd behavior. I nod and smile but inside my mouth goes dry, my tongue is heavy, and my limbs prickle with cold.

            A suffocating sensation creeps up into my chest as I force my feet forward and I try to control my shaking hands as I open the door. The sound of fighting increases tenfold and if Nori weren’t at my back I would have turned around and run back to the end of the hall without another thought.

            My stomach curls as I watch the dwarves lunge and slash at each other mercilessly as though still in battle and the air gets hotter and harder to breathe. I try to scan the arena for Thorin as quickly as possible but with every new ring and clash my attention is shattered and scattered from my task. My mouth turns down in a sharp frown as a small whimper comes out of my mouth and my lungs refuse to inflate.

            “What is it?” Nori asks from beside me. I open my mouth to speak except my chest tightens not allowing me to get any sounds out. There are too many sounds coming at me from all directions, there is too much light coming into my eyes in the high ceilinged arena, and there isn’t enough air left in my lungs.

            “Clara?” Nori calls out slightly more alarmed than before and instead of trying to speak I retreat to the door, dragging Nori along with me by clawing at his jacket without a second thought. I try leaning against the wall for support and putting my head close to my knees but the floor feels as though it’s moving under my feet like waves and my chest is tremoring like a thunderclap has struck me.

            “Clara?” I hear Thorin’s voice and it’s as refreshing as a breath of spring air or a glass of cool water on a hot day. The tightening in my chest lessens as he places one of his hands on my hip and the other on my shoulder and presses me gently against the wall. “What is it?” he asks lowly. It’s as if a rubber band that has been pulled taught has snapped back to its original shape, and for me, state of mind snaps back to reality in an instant.

            I raise my eyes from the floor to find his brow knit, mouth parted, and eyes worried. There is a hole in my chest from the panic leaving, leaving only confusion in its wake. “I’m so sorry,” I apologize but I’m not sure what for and even he looks taken aback at my unwarranted apology. “I mean I don’t think it was anything. I’m not sure,” I tell him with a knit brow and shake my head a bit.  He looks wholly and wildly unconvinced at my explanation but with the eyes of him, Nori, and Dwalin on me I don’t want to admit what happened to all of them at the same time. “I-I-I’m fine. Really, I am.” I smile but I don’t feel it reach my eyes.

            “No, you aren’t, love. That was not 'nothing',” he tries to convince me lowly. His grip is light but his words are hard. I open my mouth to protest but Dwalin interrupts with an annoyed huff as he shakes his head in disbelief.

           “If you try tellin’ me that was nothin’ then I best teach you to lie better,” he grunts and I blush in embarrassment and a bit in shame. Thorin must see that I’m uncomfortable with their eyes on me and that I won’t tell him what happened while they’re here, so I see the moment he hardens his features.

            “Leave us,” he commands sharply and turns to them with a side nod. They both give small bows before leaving the two of us alone. “You’re shaking,” he says suddenly and I look at my hands that are trembling like leaves. My mouth opens in a moment of overwhelmed second-hand panic when an unsure sound comes out. It’s like a burst of all emotion expelling from my chest in a single second.

            “I’m-I-I-I was looking for you to see if you were free for lunch but I found you here,” I stammer out and feel the tremors begin to shake the rest of my body. _‘Absence of adrenaline’_ I figure. “I’m going to sit down now,” I say suddenly and lean against the wall as my legs give out shakily. Panic flashes across his face as his grip tightens impossibly on my upper arm while he tries to hold me up, but I shake my head to deter him. “Please give me a second and I’ll be fine Thorin.”

            “Do you need me to get Oin?” His breath tickles my face and I shake my head. “Let us go back to the room for you to rest.” _‘I would love to.’_ It takes another minute of sitting to finally get the strength to stand while holding his hand.

            We make it back to our room where I plop onto one of the couches while Thorin has his stern face on. My stomach is turning and my head is spinning a little with my remaining tension. “It was the sound,” I tell him quietly, knowing that he must be curious, and mildly frustrated, but doesn’t want to ask. He turns his head at that, his eyes widening marginally.

            “The sound of the training grounds?” he clarifies. I nod. He closes his eyes and sighs heavily before running his hands over his face and beard.

            I sigh as the empty feeling washes over me again. _'I'm a failure to him'_ I think sadly. “I didn’t want to worry you! I didn’t know it was going to be that bad, and it just. . . came over me all the sudden. I don’t know what came over me, I mean I do, but it hasn’t been that bad in a few weeks,” I explain to him in a rush and he nods his head in understanding at first but then pauses and snaps his head toward me with wide worried eyes.

            “This has happened before?” he sounds appalled at the thought I would keep this from him and I realize my slip up. I’ve never seen him this shocked before with his eyebrows to his hairline and his eyes wide as saucers.

            “Yeah.” My voice cracks and I cover my face out of shame. “I’m sorry about that too! This has been happening for a few weeks now. Ever since I got settled really, and I thought I was fine but it turned out I was wrong and I didn’t want to worry you because you’re so busy and I just. . . I’m sorry Thorin,” I rush out unhappily. When I look back to his face I watch as it falls through phases of unhappiness, disagreement, and then finally acceptance.

             He sighs heavily once again. “I understand love, I understand. You have nightmares as well,” he says without a question. There’s some hesitation in his voice but it trails down at the end like he already knows the answer to his question. _‘He must see this reaction all the time’_ I think.

            “I used to but now it’s the sound of-,” I pause for a second before giving a short empty laugh and covering my face partly in shame again, “metal. It’s the sound of fighting and swords, and I know that that’s such shit luck for me because everyone here has a sword and everyone knows how to fight so I-I-I-,” I ramble brokenly and he tugs me into a gentle hug that is warm and pure and comforting beyond belief. “I don’t know what to do.” It feels like my heart breaks apart in my chest as my eyes burn fiercely.

            “Hush. Be still, Clara,” he soothes with a hand wrapping around my hip. “It is very common to have battle fatigue after what you have gone through. There is no shame in it. None. It happens to all of us at one point or another, and there is no reason to act so ashamed for scars that you bear, and without complaint might I add.” He looks to me for signs of understandings and continues on. “Clara, you took a sword through your chest! There is no one stronger I know of who would be the same after that. No one.”

            I feel a rush of shame at my next thought. “But I feel like everyone expects that,” my voice cracks again. I break out of his hug with a stubborn jerk to pace around the room and express my earlier thoughts from my conversation with Lena. “They-you-everyone expects us to be alright but we aren’t! I'm not," I whisper brokenly.

           "I feel like I’m never going to be alright and that I’m somehow a disappointment to everyone, so I feel just as disappointed with myself. One minute I'm fine and the next I'm furious and then I can't feel anything! It’s frustrating to not know how a kingdom works and especially to know that others don’t nearly respect me enough because I don’t have a beard! A beard of all things!” I cry out into the quiet room.

            Thorin stands there quietly and calmly listening to me vent. I stammer for a moment, not knowing what else to add to my little speech but Thorin holds up his hand to pause me. His blue eyes are soft and thoughtful as he cautiously approaches me with both hands raised.

            “Let me address all of your worries,” he rumbles gently. “Firstly," he starts as he puts his body against mine, "I do not expect you to somehow know of the inner workings of a kingdom when you have no such system in your world. It can be very frustrating and contradicting work even for me,” he assures me with a slight smirk.

            “Secondly, the others will eventually learn to respect you as they themselves begin to understand your position, and Lena’s, inside of the company and how you both saved my lineage. Lastly, I know I do not say this aloud often, but it is undeniable to require the help of others. I wholeheartedly do not expect you to be who you once were before this adventure began but you must heal eventually. Take your time with yourself and you will, eventually, find ways to cope with the memories of the battle. These thoughts will not plague you forever.”

            I don’t respond right away. I take my time to let each one of his assurances sink in and let each well aimed statements crumble my doubts while tears begin to prickle at my eyes. _‘Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry!’_

            “I know,” I whisper brokenly. I blink back the tears as Thorin wraps me in another firm hug letting me feel loved beyond compare and that all of my fears of being a disappointment to him are, all indeed, false. I rest my cheek against the top of his well braided hair and revel in being with him, even for this moment before we have to continue on. “You promise?” His chest shakes with his little rumbles of laughter at my delayed question.

            “I promise you,” he assures me before pulling back to rest his forehead against mine. “Come, we should continue along with our day before it is over.” He tugs me along to the door where he pauses for a moment to pull me down in a brief kiss that’s both an apology for the lack of time between us and an assurance that he will continue to be my rock when I feel as though I’m drifting away from myself.

            “There you are my king,” Balin greets from the other side of the doorway. As always, he carries an armful of paperwork, a belt full of ink pots, and another pocketful of quills to write with. _‘Ever the scholar’_ I smirk. “Hello Clara,” he greets and I nod in acknowledgment. “I have more council papers for you to sign and afterward the council is to reconvene to discuss the coming spring agreements,” he lists off and Thorin looks tired already.

             “If you need a break from the paperwork I'll be in the library,” I tell him with a kiss on the crown of his head and a squeeze of his hand. I flash him a soft smile before leaving the two dwarves to their business. The walk back to the place doubling as a sanctuary and a prison is a quiet one. The halls I choose to walk down are almost considered a back way, pretty far from the main halls, but it’s where the most peace can be found among the bustling and ringing noises of a mountain of dwarves. I walk down quietly, trying not to let my boots make much noise, letting myself bask in the silence until I hear something that makes my heart skip a beat. Another pair of footsteps. 

              I continue walking for another few seconds to make sure they aren't my footsteps or the swishing of my clothes, and the moment that I’m sure I whirl around to see a short figure wearing a long cloak already holding a gleaming blade in the dim light. A small part of my brain whispers in my ear, like a person sitting on my shoulder, _‘run’_ it whispers hoarsely _. ‘Not again. I can’t do this again.’_ My head spins violently at the spike of fear rushing through my veins. I take one step back but the figure takes a mirroring step, slowly advancing on me as I stand there paralyzed.

              I turn on the spot with my breath catching in my throat before I take off running as fast as I can to find help or to find a weapon of my own. The panic nearly overwhelms me as I realize I’m going to have to run for my life for the first time, and I push my legs as hard as I can before there is a hard blow to my back that makes my breath stutter. The blow to my shoulder knocks me off my feet sending me flying when my head strikes the wall with a solid hit sending my head at an angle and my body close to the wall. My head swims with radiating pain from the collision with the hard stone but the sense of urgency is driving me.

               I roll over fast enough to see the hooded man catch up behind me and stand over me, adjusting his grip on the handle of the dagger ready to drive it into me. A scream bursts into my throat at the sight of the figure towering over me but dies suddenly as something even worse happens; the figure’s head is wrenched up and over while a lone, sickening crack resounds in the hallway.

              My mouth is open wide in horror. I gasp sharply as my mouth contorts in an expression of shock and I feel sick. At that moment, I realize he’s dead and I’ve never shaken so hard in my life. It reminds me of the elf being gutted and falling into the dark mud. The assassin crumbles to the ground like a puppet cut from its strings, his head twisted at an obscene angle, leaving me face to face with the other offender: Nori.

              His face is completely opposite of how I’ve seen him before. He’s always snarky, has a smirk, or is looking for something to nick but now he’s darker like black smoke in the wind. A shadow. “Can’t explain, we’re leaving now,” he says tersely as he grabs my arm in a death grip, forcing me to stand even though I pull away out of instinct and forcing me to follow him out of the slightly narrow hall back into the busy light halls.

              I don’t speak because I don’t know what to say. _‘He just killed someone.’_ The thought rings in my head as do my ears as my brain feels packed with fuzz. “Summon the king to the meeting chambers along with the captain of the guard. Now,” he commands a guard posted in one of the hallways and drags me off.

              “Nori?” I whisper but he doesn’t answer but continues walking at a breakneck pace, no pun intended. His face is completely flat, devoid of emotion, and cold. My head aches fiercely on one side and it hurts to try to watch where I'm walking or to blink. I remain silent for the rest of the walk until I blink and am suddenly thrust into a chair. _‘When did we get here?’_ I wonder briefly. Hands prod at the side of my head so gently I nearly forget who's with me. “Ow,” I hiss and jerk away from him.

              “Calm yourself. You hit your head but it should be fine,” he informs me quietly as he kneels down to be at eye level with me. The difference between him now and a few minutes ago is night and day. He stares at me, watching me for what I might do next.

              I can hardly come up with words. “Thank you. Thank you for saving me,” tell him gratefully and I really do mean it. I don’t think I could take another blade through the chest, physically or mentally.

             The door bursts open as Thorin takes in the scene of Nori kneeling by my side while I’m basically unresponsive. “What is this Nori?” Thorin’s voice booms in the chamber as he’s followed closely by Dwalin. It’s like thunder rolling low on the sky about to warn the ground of lighting creeping within the clouds.

            “Someone came after Clara with the intent to kill and dispose of her,” he says and the statement hangs in the air. The finality of it rings in my ears like Lena’s statement earlier. _‘We were dead.’_

            “Are they disposed of?” Dwalin asks and Nori nods. Their expressions are also emotionless as they talk about this dwarf as though he were no more than an animal or an orc.

            I realize with a cold thought that I might not be the only one. “Lena,” I whisper and their heads turn to me. _‘How could I be so stupid!’_

            “Cla-,” Dwalin starts but I lock eyes and mine are burning.

            “Get. Lena.” The punctuation of my order is clear as day but no one moves. “She is alone in the library and I’m probably not the only target. Find her,” I mutter at the end, my statements losing their bite the further on I speak. Nori nods and immediately leaves to find my friend. My best friend. I remain seated as all of the fight leaves my body. My torso slouches against the chair back while my head throbs and back aches slightly.

            “Are you unharmed?” Thorin worries and I nod my head. All of my energy is zapped. He cups the back on my head delicately as he kisses my forehead before pulling me close to him. I close my eyes as I take in everything about the embrace: the warmth, the smell of oils and tobacco weaving in the fibers of his coat, the way his hands grip me possessively.

            “Clara, what happened exactly?” Dwalin asks with a straight face and I never want to be on the wrong end of that look again. I feel like a suspect being interrogated by the police with him looking at me like that. “Don’t leave any details out. Tell us everything.”

            "Do I have to?" I whisper brokenly to them and there's a brief flash of pity in their eyes but all I receive in return is a solid nod from Dwalin. I nod back and after a moment to collect my thoughts I tell them everything from the footsteps to running away and finally his death. Thorin looks as worried as Dwalin does by the end.

            “They should be assigned guards from this point on,” Thorin speaks up and Dwalin nods a millisecond after he’s done. _‘Like bodyguards?’_ I wonder but don’t ask. I feel like a limp noddle just sitting there while my brain plays catch up along with my emotions.

            “I have a few in mind for them,” Dwalin offers and Thorin nods at his preparedness.

            The next few minutes pass in tense silence before the door opens with an empty handed Nori. He whispers something to Dwalin that I can’t hear but Dwalin nods his head in return. I walk over to the fireplace and stand in front of the warmth for a moment with my back to the others. Nori’s face flashes in the front of my mind. Him standing over the dead dwarf with an emotionless face makes me wonder what else he’s done. I trust him, just like I trust every other member of the company, but it does make me wonder what else he’s done that others don’t know of.

             The next time the door opens it’s Balin followed by Lena. Relief floods my chest seeing that she’s okay, confused at what we’re all doing here, but in one piece.

            “What’s going on here?” she asks slowly. “Did something happen?” she asks looking at me now. I widen my eyes and let out one unchecked ‘ha’ before I realize how crazy I sound, bordering on hysteric.

             “That’s a bit of an understatement. I almost got assassinated,” I tell her wryly. Her jaw drops and her eyebrows raise in surprise.

             “Oh. And you all thought he, or they, would come after me next?” Dwalin nods his head. “Well then.” Her tone is surprised and she looks at me like I’m about to tell her everything. _‘Maybe later.’_

             “Yikes is right,” I speak up and Thorin looks over to me with almost unchecked concern.

             “Do you have any idea why?” she asks and I shake my head.

             “Because we’re different,” I shrug. “He could have thought that I was a-a-a pretender, someone who doesn’t belong in this world’s version of their social hierarchy. Someone who would see me, us, as less than them.”

              Thorin clears his throat drawing our attention. “Because of this, Dwalin is going to assign you both guards until we are sure that all of them are weeded out and found.”

             “I have a few guards in mind. I’d like you to meet them since they may find you a little more challenging than the usual assignments,” Dwalin grunts and I raise my eyebrows with a look that asks ‘what the hell?’.

               I laugh nervously before asking, “What the hell does is that supposed to mean?” He gives me the same expression in return but Balin comes to his rescue.

             “What he means is that. . .Well you two certainly have a knack for trouble as well as a penchant for disobeying orders.” He gives me a pointed look.

              “Thank you. That’s very nice of you to say,” I deadpan. Lena snorts and laughs brightly for a moment before reclaiming her composure.

              “You’re-,” she chuckles, “You’re something else honey.” She shakes her head before looking back to Dwalin. “When do we meet them?”

             “Tomorrow would be best,” Nori interjects. “I’m going to be. . .checking in on them and their activities.” I give a smile at his careful word choice and when I look at Lena I see she’s wearing the same expression.

              “You should just say spying on them. That would be easier and we don’t mind if you don’t mind,” Lena tells him and I nod.

              “It doesn’t matter to us.” Thorin, Dwalin, and Balin look at us with shock. “I know that you may not think it’s honorable but we don’t mind at all. Really.” He smiles at us and shakes his head.

              “Good to know, but I must be gettin’ to it,” he smirks and nods before leaving us alone with three dwarves.

              “To air on the side of caution, you both are not to go anywhere alone. Even if you are with each other you need someone from the company to go with you. Agreed?” Thorin’s tone brokers no argument as we both nod. “Dwalin take Lena and find Fili to make him aware of the situation. I will take Clara back to my chambers.” The guard nods his head while Lena looks at me with a tired expression. Thorin takes hold of my hand to lead me out of the room and into the quiet of the hall where we don’t wait to walk back to the rooms.

                I tug on his hand the moment we reach the top of the stairs of the royal wing. “Thorin, wait,” I hesitate and he turns with concern in his eyes. “I’m sorry if I’ve put you in danger too,” I whisper but he continues to tug me along until I shut the door behind me and that’s when he changes. It's the side that only I get to see when there isn't anyone he needs to save face around. Not with Fili or Kili, but only with me. He's warm and comforting and surprisingly doting toward me when we're in private. He's may seem grumpy and angry with everyone else but I see right through that to this side of him that emerges, seemingly, out of nowhere.

               “Oh, my Clara! Are you sure that you’re alright? Let me see your head,” he pries as he turns me to the side and threads his fingers through my hair until he reaches the sore spot and I wince. “I am so sorry that you had to go through that.” I nod a bit as I let him mother me.

               “I guess it comes with courting you mister dark, strong, and handsome,” I whisper and he moans lightly as I run my fingers through his hair too, being careful to not tug on his braids. “It’s alright Thorin. It happens I guess but I’m going to turn in for the night unless you want to talk more with me. It’s been a bit of a draining day and I just. . .” I sigh as he holds me tighter to his chest and I revel in the feel of him against me. His broad, solid, encompassing body pressing close to me and squeezing my curves.

               “I will join you there then,” he breathes into my hair before he rubs his hands on my lower back making my heart burst with a sense of domestic joy. “I was up early this morning as well, so I would love to finally lie down with you until I am called off on some other duty.” He kisses my neck and shoulder before leaning on me more. It’s a moment frozen in time as we stand there in each other's embrace in the silence.

               We finally slip under the furs of the large bed and immediately his arms reach for me before I turn to reach out back to him. He settles with tugging me close to his chest with his impressive strength while I bury my nose into his shoulder. The warmth from his skin is more comforting than any blanket could ever be and I feel ultimately loved with just him. “I love you,” I whisper into his chest before shutting my eyes and tuck my head into his shoulder.

               His hands wind into my clothing, dipping under to feel my skin against his own. His fingers caressing my back delicately while his arms weigh on me comfortingly before replying, “As I love you.”

 


	3. No Reprieve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena and Clara meet their new guards and settle some awkward moments that come up. Clara finds her new niche within the chaos of the mountain while Lena, unfortunately, only finds more trouble that opens her eyes to the dangers of the mountains.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own. 
> 
> Ugh! School is a real killer but I'm getting through it. The chapters are coming along a little slow but I'm so glad that people still read and love them! I always appreciate the comments and kudos, and I hope that you continue the adventure with my two lovely characters!  
> Thanks again!

**Chapter 3**

Third Person POV

            Both girls wear something more remotely nice than their usual comfy studying clothes for this meet and greet. Nicer colored shirts with some good layers that make them look less rag-tag. Lena sits in her chair with her leg bouncing in anticipation of meeting random peoples. “And you’re sure that we should be assigned guards?” Lena asks Dwalin one more time just to make sure that maybe there was a chance to back out. She isn’t worried about not getting along but rather about having someone there even when she isn’t feeling up for the company and not being able to just walk away when she’s had enough. Clara and Dwalin give her twin sighs.

            He flashes her an annoyed glare that doesn’t have a lot of heat behind it. “Yes, you do, so stop whinin’ about it,” he chastises her gently. _‘Anxious for sure’_ he mentally mutters. He waits with the two girls to watch over their interviews and mainly to make sure that he made the right choices about their guards. It wasn’t as easy as he had hoped, unfortunately.

            He needed to observe the guards he had in mind more heavily than usual to see if there were matching traits between them and the lasses. For Lena he would need someone that isn’t cold or intimidating to her, ‘ _so everything opposite of a guard’_ he thinks snarkily. For Clara, he would need someone to watch her while she’s with him and to keep her from sneaking off too often since keeping her safe means he has to be with her. ‘ _What a task I have’_ he sighs.

            The quiet does little to settle Lena’s nerves as she sits and waits for the guard to show up while her mind thinks things like _‘what if we don’t get along at all’, ‘what if he ends up hating me’_. It goes on and on as she just has to sit and wait. She thinks about speaking up again but one glance at Dwalin’s stoic face makes her reconsider.

            Clara, on the other hand, is excited at the idea of a new friend that she can possibly irritate and have fun with, pushing the boundaries of what’s socially acceptable. She already has thought of ways to escape their watchful gaze and sneak up to the secret room the girls found when she’s had enough of the smothering. She can tell Lena is nervous about having someone with her the whole time and it’s definitely not overexaggerated. The need for someone to really like them as they are is a pretty big worry. Clara may not show it but she’s just as nervous as she wrings her hands tightly.

            The door opens with a small whoosh as the two dwarves walk into the room. Lena and Clara can barely contain their nerves now. _‘No backing out now’_ Clara thinks. Dwalin stands to greet them and while the three have a small exchange Lena takes in what she can of them.

            One has a long hair and a thick brown beard with a matching mustache braided heavily until it tapers out at the bottom like a triangle shape. He has a scar across his cheekbone and ragged looking eyebrows like Beorn. His eyes are as light as his beard so it makes him look less cold but certainly not less intimidating. ‘ _He must be older than Fili but not as old as Dwalin’_ she thinks to herself. He’s shorter than her by a few inches but he makes up for his height in the rest of his appearance with the big broad shoulders. For someone so compact to be so thick and burly, no wonder he’s a guard! He’s like a mini wall made out of solid iron!

            The other has a deep black beard, almost blue-black, with many different braids tied together with ornate beads, almost reminding her of an octopus with how many strands he has put together. He has a heavy mustache as well that comes down to be braided as well into the different strands. His head is bald around the top and in place of his hairline, there are triangle geometric patterns tattooed on him. He’s built just as solidly as the first dwarf although he’s as tall as Lena herself. _‘Probably for Clara’_ Lena thinks with a small shiver.

             The black haired guard looks past Dwalin and makes eye contact with Clara to give her a toothy grin and nod. _‘Now I know he isn’t my guard’_ Lena is sure. She looks over at Clara for her reaction and only finds a blank face from his forwardness.

             Dwalin waves them forward with a hand and out of the corner of Lena’s eye she sees Clara start to stand so she stands as well. Both of the guards step forward and give formal bows that make the girls a little uneasy. _‘This is a ton of respect for someone they’ve never met’_ Clara thinks in shock. _‘They don’t say a single word until Dwalin has told them to’_ she notices. This whole world has such a confusing hierarchy.

             “This is lady Lena. You will be assigned to her and her alone until the assassins are found,” Dwalin orders gruffly. It’s a tone that offers finality and the guards know there will be no argument.

             “My lady, my name is Harfur, son of Nordar, at your service,” he bows lowly to Lena. His voice is also gruff and low like most dwarves but the tone of it is not unpleasant. She bows her head back to him out of respect and shifts of her feet as there’s a break of silence. Dwalin is the one to save everyone from the painful silence of introductions by stepping to the side and motioning toward the only other human in the room.

             “This is lady Clara.” Dwalin’s tone is the same as before and the black-haired dwarf bows deeply to her. Clara nods her head back and watches him carefully for any signs that he may not like her. Her nerves are practically making her vibrate. She flashes him a small smile as he stands stiff as a board waiting for an order or some sort of greeting from her too.

            “My lady, my name is Jorah son of Yoran, at your service.” His voice is deep and clear, almost like Thorin’s and Dwalin’s.

            “Please come and sit with me,” Clara offers with a wave of her hand to one of the abandoned seats, “I would like to ask you a few questions.” Jorah looks at her with an uncomfortable tight expression before he nods his head once and sits across from her in an embroidered seat. Lena looks at Harfur for a second before taking Clara’s lead and sitting with him as well.

            “Tell me about yourself,” Clara prompts kindly and she can see the reluctance in his eyes towards answering her question and how he would rather work only.

            “What would you like to know my lady?” he asks her stoically. _‘Of course, he’ll be a bit stuffy at first’_ she thinks with a sigh.

             She makes a face at the title. “Please, call me Clara. You’ll learn that I’m not that much of a lady,” she jokes and at her smile he starts to relax his stiff posture. “I guess anything that you’re willing to offer up right now would be fine. I promise you that I’ll talk your ear off in the time we’re together,” she assures with a chuckle.

             “I am from the Iron Hills army and I have spent my entire life there as well. I have been given the opportunity to come to Erebor and I am grateful for that.” He sounds as if he’s stating some company line, but he also does sound grateful for being a part of something so historical.

             “Then I’m glad that you do as well. Shall we get on with our day?” she asks with an expectant glance and with on raise of Dwalin’s eyebrows in a ‘go ahead’ expression, she stands up and promptly takes off with Jorah to go on her own small adventures.

              Lena sits there with Harfur in silence for a second, not sure what to ask him, and not sure what to do at this point. “Tell me something about you,” she copies Clara’s line. “Let’s start there, oh and call me Lena. None of that lady stuff really applies to me either.”

             “I am from the Grey Mountains but I traveled to the Iron Hills when I heard about approaching army and the coming battle,” he tells her in his deep timbre. His face is soft but his words are rehearsed and hard.

             “Well what do you enjoy doing when you’re not busy training or guarding?” she wonders quietly. The crackling of the fire is the only sound in the silence that’s hanging between them. Harfur doesn’t answer right away so the silence only becomes longer and longer, ramping up the awkward feeling in the air.

             Eventually, he answers with a small shrug. “I don’t do much. I train very hard and I serve very proudly.” _‘Of course he says that’_ Lena thinks with a sigh. He’s very stiff sitting there with his back rigid and is probably feeling just as uncomfortable as Lena. He reminds her of someone who would only go to the gym and then sleep, eat, and do it all again another day. They both fall silent again, leaving the room empty. Lena looks toward Dwalin for silent help but he’s gone! _‘Dwalin!’_ she shouts to herself.

            “That’s great,” she says shortly and stands to leave but Harfur also stands and shadows her. _‘Oh great’_ she groans. _‘Here we go.'_

             They walk around for a little while, heading back down the mountain toward the library to continue reading about laws when someone slams into Lena without looking sending her spinning a little with a grunt.

             “Beardless, blind child. . .” one dwarf says lowly and Lena makes a face at that nasty comment. Fili had explained that calling someone beardless was one of the worst comments next to being called an Orc. Her brow pinches and Harfur doesn’t miss it. He holds his questions in until they’re in private but he’s not sure if he even wants to ask, or even if he’s allowed to ask.

             They reach the great library with little issue but Lena still sighs. She’s tired of being insulted by passing dwarves who think they don’t belong. _‘I guess it’s going to be like that anyway. At least Fili loves me’_ she tells herself silently.

            “My lady,” Harfur startles her out of her self-deprecation and back to being on the task of pulling books out. “Do they insult you often?” he asks her as softly as he can in the gruff and guttural language to see if his prediction was right. She nods her head forgetting to keep her knowledge a slight secret.

            “It’s. . . They do it but I just don’t understand why they hate me for no reason,” she replies to him quietly. She looks down at her feet while her frown grows and her heart sinks. There’s a huff that pulls her attention back to the gentle giant next to her. When she looks up at Harfur she sees his eyes are no longer soft they’re steely with a dangerous glint.

            “You are courting the Crown Prince of Erebor and you are a part of the company that saved this Kingdom,” he insists with a stern face. Lena thinks on that and nods her head a little in agreement though still feeling low about herself. “They should treat you with the respect that you deserve. I may only be your guard, but I will tell you if anyone disrespects you in that regard while I am near, I will take that as good as a threat.” Lena holds his sharp gaze and she feels empowered by someone that she’s barely known for an hour or so.

            “I think that we’ll get along very well,” she whispers. He nods his head once sharply and goes back to standing watch as she puts books away and pulls more out.

_WITH CLARA_

           Clara and Jorah have been on their own for a while, just the two of them with Clara talking his ear off and practically forcing him to do the same thing. So far, she’s learned that his mother and father had practically forced him into the army, teaching him how to fight and survive, and basically turning him in to another Dwalin. They make their way down to the base of the mountain and Clara finds herself in a new place that she’s never been before.

          “Have you ever had a guard before Clara?” Jorah asks and she shakes her head.

          “I’ve never had to need one. Where I’m from, there is no need unless you’re of very high importance or aren’t well liked.” She reminds herself of all of these movie stars and politicians that have big men following them everywhere. “Why do you ask?”

          They make eye contact and Clara can tell this is serious. “I would like to be honest and tell you that master Dwalin told me you get into danger a great deal of the time, and I would also like to inform you that in such cases I will physically drag you back to safety against your will, if I must.” Clara pales and bristles at the same time.

          “Let me set one thing very straight,” she tells him with a straight face. “I do not go looking for trouble, trouble usually finds me. What puts me in danger is doing the right thing when everyone else decides not to.” Jorah looks at the ground for a moment before meeting her eyes again. “I don’t do something just because it’s reckless. I do it because I think it’s what’s right,” she lowers her voice in conviction. The pair leave it at that and continue walking, and Clara continues exploring her new home.

           It isn’t until she stops and looks at a large pair of doors that Jorah speaks again. “My lady-,” Clara flashes him a glare, “-Clara these are the stables,” he tries to tell her this as though he thinks she won’t want to get dirty or smell like a barn. _‘Wrong’_ Clara’s brain chimes. If anything, she’s so happy to have found it (being the animal lover that she is).

           She looks at him with a glance that says _‘duh!’_ and then walks off further into the stables to find what she really gets excited about. The hallway leads into large stalls made of wrought iron gates with deep brown wood held in place with iron bolts. They look as heavy as other great doors found around the kingdom. There are horses in one row, pigs in a large pen near the back, boars in their separate pens, and even more interestingly big horned rams. Huge, strong, shaggy battle rams with the largest horns she’s ever seen in her life that really are big enough to ride.

          “Oh my god. Have you ever seen anything so beautiful? WOW!” she breathes lowly. “This is absolutely incredible!” she gasps at the large sight and takes a deep breath of the comforting smell of animals. Everything she ever dreamed of doing back at home training and working with animals comes to the forefront of her mind, and now it’s a want—no, a need.

           “Someone grab that horse!” A man shouts at the end of the hall and Clara watches as a deep brown colored horse runs down the hall, dragging its lead rope down behind her while all of the other animals look on with what seems like envy at its freedom.

           “Got him!” Clara shouts to the dwarf as Jorah tries to push her out of the way but she holds her ground before snatching the rope in her hands and holding on for dear life. The impact of the horse running is more than enough to fling her forward into a sprint with a bit of a small shriek. She plants her feet on the ground, feeling the force pull hard on her muscles- almost to the point of ripping her arms off- and tugs hard. It’s just enough backward force to whip the horses head around, startling it out of running and now focusing on the person holding onto him.

           “Clara step back!” Jorah yells at her but she refuses to listen. Her blood is pumping so loudly in her ears that she might as well be deaf.

           “Woah there pretty boy,” she soothes, trying to get the horse to settle down long enough to slowly work her way to the top of the rope and get control of his head. “Settle, settle down,” she tries again and the skittish horse slowly starts to calm down to the surprise of the dwarves around her. It must look like quite the odd sight, a seemingly weak human girl taming a horse almost over four times her size and at least ten times her strength.

           “Thank you-,” the young dwarf pants but stops as soon as he sees Clara’s face. He pales when he looks at Jorah standing menacingly next to her. “You’re- I- My lady!” The young dwarf stutters out. He bows very lowly until he’s almost at a 90 degree angle before straightening out again.‘ _What the hell is that about?’_ Clara’s eyes widen to comical proportions. “My lady you should not be down here. It is too dangerous for you and you may distract the animals.” Clara’s temper absolutely flares.

           “Well it looks like you don’t have much control here on your own,” she retorts impatiently. She looks the calm horse over to give his smooth nose a gentle rub and place a quick kiss on it. “And it looks like you don’t have much of a knack for training him, if that’s what you were doing.” The trainer is taken aback at her harsh words and fumbles and stutters for an excuse but comes up with nothing. Clara makes a split decision.

            “I’m going to be taking over the training for this horse.” The silence after that statement is deafening. The only other noise is the huffs and bleats of goats and horses. “You look a little overwhelmed right?” she asks the poor stunned dwarf. _‘Probably a little older than Fili’_ she guesses.

           “Well it’s just me and a few others down here my lady,” he replies quickly, “But really we have it under control. Some of the animals aren’t good with the training so we have to train them harder and that’s when he ran away.” Clara sighs at his response. _‘Typical.’_

           “What’s your name?” Clara looks at him gently but her tone brokers an answer right away.

            The dwarf looks down at the ground, anywhere but her eyes. “Varis, my lady,” he answers quietly.

           “Well master Varis, your first mistake is saying that the animals are bad with the training. If they are bad at it then you are not being clear or consistent with your teaching.” The dwarf hangs his head and nods. “Your second mistake is not asking for more help down here. There are a lot of animals around and I think it’ll take more than four or five dwarves to take care of all of them properly. So, I’ll help you.” Varis snaps his head up and Jorah shifts on his feet.

           “My lady, this is no place for someone such as yourself-,” he tries that bullshit line again and Clara holds up her hand.

           “Well, now it is because I don’t mind dirt, shit, or men who don’t think I belong.” Clara looks at him expectantly as Varis looks at Jorah for help but gets none. “Well, I’m glad that we got that out of the way. Why don’t you show me the rest of the stables and I’ll hold onto this pretty boy right here? Alright? Great!” She doesn’t even take the time to let him answer before she grabs him by the shoulder, turns him, and basically leads herself and everyone else.

_WITH LENA_

            “I should get out of here finally. Do you know your way around Erebor yet? I don’t think that I know quite enough yet,” she chatters on closing books and making a small pile for the next day. “OH! I-We should explore!” she realizes suddenly. “Do you know where the mines are?” Harfur looks at her like she’s crazy and she deadpans. “If you don’t show me where to go then I will find it myself and get lost.”

            Harfur sighs heavily. “I will show you the mines but we mustn’t stay long and you will stay in my sight at all times.” Lena smiles and nods her head in agreement to those terms.

            They walk down further than the base of the mountains where the stones gives way to dirt paths made of deep dark brown dirt with large rocks. The walls become rounded and bumpy with large boulders that have been carved away early in Erebor’s history and their early mining. The air feels wet against her skin and the smell is like fresh earth after a heavy rain, but not like soaking wet mud.

            Harfur stops in his steps to turn to her. “Now you stay close to me. These tunnels may be unstable in some parts.” Lena nods and continues on to drag her hands against the wall taking some dirt around her too. She walks on and on, not noticing how far she is behind Harfur until there’s a noise. Just a breath of a noise in the back of her ears, a ghost of a sound that she may have heard. She pauses for a moment to make sure she’s sure of what she heard. Then it happens.

            The first thing she hears is the trickle of dirt, particles and clumps falling onto the floor and onto her head while the floor seems to be moving under her feet. “Lena!” Harfur shouts. He is less than ten feet away from her, but as she turns to look at his face her feet fall from under her, sending her into a freefall.

            She screams in shock but it’s masked by the sound of the cave-in. For a second she’s suspended in space before the shock of her feet hitting the solid ground and tremoring up her legs. At the bottom of the hole there’s just enough room for her to put her hands out to her sides but it’s too tight to do much more than stand straight.

            Harfur has to watch as his, most likely, future princess is sucked into a stray shaft that has been forgotten and unfound. “NO!” he cries as he slides on his belly quickly to try to grab her but is too late only by a few seconds to touch her fingertips. He scrambles back to avoid being potentially sucked as well but he needs to see if she’s alright. _‘The king is going to kill me, Dwalin is going to kill me, Prince Fili is going to kill me’_ he internally groans.

            Lena looks up to find her view to be obscured by the darkness around the top of the hole but can make out Harfur’s face leaning over the opening. “Lena! Are you uninjured? Can you move?” Her head is still swimming from the sudden shock but she checks all of her faculties and all of her joints.

            “Yeah I’m alright! I don’t want to be down here though!” she shouts back. The sound of her voice gets dampened and absorbed by the height of the walls and the loose soil and rock. She closes her eyes for a second but finds that it doesn’t bring down her panic. _‘Please get me out of here!’_ she panics. Her heart beats out of her chest that’s tightening like a vice, robbing her of her breath and her voice. “Harfur get me out of here!” she yells as her voice takes on a higher pitch.

             She’s getting flashbacks from her childhood of claustrophobia in elevators, stairwells, and MRI’s in the hospital. The lack of light and the lack of space makes her feel the exact same sense of anxiety and lack of focus. “Harfur?” she calls out waiting for a response but still not getting one. _‘Oh my god he’s gone’_ her mind tells her causing her to panic even more. “Harfur?” she tries one more time again even louder than before as her mind plays tricks on her. The walls feel as if they’re closing in and the dirty air hurts her lungs, making it harder for her to breathe properly.

             Harfur’s face suddenly reappears over the hole. “Lena, I must go and get rope to get you out but I need you to not dig in the hole. You will be fine and I will get you out but you need to stay still and not panic. Lena?” She looks up and a small croak come out of her mouth as she’s not sure what to say in response. She wants to tell him not to go, don’t leave her alone in the dark, and to please just get her out.

            “Just do it and come back!” she yells, nearly screams at him, as she closes her eyes and tries to imagine herself somewhere else. _‘Alright, deep deep breathing’_ she tries to calm herself. She gulps in air but finds that the longer she paws and claws at the walls, the harder it is to breathe. Her hands tremble fiercely and small sobs find their way through her lips. She tries to muffle them, knowing Harfur and others will get her out, but ultimately being trapped down here until then brings her to petrified tears.

            Harfur nods his head as he draws back from the opening to find help and find a rope to pull her up. He barely gets out of the cave before he runs into some other miners and spots what he really needs; rope. The only downside of who he spots is that it’s another member of the company.

            Now Lord Bofur, but it is he who coincidentally comes down to check the upper mines to find a stray dwarf who look like he has no business down here among the other miners with his fine clothes and even finer weapons.

            “Lord Bofur,” Harfur bows his head respectively but ultimately knows he has to skip the pleasantries and reluctantly admit his mistake. “There has been an accident and lady Lena has fallen in a stray shaft,” he explains quickly and watches as Bofur’s eyes widen to nearly the size of his head.

            “Well then what are you doing waiting around here for!” Bofur snaps slamming past him to get to his good friend out of the mine shaft. He runs as fast as he can before reaching the steep drop, sliding forward on his belly to look down and sees Lena standing in the dark at the bottom. “Lena? You alright down there lass?” he calls out.

             “Yeah!” her voice breaks and it’s clear that she’s been crying in the short time she’s been alone down there. _‘Poor thing is terrified’_ he realizes with shock.

             “I’m going to get you out of there. We’re going to lower this rope and tug you out, but you have to hold very, very tight lass.” He stands a few feet from the edge and with a final glare at Harfur he tosses the rope down the shaft. Lena feels something tangle in her hair suddenly. A weight that wasn’t there before getting tabled in her hair and with her overactive senses her first thought is a snake, so she screams shrilly before swatting at the rope for dear life. After a second she stops and grabs onto the rope, getting the feel of it and assuring herself that it’s not a snake and it’s fine, before giving it a firm tug.

             The tug tells Bofur that she’s grabbed on and so they pull with all of their might. It’s almost comical how fast they pull her up. With how much fear and stress has been involved in the past twenty or so minutes, it’s nearly wiped out in the instant her feet hit the top surface again. She comes zipping up like she weighs nothing to the two burly dwarves leaving her zapped of her energy after her near panic attack.

            “You’re alright there lass, you’re alright,” Bofur tries to assure her when he sees the state that she’s in. She’s dirty, shaking, and has tear tracks streaming down her face. When she falls to her knees next to the hole, he tugs her close and hugs her tight. “You’re alright. Just gave you a fright yeah? I guess you don’t wanna be a miner now do ya’?” he jokes, and it earns a mix between a pitiful laugh and a sob. He rubs her shoulders comfortingly, trying to get the dirt off of her but only smearing it around more. “Let’s get you out of here and cleaned up.”

             The walk up is dead silent. Bofur holders her hand and lets her lean on him while Harfur trails behind the two practically drowning in self-pity and deprecation. It’s late at night so the halls are fairly dark except for the torches lining the side. Bofur stops at her and Fili’s room where he’s going to leave her. They say their hushed goodbyes and Harfur enters the room with her.

            “Lena!” Fili cries the moment he sees her state, jumping from a chair and rushing forward to sweep her up in a tight hug. “Oh what happened to you?” he pulls back to cup her face and look her over for the reason there are tear lines along her face. When she doesn’t answer he turns to Harfur with a dangers glint in his blue eyes and his mustache beads pulling his frown even further down. “What happened?” he orders sharply. Harfur looks as if he’s about to throw up.

            “I was showing her the upper mines when she stumbled on a covered shaft and fell in. It was too deep to get her out myself so I went to find help and lord Bofur came to my aid. My prince, I failed in my service. I understand that I did not do my duty to protect lady Lena and I will dismiss myself from her duty if you see it fit,” he recalls with a thick voice and an ashamed expression. He drops to one knee in front of Fili and bows his head in complete submission to the prince.

            “Lord Dwalin will deal with you on that matter as well as Lady Lena. For now, you are dismissed.” His tone is hard and cold and offers no hope for his position. Harfur bows lowly again before retreating from the room leaving Lena and Fili alone in the cavernous bedroom suite. “Are you alright Lena?” he asks her again, and this time his tone is opposite of a minute ago very soft, very caring.

            “I was really scared,” she whispers and his heart breaks within his chest as his expression falls. “I don’t like tight spaces and that was really tight. I-,” her voice breaks, and after a tiring day it’s completely understandable. She nearly falls over him, slumping her body on his so that their heads are at the same height.

            “It’s alright now, love. Come and wash off all of the dirt for the night and I’ll draw you a bath. How does that sound? Hm?” he whispers in her ear. Lena nods her head with her expression still broken. She strips off the soiled layers of clothing while Fili fills the tub with warm water and pours in a bit of what smells close to vanilla scented oil. She slips into the warm water feeling it, at first, singe her skin but then settle out like in the hot springs. They’re silent as they go about their separate tasks with Fili holding her head back and washing her hair, watching it change from brown back to blonde, and Lena starting to wash her body.

             She closes her eyes for what feels like a second only to be patted awake by Fili. She can tell that some time has passed from the change in temperature of the water. “Come on love,” he whispers and tugs her up, not at all worried by the drips of water landing on the floor. She dries off haphazardly to slip on a nightgown placed near the bathtub and then shuffles her way toward her warm bed. The bed and Fili feel heavenly against her body. His body curves against hers to wrap protectively against her keeping her from the outside world, making her wish that she never had to get out of the protective sheets and his arms. It makes her feel as though as long as she stays right here, in this moment, nothing bad could ever happen.

            “I love you so much,” she whispers tiredly. It earns a tightening embrace from him.

            “I am so happy that you’re safe,” he whispers back. His words feel good to her for a second before she shifts around with uneasiness to look at him in the eyes.

           “Why do these things happen to us? They keep happening and I-,” her voice breaks, “I’m already so tired of it. All of these accidents, attacks, and whatever else is-... It’s draining Fili. I feel so sad and worried and have nightmares almost every night. Sometimes I don’t even want to sleep,” she finishes and pinches her eyes closed allowing tears to drop and hit her nose.

            Fili’s heart has broken further and further since Lena has entered the room. Everything from the tattered look, broken expression, and now this admission of emotional turmoil rips him apart. _‘There is no one that I love more than her’_ he thinks heavily. _‘I must do better.’_

            “I promise you that it will be alright. Maybe not right now, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually it will be alright. I will be your rock, I will hold you together, and I will protect you from all of that. Here you are safe from nightmares, outside of here I will always come running for you, and I will move mountains for you. Never forget that I am here.” He brushes her tears away from her cheeks with his strong fingers and pulls her close to him so that her head is resting under his chin in a warm embrace.

            “Remember that I love you and it will work out. Now go to sleep love. You’ve had quite the day,” he sighs heavily, blowing some of her hair around and feels her nod under his chin. The more he thinks about it, the more he realizes that she’s right. They continue to be haunted by these horrible events that must be shocking them to their core. He places one last kiss to the crown of her head and closes his eyes, hoping that tomorrow will be the turning point for her, and hopes that talking to the company about this will figure out a way to help them.


	4. Serpent Taming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clara spends time with Thorin learning the role that she someday will take on among the mind-numbing bureaucracy of Erebor. She's coming into her own as she solves problems left and right while also being smitten with her relationship with Thorin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its character, only my own.
> 
> Thanks for everyone keeping up with the story! It's been a very trying week so I'm trying to get back on track with releasing chapters on Friday but no promises. Again, I'm so glad that people are liking the second story and I hope that you keep up with it and leave some great comments for me to read!  
> Thanks again!

**Chapter 4**

Clara POV

            “I would like you to try something with me,” Thorin starts and my radar is on for any funny business. “Don’t give me that look Clara,” he adds good-naturedly with a sly smile. I moan and tilt my head back.

            “Oh you know it makes me all hot when you tell me what to do,” I tilt my head back even further exposing my neck to him, letting my hair brush my hands since it’s grown so much in the past months. Thorin had to convince, more like coax me not to cut it when I thought it was too long, and after nearly seizing the sheers straight out of my hands I stopped him and forced him to explain. Turns out it’s a sign of shame to cut your hair short. Who knew! I know he loves it when I let my hair hang freely without any beads or braids and loves the way it moves in the free air so I run my fingers through the strands knowing it’ll draw his eye.

            “Oh love, you are insatiable,” he growls with a hot glance in my direction. “You know as well as I do we don’t have time to have another go since we,” he stresses, “need to be in court soon.” I freeze and widen my eyes as I lock mine with Thorin’s deep blue.

            “Me? Court?” I ask dumbly and he laughs loudly at my shock. _‘God I love that sound’_ I internally groan. Everything this dwarf does drives me crazy!

            “Yes, I’ve arranged for you to observe today since I know you must be tired of simply reading law and proceedings, so you will witness it firsthand.” His smirk is plastered to his face as I sit there with my mouth wide. He goes back to getting ready while the thoughts and some doubts swirl around my mind. ‘ _A bunch of old dwarves judging me and my ability to help Thorin? What could go wrong?’_ I shiver.

            “You want me to come to court with you? Really? Are you sure?” I ask him again. Most likely the fifth time I’ve asked in the past minute but I want to make sure he knows what he’s doing. Thorin turns to me with an exasperated look on his face.

            “I want you to come to court with me because you said yourself that the other nobles do not see you as important, so now is your chance to prove them wrong, I know they are wrong” he explains patiently. He slips on his robes, adjusting them and making sure that there is no fiber out of place before securing his beads in his hair. I watch him with envy. I don’t know what to wear, how to walk or talk, or even how to braid my own hair in these crazy styles.

            I suddenly feel cold with dread. “What should I wear? I’m really following all of your cues today. I’m super lost with this,” I stress with a nervous smile and he nods his head. He may not be laughing out loud but his eyes are bursting with it. He looks at me sitting on the couch close to naked, waiting for him to dress me like I’m some small child. If anything, I would go in regular pants and a tunic, but apparently, that’s not nearly acceptable enough for all of these lords.

            He looks at me with wide eyes. “You’re nervous? Clara,” he tuts quietly. I nod and shrug as he lets out a chuckle followed by a frown. “You’ve met some of the worst creatures in Middle Earth yet you are afraid of a table full of lords,” he chuckles some more in disbelief as he puts in his heavy beads. “You could simply wear that,” he deadpans with a wave of his hand toward me. _‘What a complete brat!_ ’ I think incredulously. I open my mouth in disbelief at his sense of humor and a smile plays at the corners of my lips. _‘Two can play at this game.’_

            I lay back on the bed, stretching my arms above my head and arching my back innocently. “I could also show everyone these love bites you give me. I bet you would like that, wouldn’t you, my king?” I lower my voice at the end, extending the sheet hanging on the bed with my legs revealing my naked torso to him and I can see his eyes darken from across the space to the vanity. Even though he knows I’m doing it for the sex appeal, I know that he appreciates the title from me every once in a while.

            It had been a tough spat with him when he asked why. I told him, respectfully, when I first settled in the same room that I would not bow to him and I would not be subservient to him because that’s just not my nature. Sure I’m quiet and I’m shy to new people but I’m no ones lesser. I told him that if he couldn’t accept me as I was then we were setting ourselves up for trouble. It had taken a few stressful days of some light arguments, brooding, and snapping from him to think about it, but in the end, he came around to my conditions. I just want to be equal.

            He shuts his eyes slowly and tilts his head back as I watch him suppress a shiver and most likely a groan. “Keep that up and we definitely won’t make it to council,” he mutters as he takes another deep breath to center himself. I walk over, abandoning my sheets and the warm bed, to stand behind him and place my lips along his temple and drape my arms around his broad shoulders.

            His hair is always so soft and thick in my hands. _‘I wonder what the secret is to such beautiful hair’_ I muse silently. “Then you’d better keep your focus,” I whisper hotly in his ear. He grunts and turns sharply to pull me to him and place a searing kiss on my lips that I quickly reciprocate. It’s a hot mess of teeth and tongue that leave me breathless and panting.

            “Then you’d better get dressed or you will have to go like that,” he fires back making me chuckle. “Let me pick something out for you,” he offers so I don’t argue one bit. He picks out a dress to put over my binder, telling me that I should think about getting a corset (that I refuse), and helps me lace myself into the deep blue dress with fitted sleeves, a gold cord that ties around the whole ribcage, and my regular brown boots fitting snugly on my feet. He also shows me how to re-braid my hair in the pattern that apparently tells the other dwarves I’m his consort or courting partner or something.

             Thorin tells me not to get frustrated at it since it’s something that they all have learned from childhood. Something that differentiates each dwarf in the social circle, and something that is a necessity for me to have now that I live with them.

            “Lass I didn’ even recognize ya!” Dwalin jokes when he sees me and Jorah does a little double take but tries to hide his surprise. I don’t worry that much about the blush creeping up my neck, but I do give a shy smile as I click my tongue at his antics.

             We leave the royal hall and walk down to the meeting chambers down a few flights of stairs (the one that we met Thranduil and Bard in). “Are you ready?  You needn't have to speak if you do not want to,” he assures me quietly. If Dwalin and Jorah weren’t there he would have been more open with his affections, but I have all night with him to see that. I nod nervously and looks back at Dwalin and Jorah following us before nodding one more time. Thorin smiles at me. “There is no need to look so terrified my love. I know you will do well,” he whispers gently. He gives me one more fleeting smile before regaining his stoic expression. The guards at the door open both of them at the same time with a flourish leaving us at the mercy of a table full of eyes.

             The sound of scraping chairs is shockingly loud as every person in the room stands at attention for their king nearly scaring the shit out of me. _‘Fucking hell’_ I mentally breathe. There must be fifty or so people in here along with a few guards. The sheer amount of eyes on us is already making me sweat, but I try to copy Thorin’s straight back and straight face instead of staring at them like an idiot. There are two seats at the head of the table waiting for us. One of them has a higher back than the other, the tallest one obviously for Thorin and the smaller for me, and as we get to the end of the table everyone waits for Thorin to sit first.

             “Be seated,” he booms. Everyone sits right after his bottom touches the seat and so I sit after them.

             “Your Majesty,” one of the lords start, “if I may inquire as to who this woman of man is?”

              He gives the lord a chilling glare. “This is lady Clara Jones, one of the members of the company and she will be observing our proceedings today.”

             “Good morning my lords,” I nod my head to them in a sign of respect and some of them even nod back. ' _I haven't messed up yet'_ I assure myself.

             “My king this is highly unusual,” another one says quietly, stopping as he gets cut off by Thorin’s glare and I feel all eyes dissecting me as if I’m some new and unique animal under intense light.

             “My lady your accent is nothing like I have ever heard before. Where do you hail from?” he asks kindly but I feel my breath hitch in my throat.

              I clear my throat uncomfortably. “From the North, Lord. . .?” I trail off, hoping for his name and hoping that they’ll stop focusing on me.

             “Lord Harvi, my lady,” he smiles. I nod my head in acknowledgment but ultimately shut down his line of questioning.

             “Let us begin,” Thorin interrupts, waving his hand to the open table. There are endless amounts of paperwork laid in front of us, all written in runes and common, about everything from mines to trade and the upcoming settlers coming from the Blue Mountains. It’s all very overwhelming. Sometimes the more underhanded lords will slip into Khuzdul as if they “forgot” about my inability to speak their language, but I follow every word.

             “What are your opinions on this my lady? Do you believe this task to be of importance?” One dwarf asks out of the blue while I read the document about stone quality and where it’s harvested from. The black and white haired dwarf is leaving me, more like shoving me, out into the open like a sitting duck. I swear that he has a smirk on his face and it makes me want to hit it off him. Thorin glances at me and I know he will jump in to save me if I get too deep but my mouth still grows dry.

              When I don’t answer immediately, I see his smirk grow even wider and I know I have to say something even if it may sound vague and slightly stupid. “I think that it’s important to create a strong foundation with the correct stone otherwise whatever it is that you build will crumble. I also think that whether or not I personally believe it’s important, you must believe it is, otherwise you’re simply wasting our time,” I answer him calmly while holding his gaze and out of the corner of my eye I see some of the other lords cough as they try not to laugh.

              “I would never dream of that my lady,” he amends with a tight-lipped smile and we continue with our discussions.

              Hours later, I’m ready to either shoot myself or bang my head continuously against the hardwood table. _‘They never stop!’_ I scream in my head. It’s been hours since the crack of dawn when we started and it’s like we’ve done nothing and gone nowhere! Some of the issues have divulged into petty squabbles, but thankfully no one has asked me my opinion after I embarrassed the first lord.

              There is a sharp noise outside of the door and shouting until they burst open revealing a dirty Varis and causing quite the unrest from the lords. He has a headband on that keeps his hair out of his face with his beard hair pulled into one strand, looking neat despite the dust covering him everywhere.

              “Your Majesty, my lady,” he breathes quickly, “Clara there’s a problem.” He’s panting from what I suspect is the run up here from the stables.

               I frown but I keep my face passive instead of accidentally wearing my resting bitch face. “Is anyone dead or dying?” He shakes his head with another deep breath. “Is anyone injured?” Another shake of his head lifts my spirits even more. “Then what’s the matter Varis?” I ask with an expectant smile.

               His eyes are as wide as saucers as he breathes heavier and heavier. “We don’t know what to do Cla- my lady. There is chaos with the animals! We have no idea how it happened but there are serpents and rats everywhere! Some of the animals are being spooked faster than we can calm them.”

               I look over to Thorin who is watching with widened eyes and a pinched brow. I lean in to whisper in his ear, “I forgot to tell you but I also work in the stables. Surprise.” He turns his head toward me and I know I’m probably going to get a talking to later. “I’ll see you tonight?” I squeeze his hand for the question but also in a silent ‘I love you’. He nods shortly in an answer. “My lords,” I bid goodbye and sweep my way out of the meeting room with Varis who still is distraught.

              “Thank you, lady Clara! I sincerely apologize that I took you from council and I-,” I stop him there.

              “Varis. We are going to be calm, cool, and collected about this alright? Show me what the problem is,” I direct and we head straight for the stables. We don’t pass the gates and I can already hear the panicked noises of all of the animals, not just the horses. The second the door is opened I hear the amplified hissing of snakes, squeaking of mice, and every other noise all of these animals make. _‘Fuck’_ I breathe and I can’t hold it in. “Fuck,” I voice and Jorah whips his head to me. “Yeah, I have a foul mouth,” I add.

              “Lads, I brought help!” he calls and the posture of the other dwarves relax marginally when they see me.

              “What I want is for you to take as many of the penned animals out of here as you can and put them in an arena or somewhere other than here. Make sure they are locked up well,” I instruct and he nods. “Second I want you to gather everyone down here and I’m going to give you a quick lesson on gathering snakes.” _‘Poor guy’_ I think with pity. He looks so overwhelmed at this, almost to the point of tears. “It’ll be okay. I promise. Take another breath.”

              “Clara you should allow them to simply exterminate the vermin then move the animals back to their pens,” Jorah suggests and I flash him a glare.

              “Everything has its place here. If we find why the rats are here then we can get rid of the snakes too. It’s not that big of a problem as long as they aren’t venomous and don’t kill any of the animals, besides the rats of course,” I tell him with a smirk. He looks at me like I’m crazy. “The snakes eat the rats and then they’ll go when the rats are scared off.”

               Varis takes to the task of moving the animals while I take a look at the snakes. They don’t seem to be venomous, mainly rat snakes and what looks like a few mysteries, but damn are they big. Everything here in Middle Earth is either really big or vastly dangerous. The rats, on the other hand, are everywhere. No wonder there are so many snakes here because there are at least twice the number of rats! They’re big and furry and remind me of the city rats in New York.

               After they’re done moving the animals the stable crew meets me at the entrance to discuss the snakes. “So the snakes aren’t venomous, and most importantly we are not going to kill them. They were here before us and this is just as much their home as it is ours.” I get others making faces and I see many frowns at this announcement. “I know, I know. They aren’t very cute or cuddly but they eat rats and pests. Has anything changed in the way the animals are fed?” I ask and I get one nod and then there are many nods. “How?”

              “We’ve added in seeds and bran into the food,” another young dwarf adds. I don’t even have to say my connection as I see lights go off in each of their eyes.

              “So what do we have to do to fix it this time and avoid it later?” I call out. It feels like I’m teaching a class.

              “Store the feed more securely to avoid the rats. But what is to be done about the snakes?” he asks. “I’m sorry, I mean my lady,” he amends but I shake my head.

              “Down here I’m not ‘my lady’ or whatever fancy title you’re going to come up with. If you’d like to, we can work as a team and you can call me Clara. If you’d rather not, you can call me miss Clara but none of that lady stuff right?” I tell him with a small smirk and get one back in return. This earns another round of nods from them and I feel a spark of joy in my heart. _‘They like me’_ I realize with an internal grin. “As for the snakes, they’ll follow their food and if not then we can always move them by hand.”

               I take the time to show them how to handle the snakes and move them with the lowest chance of getting bitten or hurting the snakes (even though I get bitten myself), and they go out catching the snakes and herding the rats. I see one in the corner and decide that I can handle it well enough on my own.

               I think I might get a scolding later because the hem of my dress has become absolutely soiled, but I bring my mind back to the snake in front of me. It’s a beautiful black color with a cute little grey head and it is absolutely angry! It has the tight strike shape and big puffed out body and I know it’s meant to be intimidating, and boy it is! _‘I don’t think I can do this’_ I doubt myself nervously. I kneel down to begin the capture and my heart is beating out of my chest!

              “Clara!” Thorin yells from far away and I take my eyes off of the snake for only one second and that’s when I feel the teeth, like a hundred tiny needles digging through my sleeve and into my arm and this one digs in deep, curling right around my arm in a tight vice. It’s like a pointy blood pressure cuff that’s set on squeezing your arm off.

              “OW! Shit! Fuck!” I cry out but I resist pulling at the snake. _‘Damnit Thorin!’_ I curse and turn my body around to see Thorin running toward me with his dagger drawn and Dwalin right behind him. “Hi sweetie,” I grit out as the snake around my arm readjusts its grip with its teeth and bites in again. Thorin’s eyes are wide and disbelieving as they take in the scene before him: his lover before him soiled and dirty from the stables with a big black snake wrapped around her arm trying to squeeze the life out of it.

              “What in Mahal’s name are you doing woman!” he exclaims re-sheathing his dagger, rushing forward to meet me halfway and helping me uncoil the snake from my arm. He only calls me woman when he’s quite angry at my decision making. I don’t say anything to him until I feel the teeth retract from my arm and the head come off leaving the snake to settle down in my hands.

                I ignore Thorin for the time being even though he’s hovering worse than a mother hen. “Look at that. Just need a bit of a bite to figure out everything’s fine. Too big for you eh? Yeah, I bet you got a good bite outta me,” I talk to the big snake as I release it where we herded the rats. I turn to look at Thorin and Dwalin who stand there shocked. “I’m helping out with the problem down here, and I think it’s about done.” I smile as I put my hands on my hips even though my arm aches fiercely. “Youch!” I mutter and put pressure on it to try to relieve the burning ache to no avail.

               Thorin takes my arm in his big hands to look at the bite. It sounds cheesy but I love every second of his touch. Every touch and any touch even while I’m hurting (especially when I’m hurting). “How badly are you injured? I should not have allowed you to come down here,” he reprimands me and himself. He rolls up my sleeve to find some blood spotting my arm but it’s not that bad.

               “Clara-,” Varis starts but stops short when he sees Thorin. He drops into a low bow, “Your majesty! I apologize for intruding this morning and for taking lady Clara away from the council.” Thorin doesn’t do anything except stand there with a straight face and straight back.

               “What is your name?” he asks deeply.

               “Varis, your majesty.”

               “And are you in charge of the stables?” This is almost painful to watch as Varis sweats under Thorin’s questions. I know I shouldn’t be enjoying this but I smile sweetly anyway.

               “No my king. We were all from the Iron Hills army and were assigned here. The only one here who has been helping us is lady Clara. She truly has a way with the animals,” he tells Thorin quietly. I blush at the compliment.

                I decide to get him out of the line of fire. “Varis would you move the animals back to their stables?” He nods quickly and bows one more time before scurrying off. I laugh as I turn to Thorin.

               “Varis is a good help down here. He’s a very good listener, wonderful student as well, even though he keeps telling me ‘it’s not lady-like to be down here’.” Thorin laughs at that.

              “Well, at least I don’t have to tell you that as well. I’m slightly worried you will try to wrangle me as well as you did with that serpent,” he chuckles lowly and I shiver. _‘Stop that’_ I tell myself and swallow thickly.

              “Then you’ll get to see me wrangle this pretty boy that I came across yesterday. Oh he’s such a sweetheart though!” He raises one eyebrow and I laugh at the sight. “He’s a horse Thorin,” I laugh before going in for a delicate kiss. “You know you’re completely different with me than with anyone else,” I point out gently and his gaze softens. The lines that he usually carries in his forehead fade away as his features soften.

              “You bring out the joy in me,” he replies. “You’re very open with how you feel and it makes me wish to be the same with you,” he explains. “How could I have ever known I would be in love with such a wild woman. A wildling indeed,” he chuckles as I feign outrage.

              “Come on before I impart more of my wild ways on you,” I tease. I show him the deep brown horse I’ve affectionately name Eurus (Greek god of the east wind), and he greets me with a little grooming munch on my head. All in all the whole day has nearly gone by in the blink of an eye and without so much as a bite of a meal in between my personal crises I feel a little faint. I lean heavily against the wall and close my eyes with a sigh. I feel dizzy and exhausted, mentally and physically, from today. It’s still difficult to tell time inside of here but I can tell the sun is still up a little. _‘Must be evening’_ I note.

              “Clara? Are you alright?” Thorin comes up to me and holds my hands in his. He’s so warm that I nearly forget how cold I am before his touch. I nod my head and he squeezes my hands twice in a silent ‘I love you’.

              “It’s not a big deal, I’m low energy right now I guess. I just didn’t realize how hungry I was,” I laugh dryly. “Am I right guessing that it’s about time for dinner, or well supper as you call it,” I joke.

              “You’re getting better at telling time,” he comments happily. “Yes, it is about supper time. I’ve made arrangements for the company to come together for tonight.”

              “That’s wonderful! I should probably get cleaned up then.” I look down at the nice dress and cringe. It’s covered in dust around the bottom making a ring of brown against the deep blue fabric, and I smell of barn and horses, rams, and feed.

               I say my goodbyes to Varis and the others who say goodbye back happily with smile on their faces. The walk back upstairs is tough and long, making me even more tired than I already am. The warm water from the bath on my skin feels so good that I could fall asleep in the tub until there’s a knock on the door and Thorin peeks his head in.

              “Are you almost ready?” he wonders with an admiring glance at my naked body barely covered by the tub. I yawn largely and set my head back on the stone.

              “Almost. I have to slip something on and I should also put something on the bite,” I think out loud. I finish up washing and apply a paste that Thorin thought ahead to get. It stings, almost burns me as I first put it on but it’s better to be safe than sorry (especially here). I grimace as I wrap my arm, slip on a regular tunic and pants and am ready to go.

               The walk to the dining room makes me more tired with every step. I don’t know why but I feel worn out today from all of the brainwork earlier. I had to draw up so much energy during council to remember the laws, customs, and language differences that my brain is fried. _‘Does Thorin feel like this too?’_ I wonder quietly. I’m so tired that I nearly forget Jorah is behind me until I catch a glimpse of him in my periphery.

              “Will you be joining us Jorah?” I ask kindly but he shakes his head.

              “No I will take my leave when you enter and will be gone the rest of the evening unless you require my services,” he answers me stoically. I’m not sure why but his answer makes me feel wrong inside. The idea of ordering someone around makes my stomach turn.

              “Well, I’ll try not to get into more trouble today. And by the way, you did wonderfully with the snakes. Very well done,” I praise and I catch a hint of a smile on his heavily bearded face. The doors open to the dining room and I know it’s time to take my leave and wish Jorah a good night.

              “Clara!” I hear my name cheered by Bofur, Kili, Bombur, and Gloin, and see everyone else with a smile on their face at our entrance.

              “I’m sorry I’m late!” I apologize sheepishly.

              “What have you been up to lass? Woah! What happened to your arm there?” Gloin nods with his head while his facial expression and eyes squinted at my arm.

              “I helped wrangle some snakes from the stables and I got tagged by a few of the rat snakes. The one Thorin and Dwalin saw me grab was really gnawing on me,” I laugh with a wide smile. It only grows at their surprise and discomfort.

              “I didn’t know that you wrangled snakes,” Lena jokes from the end of the table. I shrug my shoulders at her.

              “Yeah! It’s was as thick as my arm!” I exaggerate in an Australian accent which only Lena really laughs to. “You wouldn’t know it but it was my first time too!” I say in my normal voice. I laugh and I nearly cackle at Thorin’s bewildered expression. “They were going to kill all of them so I had to do something!” I put my face in my hands and shake my head.

               Dwalin sighs disapprovingly. “I should tell Jorah to keep a better eye on you,” he mumbles and I giggle impishly.

               Lena suddenly straightens and leans forward towards me. “Did you hear about the mine accident?” she asks and I widen my eyes.

               The first thing I think of is Bofur and his workers. “No! Did something happen?” She nods her head with her eyebrows raised and eyes wide.

              “Yeah, I fell into a mineshaft last night so Harfur and Bofur had to pull me out.” I’m speechless. I can’t imagine how that must have been for her down in that dark shaft and how afraid she must have been. How did I not hear about this for nearly a day!

               “Oh my god! Are you okay? Did you get hurt when you fell? Why were you in the mines?” I rush out and she smiles.

               “Yeah, I’m okay and I wanted to see the mines. I don’t think we went the right way but I’m really glad Bofur was there,” she assures me, but I still feel very nervous for her.

               “Shall we finally eat?” Gloin grumbles and I laugh.

               “I didn’t know talking held up your stomach,” Kili jokes and I laugh along with him. The dinner is the dwarf classic of meat and potatoes like medieval times but it doesn’t take away how good it is to get something to eat for all of that energy. The thought pops in my head but I wonder if Thorin likes me this thin. I’m not as curvy or thick as when I started out on this journey or in this world, but I still think I’m beautiful enough. _‘I wonder how they like their women’_ I muse silently remembering that everyone in the mountain is a male. I push the thought out of my head and continue dinner.

                There are stories of their days from being settled to now and my face never drops its smile. I forgot how nice it was to be with the company constantly on the road. Now that I’m usually alone most of the day. It’s a bright bubble of joy inside my chest as I look at all of them. _‘My family.’_ Before it would have hurt to think of family but now it doesn’t. It’s comforting to know that they care and that they’re all my family now even if my old one is a world away.

               “And you should have seen his face when we were done!” Kili goes on with his fighting stories, “He was so angry he was nearly bursting at the ears!” Everyone laughs at what I can assume is the memory of the event and I laugh as well even though I wasn’t there.

                It feels like some hours pass before everyone starts to meander out of the dining hall and back to their chambers. Only a handful of dwarves are left in the dining hall, Thorin being one of them, and I’m so worried that I’ll fall asleep there if I stay another minute.

               “I’m heading to sleep fellas. Have a good night.” They wave back and I step out in the hall. _‘What a good day’_ I think with a smile on my face. The walk up to the room is silent but it’s no unwelcome as it helps settle my busy mind. The room is fairly quiet too despite the crackling of the fire. I take my shoes off, rubbing the balls of my feet as they ache. I take the time to unbandage my arm and look at it to find it’s already scabbed over and all that’s left are these cute little semi-circles on the top of my forearm. By the time I slip into bed I’m ready to fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillows.

                I’m woken up by someone sliding into bed behind me. I turn quickly to find a shirtless Thorin looking dead tired as well.

               “Go back to sleep,” he whispers as he places a kiss against my temple and puts his strong hands on my hips.

               “You do such a great job at being king,” I suddenly whisper into the darkness. The sentence hangs there for a moment while he processes it. “Everyone loves you, ya' know? I thought you should know that,” I finish with a tired smile. I get tugged even closer to his chest as a silent thank you.

               “I don’t believe anyone on the council will bother you for very long after today. The stable boys think highly of you too,” he adds. That makes my heart swell. “Why didn’t you tell me you were working there? Did you not trust me?” He sounds hurt by the thought and I shake my head.

                I think for a moment before I answer. “Everyone else had told me I didn’t belong there because I’m supposed to be a 'lady' but I don’t want to be one. I want to be respected but not just because of affiliation with you. I enjoy being a part of something, not sitting around sewing. You know me,” I nudge him a little.

               “Clara you surprise me at every turn. I know you, but for your safety and my sanity please,” he stresses, “be careful. For a moment I thought that snake was venomous and I nearly broke. You’re going to give me more white hairs than Fili and Kili put together,” he mumbles and I scoff. I turn in his arms to be face to face.

               “I promise to be careful and you’re right. I don’t enjoy being bitten by things anyway so I’ll try to stay away from the snakes. Just don’t forget that I’m pretty damn scrappy,” I smile and he scoffs.

               “Good.” The one word is both the beginning of tomorrow and the end of today. I make myself comfortable in his arms and close my eyes, hoping that tomorrow is as good as today was, and sink into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration for the snake:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/NzJkrLnHQDxzCgX1A
> 
> Clara's dress:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/jM2sYLhbvmxqoDun7
> 
> Kind of what Varis looks like:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/8Sedr88pH7GTeZNf6


	5. High How are You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is new news for Lena as she is spilled some beans about the future while Clara tires ditching her guard for the first time in order to spend time with her friend. Lena ends up getting herself into trouble as their luck is recently turning against them, but will Lena outlast this rough streak or will it be too much for her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> So I hope that you all enjoy this chapter because it'll end up being a two-parter of sorts. The chapters are most likely going to come slower as finals are crazy and stupidly difficult. I love the positivity of the story and definitely want everyone to enjoy it! Thank you so much for your wonderful comments that just lift my heart exponentially!  
> Thanks again to all of my readers and also to my own Lena! <3

**Chapter 5**

Lena POV

            It’s been nearly two weeks since the snow has stopped and the sun has come out from behind the clouds to melt the snow and light up the interior of the mountain with a warm glow. It’s gone into the wet season now with the caps of snow melting from the mountain sending nearly flood waters toward the valley for some badly needed growth. Harfur had gotten in trouble for the mine incident but had not been dismissed from guarding luckily. Now, Kili has been spending more time with me while Fili is swamped with duties. _‘I wonder what I can do that matters’_ I think with a sigh. Kili is plopped next to me with his hair still wild while we sit in the sun coming from one of the shafts cut into the mountain.

            “I wonder if everything will grow now that Smaug is gone and with all of the water coming down too?” Kili talks on and on to me like a never ending river! “What do you think you will be wearing at the ball in a few weeks? Are you excited to meet mother” he asks with newfound enthusiasm. I raise my eyebrows at that. _‘Mother? Here?’_

            Confusion hits me hard for a second and I feel put out as well. “Fili didn’t say anything about that,” I mutter in surprise and he whips his head toward me with his eyes wide open in his own form of surprise.

            “Well, of course, there is going to be a celebration after the coronation is complete for uncle,” he says as if I should already know this but this is all new to me. “You didn’t know?” His face goes pale and drops the happy expression as he realizes his mistake. “Uh oh.” He promptly stands up from his spot next to me and starts to walk away but I chase after him.

            “No, you don’t! Kili! What are you talking about?” I hound him but he sends me one look before pursing his lips and nearly sprints to avoid my grasp. “Kili!” I call as he books it out of the room. “Damnit,” I sigh. I have to find Fili.

            I travel through the hallways alone since Harfur had to be gone for the afternoon which left me with Kili as my so-called "guard". It’s been weeks since the last attack on us so it should be remotely safe but Harfur had to leave for an assignment and Kili had volunteered apparently. The halls are bustling like usual but unlike before the dwarves move out of my way as I walk through them and some even tilt their head at my presence. I head down to the forges where Fili is supposed to be learning and find furnaces as large as a house.

            “Oh my god,” I splutter as I take in the scene. White hot metal is everywhere and it’s so hot I’m afraid I’m going to spontaneously combust from it.  Sweat forms on my face immediately as it reminds me of Smaug’s fire. The furnace room is absolutely cavernous, just like in the movies how there are multiple levels and they all have another set of trollies attached to them. The good news is that I spot Fili near the entrance so I don’t have to travel further into the jungle of molten metal.

             He jogs toward me with a smile. “Lena what are you doing down here? Where’s Kee?” he asks but I have much more important questions for him after I recover from my shock.

            “Why didn’t you tell me your mother is on the way here?” I shoot back and his face falls. _‘That’s what I thought’_ I think sarcastically. “Kili apparently slipped up and told me about the caravan coming with your mother, the coronation later, and the celebration afterward,” I inform him and his expression turns to dread before firing back up into frustration. _‘At me?’_ I wonder for a second but then I think again.

            “You weren’t supposed to know about that until later,” he mutters and my eyes are wide at this sudden revelation His hands flail around for a moment before tightening in another form of frustration.

            I feel hurt by how reluctant he is to tell me anything even after I know. “When were you planning on telling me any of this? What when she was already here and, I don’t know, standing in front of me?” I ask. My tone is slowly rising in pitch and some of the other workers look at us having this little spat. He notices as well and takes my arm in his hot grip to move us out of hearing range.

            His face scrunches up as he tries to figure out how to calm me. “Lena I am sorry. I was going to tell you when she was closer to the mountain and I could give you an exact date of their arrival. The coronation, on the other hand, I did keep from you because there will be changes happening within the royal setting when Thorin officially takes the throne.” His tone is soft as he explains it to me but I feel hurt by this monkey wrench being thrown into our good system so far. “There will be even more politics than now, and you and Clara both have to be ready for it.” _‘Clara?’_

            “Does she not know about this either?” I ask, nearly accuse him, and he shakes his head.

            “But I’m sure she will now,” he sighs and rubs a hand over his face before taking my hands in his and squeezing tightly for a moment. “Please don’t worry about this Lena. Mother will love you, the politics will be fine, and I will still love you every second of the way,” he whispers and places a long kiss to our interlocked fingers. I nod my head and let it go for now still fully planning on telling Clara about this.

            I sigh and look down at my feet before giving in to his promise. “Alright, I trust you on this one. I’ll try not to worry about it but don’t assume that I can’t handle these things Fee. I can and it upsets me that didn’t trust me with this,” I answer quietly. His expression falls as he realizes his own mistake and I can’t help but feel a little bitter towards him. He straightens out his face after a few seconds and nods with newfound determination. We say our short goodbyes with parting kisses and then I take my time to think about where Clara might be. _‘The stables’_ I assume as it’s the first thing to come into my head.

            I walk even further down to the base of the mountain to try to find the stables but I think I’m turned around. The light is fading into dark the longer I walk so I turn around and walk the other direction in hopes that I find the right way. Apparently not. _‘This would have never happened if I still had Kili with me or Harfur’_ I silently berate myself. In my silent rambling I notice there’s one dwarf in sight that I feel like I’ve seen before but I’m not too sure.

            I jog a little to catch up with him. “Pardon me!” He turns his head and nods to me as a sign that he’s listening. “Do you know which direction the stables are?” He nods his head and then pauses as his eyes light up.

            He takes the time to bow lowly to me before smiling warmly. His hair is a sandy color with flecks of brown in it while it’s neatly pulled back into a single plait on his head with a metal headband and his beard pulled together in one rope with a solid bead holding it all together. “I do. You must be lady Lena. I was heading there now if you would like company on the way there. My name is Varis, my lady. You were very close but you might have missed a turn or two,” he adds softly. “I was joining lady Clara in the stables for her horse training.” _‘This must be the Varis she has been talking about!’_

            “You must be the same Varis that Clara tells me all about! I’d enjoy the company,” I say with a smile and begin walking. Varis has always been nice according to Clara. A pretty stand up dwarf in fact. “So out of curiosity where do you live here? I never hear much about other dwarves,” I wonder, hoping that I hadn’t offended him. “I mean they tend to either cozy up or keep their distance from me.”

            “I live close to the stables in case there are problems with the animals. There is a small block for us for the meantime until others come or want to take over our positions. We are only assigned to it because it was random among the soldiers,” he explains quietly.

            “Is there something else that you would rather do?” I ask him and his face lights up.

            “All dwarves have an affinity for stones and gems, but that doesn’t mean we all do the same tasks. I enjoy all crafts that I’m assigned to do but please do not misunderstand,” he says quickly. He looks almost scared for a second as we suddenly stop walking. “I greatly enjoy working with lady Clara but I do enjoy other trades as well,” he worries and I smile gently at him in understanding.

            “Not everyone likes working with animals as much as Clara does,” I mumble thinking of how often she finds herself covered in dirt or animal hair. He sighs in relief as his shoulders sag. There’s a smile playing at his lips at my comment about Clara and I know she must be just as dramatic and passionate with them as she is with me.

             “If you don’t mind me asking, what do you enjoy doing my lady?” he meekly asks from beside me. _‘He acts like I’ll bite his head off.’_

             “It’s alright to ask me, Varis. I promise I don’t mind. Well, I enjoy a lot of different trades. I enjoy making things work, figuring out what make things tick like machines. I enjoy books, and I also enjoy helping others. I like being useful and having a skill that’s helpful to the people around me,” I reflect, realizing how true it is. “I want a place in society just like everyone does.” He’s silent before nodding thoughtfully and we continue our walk in silence.

             The hallways are larger down here and are more cave like than the others. They open into the stables that take my breath away. The beautiful wood that lines the pens with the wrought iron spun delicately along with large iron bolts to hold it there. These animals themselves are beautiful! They’re all so big and strong with beautiful coats and giant heads on them all.

            “They’re so beautiful!” I say in awe. Not to anyone in particular but to myself mostly. “Are these rams?” Varis nods his head and brings one over with a flick of his hand. I stick my hand through, copying him, and feel the soft fur under my fingertips.

            “These are our battle rams that we train, although lately they have been growing restless with the changing weather. They’re used to more riding than of late,” he comments with a glance toward the doors and I widen my eyes in surprise as I take my hand back. _‘You can do what with them?’_

            “You can ride them?” I’m astonished at this even though I thought it was possible here and I saw them during the battle but it’s still shocking nonetheless. They’re much larger than any rams I’ve ever seen even in pictures or stuffed at museums. They’re practically the size of horses!

            “Well you can but you probably shouldn’t ride him.” I whip around to find Clara standing there holding another ram that’s nearly the same size as if it’s the simplest thing in the world. “He’s a bit touchy at times. He only likes the men even after I’ve been trying to train him for a while,” she shrugs. “It’s alright I guess. So what’s up with you?” Varis takes this as his que to leave with a simple nod in my direction.

            “So there’s a bit of a surprise that I’m going to tell you and I don’t want you to freak out,” I tell her and she slows down putting the ram away.

            She gives me a cautious look. “Okay I’ll try not to. I guess you’re going to tell me no matter what so shoot.”

            _‘Here it goes.’_ “So according to Kili there is going to be a coronation.” Her eyes widen comically.

           “Oh?” She stops what she’s doing.

           “And there is going to be a celebration afterward, like a ball-,” she cuts me off again.

           “Oh?” she says again louder and locks the pen with a jerky motion.

           “And so, um, Fili and Kili’s mom is traveling here and is going to be here very soon apparently for all of it,” I finish with a small voice.

           “What the fuck!” she whispers dramatically horrified with her eyes wider than before. “Oh my—FUCK!” she blurts loudly with a raise of her eyebrows. That one turns a few heads, animals and dwarves alike, and even makes Jorah look over at us from the entrance with his black braids swinging with the suddenness of it. “Sorry,” she waves to him before turning back to me. “When?”

           “Fili said maybe within the next week or two. I just figured out like less than an hour ago,” we move away from the pens to talk a little more quietly. “Do you want to go to the room of requirements?” She takes a second to peek over at Jorah before nodding her head.

           “We can try but I have to leave Jorah a note or something so he doesn’t freak out.” She sighs and runs her hand through her hair. “He’ll probably freak out and try to find me anyway,” she sighs again. “Give me a second.”

            I’m confused as she walks over to Jorah, talks to him for a second before he walks off. Next, she sneaks over to her small bag to pull out a slip of paper and a piece of coal to write a small note. After she’s done, she picks up her bag, places the note on the stool and runs toward me waving frantically. _‘So dramatic’_ I huff silently. We make it out of the rear entrance of the stables and head up the long walk to our hideout.

           “What did the note say?” I pant as we continue our long climb.

           “It basically said ‘Sorry for sneaking off but I’ll be back within two hours. Look for me then’ and whatnot,” she pants back. Once we reach the top of the staircase we sneak around the upper level before turning down the nearly hidden hall. It feels like we haven’t been here in so long since we got guards and since we have been so busy finding our own place in Erebor but now it feels like coming into a second home.

           The bright spring light gleams through the window, highlighting the light stone and I itch to feel the warm wood under my feet rather than the cold stone of the lower levels. I tug my boots off and put them to the side with a thump. Clara immediately goes to one of the longer couches to lay down on a let her own feet hang over the armrest.

           “What do you think their mom looks like? Do you think she looks like Thorin or his brother?” she wonders quietly and I shrug my shoulders.

           I take my time dragging my feet and plop onto the next nearest couch. “I don’t know. I’m just upset that Fili didn’t trust me enough to tell me. He’d rather keep it a secret and I know it’s because he didn’t want to stress me out but it’s stressing me out!” I rush out and cover my face with my arms as I flop onto my back.

           “So do you think we’ll get crowns or tiaras or something?” she asks again and I sigh loudly.

           “I don’t know!” I exclaim as my frustration and annoyance build up into one big burst ready to be released like a volcano.

           “Then just say what you’re thinking!” she bursts back angrily.

           “I want a crown that has beautiful crystals and pretty patterns on it!” I yell back and now it’s mainly for the purpose of yelling rather than being angry. “I would like it because it would be like being a princess.”

           “Okay. Well, I’m worried about the day that Thorin is going to send up the bat signal and ask me to step up as a queen or something,” she whines. “I’m really nervous about all of this! I’m also worried that if Dís doesn’t like me then she’ll grind me into dust or something. Oh god, what is happening to our lives!”

           “This is a good thing though. We’re doing things with our lives that matter and we’re literally living in a real kingdom!” Every time I say that out loud I give myself goosebumps. The thought of actually being in a kingdom that’s rolling in riches, hot dwarves, and lots of danger. What a way to live.

            Clara shifts her position on the couch to twist on her stomach and look at me lazily. “So are you alright with Fili about this or are you going to have long talks into the night about him keeping secrets from you?”

            I give a big sigh. “I’m probably going to talk to him about this later and try to get more information about his mom and what she’s like. Seriously if she’s anything like Thorin when we first met him then she’s going to pound me into the ground for even looking at her baby.” Clara groans.

           “Unsurprisingly, I have the same feeling. I’m going to let Thorin know that I know about this too. I hope that he hasn’t been keeping this from me too.”

           I breathe in the clear air of this warm sun filled room, and since we’ve cleaned a little, it’s really started to feel roomy. We stay here in the warmth and light for a little while longer, chatting and letting it lapse into silence before we get the feeling enough time has passed since we first came up here, and there is only enough time before we have to head back. We have to head back soon but I’m dreading every moment of it because of the pressures to fit in. Harfur should be back for the afternoon and will probably be looking for me too.

           The walk down feels longer for some reason like we’re heading back down into the dark of societies dungeon. We get to the royal wing after a quick debate on which direction to go and I decide this is the time to part ways with Clara. I hope that she doesn’t get in trouble for ditching Jorah but I’m glad that we did it. It barely feels like we get time with each other since we both have our different appearances in court (mine being about as boring as Clara’s) and without being on the quest pushing us together we just never find the time to check in. It’s like being swept up in a whirlwind without the clear sky in sight.

              As I walk into my room I expect to find Fili there but it’s empty and silent. I never get used to this. The feeling of emptiness in such a large room that has other rooms in it. It might as well be an apartment rather than a suit with how many doorways there are and other spaces to seclude yourself from other people. I notice there’s a cart in what looks like an office space with a desk and some papers along with an inkwell, but what really intrigues me are the bottles. They have deep amber colored liquid in one and another bottle with clear liquid. I walk over and pull out the stopper of the amber one and lean over to smell it when I'm nearly knocked off my feet.

             “Holy shit!” I cry out instinctively. The smell of the liquor is so strong it’s nearly curling the hairs inside of my nose and reaching into my lungs with a vengeance. I quickly put the cork back into the bottle and let my lungs breathe some clean air before cautiously moving to the next bottle. This one smells more like sweet vodka, almost like candied fruit in a way, so I reach for a golden cup on the side and tentatively pour myself a bit. As I drink it, it tastes like vodka but doesn’t burn as much so I pour myself some more while I wait for Fili to come back and rest myself on the couch in front of the fire.

             It feels like time is slipping as I sit there and drink. It’s as if my cup is never empty and my mind is never settled. The level of my drink never increases any higher but my anger sure does. _‘Where the hell is he?’_ I wonder drunkenly. _‘He should have been back by now.’_ I set down my glass to wobble to my feet, stumbling to the door where I leave the room in a hurry to get down to the forges and Fili.

             My vision is swimming as I descend the stairs on my shaking legs and feel the cool railings under my hands. I blink and I’m suddenly set in front of a split in the path with both of them leading into the darkness. _‘What the hell? Which way do I go?’_ I ask myself. I don’t remember being here before when I came down earlier. I try to look at each path but they swim even more the longer I stand still, forcing to make a decision in the moment.

             I take the path toward the right, feeling like it’s the right path but then again the other way felt right. The light grows darker and darker the further down I go. I continue putting one foot in front of the other as the green stone fades leaving an uneven dirt path as my only way to go.

             My footing slips on some of the loose dirt and my feet stumble as I can’t walk any further on the uneven ground. I can only take one more step before I fall on my face into something brown and clumpy sending a cloud of smoke or dust into the air and whooshing past my face. The thing feels paper-like against my fingers so I recoil from the foreign object and the smell of rotting material near my face.

             I try to breathe through the dust but it coils its way into my lungs making me cough horribly. _'OUT OUT OUT!'_ My brain is screaming at me and my internal alarms are going off telling me I have to get out of the danger zone. When I finally regain my footing I stumble my way back up the tunnel, nearly running in my search for fresh air instead of sitting and waiting for the dust to settle, but the cloud feels like it’s sticking to me as I run. _‘What the hell is this?’_

             The stone comes back under my feet but I know there’s something wrong with me the further I go. My stomach is turning the longer it takes me to get out of the unfamiliar area and my skin feels slick with sweat not from exersion. The light of the torches and lamps distorts like how images refract on spoons as I start to run, more like wobble, my way back up the stairs to the royal wing, but I don’t think I’m going to make it. I feel it in my toes and my fingertips, the way my head feels like heavy weights are being placed on it, and how my mind feels as though it’s being peeled back like layers of onions as I lose more control over myself. So, in short, I’m freaking out.

             “Clara!” I yell the moment I reach her door as I gather my strength for one big knock but only manage for one slap against the heavy door before I slump against the door jamb and cry. Everything feels like I’m on the open ocean in a small boat while waves pound on me over and over. I let out one sob and before I know it there’s another and another and another coming out of my mouth while the waves become rougher, my stomach drops and curls, and images become more broken. I can barely think straight thoughts as it’s like grabbing onto fraying threads. It’s like a mixture of a lava lamp, Van Gogh, and Picasso flashing before my eyes like a carousel.

              I blink and Thorin’s face appears right in front of my like magic. “Lena!” Thorin yells and the waves suddenly stop but his face is still distorted with eyes two different sizes and every hair on his beard swirling like seaweed. “Lena, what is it? What’s wrong? Clara get over here now!” he calls into the room before he turns his face back toward me. His words are clear but I can't stop myself long enough to answer him.

            “Thorin what is it-,” Clara stops talking suddenly and I start to worry again what she must be thinking as the world spins under me violently. “Hey there sweetie,” she greets softly as I feel hands descend on me and pat down to my hands where the pressure is firm and calming, “we’re going to get you help and you’re gonna be alright. I promise.” The clump of worry in my chest dissolves instantly at that and I quiet down even though my vision is still distorted and the subtle waves are rocking me gently. “Did you drink something funny? Did you eat something funny? Just nod or shake your head for me.”

             I nod my head and then set it against her shoulder that acts as my anchor. I only blink once more before I’m surrounded by other people. The most I can tell that are around me are Fili, Oin, Thorin, and Clara standing and kneeling in various positions while I’m still on the ground now lying on my side. _'When did I get on my side?'_  The green of the stone is like looking at a disco ball while the light off of the fire is like tiny people belly dancing.

             “Don’t you shut those eyes now lass, you hear me?” Oin speaks up and the first moment I recall is on the battlefield with Fili telling me not to fall asleep. The world actually rocks under me as I’m lifted off of the ground and the next moment we’re nearly running through the halls. There’s a deep seated tugging under the rocking that reminds me of the tugging while I was dying. _‘Am I dying?’_

             “No, you’re not dying, you're high,” Clara says suddenly, although she sounds far away to my ears. _‘Did I say that out loud?’_ I wonder faintly. It’s like my lips are detached from my body as I feel them moving over and over again. “Lena settle down.” That comes like a reprimand.

             “Feels like I’m dying,” a small voice says and I don't know who said it but I can’t help it. I repeat the phrase again and to my own ears it sounds small but the vibrations in my chest make me think again.

             “Lena, you’re doing great but you need to take a deep breath and relax. You're not dying, you're high,” Clara tells me again. My lips stop and purse together at the gentle order. I look up and see golden hair, hair as golden as the sun and it is shining so brightly.

             “I’m floating away,” I hear someone whisper quietly as I feel this separation from my body like a split between body and mind. I’m alone suddenly, standing and turning to see myself being carried and surrounded by the little group that found me and being put down onto a bed in a large open room. _‘What is this?’_ Second me is lying on a cot while others sit around me and Oin bustles around the room gathering supplies. When I turn around I see a third version of myself holding something that looks like a brown paper ball with some type of cloud coming out of it. “Be careful next time,” the other me whispers in my face before I snap back to my own body lying on the soft cot.

             It feels like my ears are stretching out to hear the noise coming from the others. “-should be fine,” one voice says but I don’t turn my head. There’s a feeling of warmth on the bed that grows and reminds me of an electric blanket that’s going too high until you want to kick it off but it engulfs me whole as I slip into sleep.

**Third Person POV**

“You need to get her on a bed now!” Oin calls as the train of people pile into the room. Lena hangs limply in Thorin’s arms, dazed out of her mind. The old healer runs over to his cabinet of herbs to help mix something to wake Lena back up from her drugged state but the minute she touches the sheets behind her back there is a discolored liquid spewing from her mouth.

            “OIN!” Clara cries as she runs over to her friend, tipping her over on her side to avoid choking on vomit. “I think she fell in something! Uh-oh-um,” she tries to come up with anything like what’s covering Lena’s body and the notecards in her brain are flipping as furiously they possibly can until she lands on either the possibility of a very large flower or a mushroom. _‘Damnit!’_ she mentally screams. “She said she drank something or ate something, probably both, um, what the hell are you high on?” she wonders out loud. "Fili you have booze in your room right? Fili?" she snaps again.

            "Yes we do," he answers before Oin comes barrling over with an arm full of medicine.

            “I need you to move out of my way lass!” Oin commands but Clara would rather fight off an army of goblins to stay with her friend now. “Thorin, I need her out of my way,” he says to Thorin but as he takes one step forward Clara pins him with a look from hell. The look she gives him is deadly enough that he freezes for a second.

           The image of her standing over Lena, who is jerking and spitting up vomit, glaring at him as though he’s her enemy on the battlefield is one that makes him disregard Oin’s order for fear of being ripped apart by his rabid lover. Never in the entire time that he’s known her has she looked like that. It causes a single shiver to ripple up his spine that, for once, he listens to and stays back.

            Fili hovers around the end of the bed afraid of touching any part of Lena in case that suddenly makes her worse, but he nods to Clara's question a little late. “What’s happening to her?" When no one answers him he feels the fear and worry gather in his eyes as stinging tears. "What is happening Uncle!” he demands an answer as he takes in the frightening scene with Lena on her side with her back toward him, not knowing what will happen to her next. Thorin snaps out of his own reverie and takes hold of his nephew’s shoulders to keep him from getting in the way. It also serves as a firm hug that helps combat tears.

            _‘Take a breath everyone’_ Clara thinks to herself as Lena settles down suddenly. She takes her own deep breath before turning to Fili. “Well, she reeks of booze so that'll probably be a part of it. She threw up the rest of the drink and whatever she took, accidentally or purposefully," she matches Fili's gaze, "is just going to take time to wear off. Long story short, she’ll be fine.” Fili still looks high strung with panicky eyes and his mouth gaping like a fish even after she’s done explaining though. “Oin, do you have any sedatives?” she calls from the bedside. The healer looks at her for a moment before nodding.

           "Wait, why are you giving her that?" Fili's not a small dwarf but he feels like one at this point and his voice reflects his inner fears. He feels like a child, helpless and fearful.

           "It's fine Fili. It's so she doesn't have a harder time than she needs to and to help her relax while she comes down," she answers.

            They make sure all of the vomit is clear from her airway before pouring the sedative down her throat and leaving her to calm down on her own while she comes down from her unwilling high. “Fili,” Clara calls from the bedside and she nods to Thorin to let him go. “Go get some water and rags to help wipe her face off a little, yeah?” The blonde nods shakily before walking to the other end of the room to fetch the supplies.

            “What will happen now?” she asks Oin as quietly as she dares while she’s hoping for the best. She doesn't know any of this for sure, so everything she's doing is a team effort.

            “Now we wait for whatever’s in her system to clear itself out and keep her as comfortable as we can.” _‘That’s not very comforting’_ she thinks with a frown. Lena lies there unmoving but opening her eyes every minute or two which Clara takes as a good sign. Clara hides her displeasure at Oin's answer as Fili returns over with the supplies and without ado begins cleaning Lena’s face and neck of the pungent vomit. When she's touched by the cold rags she closes her eyes as she must be going along with the sedative.

             Once she’s as clean as she can be, the atmosphere in the room deflates like a popped balloon, finally letting everyone breathe through the tension that had built up before. Fili wastes no time pulling up a chair and posting himself at her side like a guard while Clara rests her head against Thorin’s. The sigh that everyone was holding is let go and all that is left to do is wait to see if she'll really be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration for the mushrooms:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/qoTZg6hgUKUfG2V79
> 
> Inspiration for the infirmary:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/sh75vP4t5jZGyq9R8


	6. One and Only

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A mix of Clara and Lena with their dwarves but Lena confesses her nightmares to Fili who in turn helps her, while Clara and Thorin work out a few issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Well, no super long message this time but then again. . . Enjoy the story and spread the love! Thanks for all of the comments and kudos on this and just remember I always love more ideas for the story!  
> Thanks again! <3

**Chapter 6**

**Third Person POV**

         The infirmary remains silent as Lena lies in one of the beds lining the sides of the hall with Fili at her right side holding her hand, Kili on the other, and Clara at the end of her bed with Thorin holding her own hand. The rest of the company is scattered around the room in chairs and sitting on other beds waiting for her to wake up or to potentially turn for the worst. _'T_ _hat was too close’_ Clara thinks with a sigh.

          Lena’s breaths sound tormented as they rattle on the inhale and wheeze on the way out. Oin said she’ll be fine with some rest and lots of hydration but it would ultimately take time for the spores to wear off, not that his good prognosis meant they wouldn't be worried. It wasn't expected for them all to gather around her like she is dying.

         “You’re sure she’s going to be alright?” Fili asks the old healer again. Oin raises his grey eyebrows and looks at the sleeping Lena again with another calculating glance and back to Fili with annoyance.

         “Fili, lad, I’ve told you already that she will be fit as a fiddle in no time. Give her time to wake up and recover.” He sends one more tired glare at the blonde with a beard before cleaning up the infirmary back to his strict standards. The silence is almost suffocating as they listen to her ragged breathing in the room, waiting for her to suddenly (or magically) wake up.

          Some of the company decides to leave after an hour or so, leaving only the closest to her sitting around the bed. “Clara?” Ori voices timidly from one of the side beds while his brothers turn and wait for him to leave. She turns her eyes to the small redhead with a blank look on her face that shows just how tired she really is.

         Clara sighs and tugs Thorin’s hand from her own before sitting down next to Ori a bit away from the group. “Yeah? What's up?"

         “What did she mean by dying? What does. . . dying. . . feel like? She won't die, will she?” he wonders and even though he’s quiet everyone left in the room turns their heads toward the conversation to hear the answer straight from the horse’s mouth.

           In truth, there was nothing for her. There was no going home, no other people, no bright white light that everyone talks about being in the great beyond, and there felt like there was no closure for her until she was sent back to her new family. It makes her shiver to wonder if it had only happened to her and not Lena or anyone else, hoping it was just her. She runs her fingers through her hair and tugs at the strands as she tries to come up with an answer that is anything but the truth.

          “Ori, she's not going to die. She was out of her mind but she's not going to die. Do you want an answer now?” Ori nods slowly with a wary look around before looking down at his hands shyly. “Dying-It’s uh-,” _‘terrifying, horrifying’_ “-definitely a unique experience,” she answers slowly as she remembers the tugging against her back, more like yanking now that she thinks about it, but everyone continues to stare. She puts on a smile to get everyone to relax but it feels forced even to her. “I mean you don’t have any say in it so you just go with the flow however it happens,” she hums lightly before shifting uncomfortably.

          “Ori, that’s enough,” Dori snaps and Ori recoils but Clara comes in to rescue him.

          “No, it’s alright Dori. I just don’t talk about it often that’s all,” she tries to cover but she feels uncertainty weigh heavily on her because of what they might ask. “Well more like I’ve never talked about it,” she amends and looks at the floor. “It’s not too scary if that’s what you’re wondering,” she whispers just quietly enough to Ori so no one else will hear. She looks right at Ori with that and he nods in acknowledgment.

           Kili perks up from Lena’s side. “Did you see the halls of Mandos?” he whispers to her. Everyone looks hopefully at her in hope that she might say and exceed their expectations of the afterlife. _‘Lie’_ her brain tells her.

 _‘No’_ “Well-,” she tries to soften the blow, “-That is what I’m not going to tell you.” _‘Because there was nothing’_ she tries to tune out her thoughts. “I won’t spoil it for you so, let’s leave it at that,” she huffs with a smile and luckily Kili accepts that without a fuss.

          “Now, she doesn’t need all of you here at the same time,” Oin bustles through the crowd to shoo everyone out except for Fili. They decided earlier that if she didn’t wake up right away then they would take shifts with Kili being second, Clara third, and then Fili fourth before asking anyone else to sub in for them. Fili was adamant to remain there the entire time though despite taking more shifts and barely sleeping.

           Clara decides to retreat back to bed with Thorin for a little while before her shift. The thought of crawling back under the covers to try and get their earlier warmth back from before makes her shiver. _‘Damnit, this was the one night he had come to bed early’_ she thinks sourly. As the two slowly walk back to their chambers Thorin looks over at her questioningly a few times in a row, admiring everything about her, her posture, her unique look, and the way she looks ready to fall into his arms.

          All of the sideways glances don't escape Clara's notice. “Alright what is it?” Clara questions with only a hair of annoyance in her tone. This is the third time she’s caught him looking over at her and she can barely keep her composure with his eyes roaming her over like he’s starving but holding back in one way or another.

          “How did you know she was drugged, or well ‘high’ as you call it?” he wonders lowly. Clara smiles as a light blush covers her cheeks thinking about the abundance of funny drug related stories from her life before Middle Earth. _‘Beautiful’_ a voice in the back of Thorin's mind whispers as he practically breathes in every part of her. She makes him want her at every second by simply being in the same proximity as him. She does it without even knowing!

          “Well, at school, people decide to do drugs and you end up running into someone who is high at one point or another. I met someone who had taken mushrooms and she was practically knocked flat on her ass the whole time. She sat herself down in front of a towel and stared at it for like six hours straight,” she laughs a little at the memory. Thorin’s gaze is questioning when he hears that.

           “Did that happen to her as well then?” he asks about the friend in relation to Lena but Clara shakes her head.

           “She was fine because she took less than Lena did but Lena had that same look in her eyes like she was seeing something other than what was in front of her. The throwing up and the seizing is a side effect of taking too much. That happens with a lot of other drugs so you just have to work them through it and get them help if you have to,” she explains. Thorin nods at this new knowledge but sees her in a different light. One that shows she’s much more than a pretty face, that there’s more than meets the eye.

           “Did you ever participate in taking these 'drugs'?" he wonders out of curiosity. The snort and smirk he gets in response tells him his answer before she does.

           "Oh no," she drawls out dramatically before shooting him a quick wink. "Me? Participate in something so societally unacceptable? What ever would my parents say?" she chortles as he smirk grows wider.

           "Were you studying to be a healer then?” he pries as they reach the room.

           “Nope,” she pops the ‘p’ with her lips. “I enjoy working with animals more because they don’t talk back. No, my parents were both healers of sorts so I learned from them and then the rest I learned from my own curiosity and research,” she shrugs her shoulders at the end. _‘Beautiful and clever’_ he appraises her, watching her strip her robe, revealing her in her nightclothes to his admiring gaze. The shapely curve of her hips meeting her strong torso covered in the beautiful silk gown takes his breath away as if it’s the first time seeing her.

            She can feel his eyes on her as she takes off her robe, letting him see her and allowing him to drink her in like how plants absorb sunlight. As she settles herself in the soft bed, the other side of the bed dips as Thorin comes in and puts himself next to her. _‘This is the best time to mention it’_ she thinks with some trepidation.

            “I heard your sister is almost here, that she’ll be here in about a week or two. She’ll be here to see the coronation that I had no idea about,” she explains slowly and when she feels him shift behind her she holds her breath for the excuse of why she wasn’t told.

            “Did Fili tell you?” he responds in equal volume. Clara can heart the reluctance in his voice and almost doesn’t want to turn around to look at his expression.

            “Kili told Lena, Lena checked it with Fili, and then she told me where I kind of. . .freaked out,” she whispers into the open air in front of her. She turns in his arms and looks into his dark blue eyes that are trying to figure her out. There’s a part of her that wants him to be so understanding of her but she knows with how differently they were raised, their age difference, and so many other variables he may not understand why she would react poorly. “I also slipped my detail today for a little while but the important thing is that I came back,” she stresses to him with a tight smile.

            “I am very well aware that you avoided your guard today. I heard about it from Dwalin, of all people, when he saw Jorah without you. I also did not want you to worry about the coronation and the politics that come with it until I knew more about how you would react,” he sighs heavily and hugs her closer as he kisses her cheek.

            “That’s what Lena told me Fili’s reasoning was too. I’m just upset that you didn’t trust me enough with this Thorin. I understand, I really do, just don’t let your sister crush me or anything when she gets here. I’m more afraid of her than of the politics,” Clara chuckles and Thorin scoffs merrily at her before kissing her forehead.

            “She frightens me as well if it makes you feel any better,” he chuckles back to her. “Dis is just as strong-headed as any dam but she is a kind hearted mother and sister.”

            Clara’s smile drops for a moment as the mood settles down even more. “Thank you. Just tell me the truth next time. I can’t promise you that I’ll be calm the entire time but please don’t leave me out.” Thorin’s face levels out as he nods in agreement. _‘Anything for you amrâlimê.’_

            There’s a long beat of silence where Clara closes her eyes and moves to her back, ready to sleep but Thorin’s brain is still buzzing like a swarm of bees. He opens his mouth, about to ask her something but he closes his mouth before he can make a sound. He does this a few more times before he strokes her face to gain her attention.

            “Was what you said about dying true?” he questions with a deep seeded curiosity and Clara’s eyes fly open as she turns toward him again in shock. _‘That was out of left field’_ she thinks surprised.

            There’s a beat of silence as she panics, not knowing what to say to him and caught between wanting to lie to protect him but wanting to tell him the truth that’s eating her up. “Not fully,” she whispers to him. "No." Which earns him widening his eyes. The silence between them is like a second blanket over her, allowing her to feel as though she can express anything to her partner.

            “Um. . . It’s terrifying, horrifying, honestly. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. I was terrified. When I think back I mean I guess there’s no reason to stress about it in the end. It’s a waste of effort if you do,” she chuckles nervously although there's no smile on her face. “I don’t want to talk about it, what happened. Ever really,” the shy girl whispers, avoiding his gaze before closing her own eyes and reaching out to him in the dark. "I'm sorry if I've ruined the mood."

             There's a beat she's worried he may not say anything until he locks his fingers with hers. “Do not be. I asked. Although I may not say it often enough, know that I love you dearly.” Clara is frozen for a moment before she smiles sweetly toward him.

             “Even though I may say it too much, know that I love you just as much.”

              Although he's trying to get rid of the sick feeling in his stomach, he believes she’s telling the truth about dying. Thorin takes this cue to re-roll Clara onto her back and curl up against her under their heavy covers before trying to get enough sleep for the next day. Clara, on the other hand, tries for sleep in the short time until her shift, wanting to get back and see how Lena is doing.

            Back in the infirmary, Fili is holding onto Lena’s hand like his lifeline. Her knuckles are resting by his mouth as he places intermittent kisses against them. Oin had tried to tell him to leave but he refused every time. He keeps telling him he wanted to be there when she wakes up, even taking it as far to doze off in the chair while making sure to keep a grip on her cooler hand.

            “I am so afraid of losing you,” he whispers into her hand as his eyes burn with tears. The second that she had starting jerking in the bed, vomiting, he had felt his heart stop from the fear and stress of it all and the fear of losing her, of letting her slip right through his fingers without anything he could do to stop it.

            “How is she doing?” Clara asks and startles him out of his trance. He looks up at her more rested face before turning back to Lena’s sleeping one.

            “Hasn’t woken up yet, still,” he slightly slurs from exhaustion. She nudges his shoulder and he rolls his shoulders back to keep himself awake.

            “She’ll be okay, Fili. You heard what Oin said that it takes time. I know you want to be here when she wakes up but at least go and sleep on one of the beds in here and if you get yelled at for that then I will stay here to keep watch while you go and get sleep in your own bed. It’ll be okay.” His eyes are drooping as she talks until she taps on his shoulder again.

            “You’re right. I should get some sleep but I. . .” he sighs heavily at the helplessness crushing him.

            “I promise it’ll be okay. Get some sleep and I’ll take over, and I’ll wake you up if there are any changes.” Fili nods his head as he drifts over to another bed in the infirmary to crash on.

            A few hours later Lena starts to shift in the bed feeling like her mouth is filled with cotton and her brain is all scrambled from what happened but her memories are clear. She remembers the distorted lights and how Thorin’s eyes were different sizes, and especially how there were multiple hers staring at the one her in the bed. _‘Mushrooms?'_ she wonders lightly as she can practically feel the papery shells under her fingers. A hand squeezes her own so she turns her head only to get blinded for a second by the light of torches and candles near a table.

            “Hey there honey,” Clara coos quietly, looking over her shoulder for a moment before turning back to her friend. Lena cranes her neck to the side to see what she’s looking at and spots Fili sleeping on the bed next to her like a baby. His hair is splayed on the tough pillow under him and he’s sleeping above the covers close to the edge where his right leg is hanging off and his face in her direction.

            She smacks her lips together trying to get moisture back into her mouth but Clara brings her relief in cool water from a pitcher on a side table. “What happened?” she croaks roughly as she tries to focus on Clara’s face. She tries to sit up but her arms feel like lead.

            “Yeah I wouldn’t do that yet,” she chuckles lightly. “You’re in the infirmary. You had a nasty trip and with whatever you drank plus being covered in mushroom spores, Oin had to help you get down from it here. You were literally higher than the sky. You must have gotten a major hit,” Clara explains quietly. _‘oh’_ Lena blanches.

            “What time is it?” she wonders out loud. Clara puts down the pitcher and cup as she shifts in the bedside chair. The bags under her eyes look like they’re continuing to grow every minute she stays awake.

            “It’s sometime early in the morning like four or five. Do you want me to wake Fili up?” she tries to whisper as quietly as possible to avoid waking Fili up in case they don’t want to do that yet. Lena nods her head.

            Clara scoots over to the other bed and gently shakes Fili’s arm. He jolts awake with a panicked expression and immediately looks over to Lena's bed but as soon as he spots her awake he lets out a relieved sigh. “I’m going to head back to bed before sunrise so I’ll talk to you later honey.” She waves one more time before her heels click on the way out of the infirmary.

            “How are you feeling amrâlimê? Do you need more water? Should I call for Oin?” he rushes out as he cups her face with his warm hands. She gets a sudden sense of déjà vu like falling and being pushed into yourself at the same time where she remembers the light surrounding Fili from her high state. _‘He’s gorgeous’_ she wonders silently. “Lena?” he shakes her a little, focusing her attention again.

            “More water would be great, and I just want to get out of here Fee,” she tells him tiredly even after being asleep for a while. She can tell it's been a while by how she feels sticky, her face is oily, and her hair is messy and unkempt on the pillow.

            Fili frowns at her tone and how sad she looks. “Here then,” he compromises. “Drink this while I send for Oin, then you can come back with me once you’re cleared.” She nods her head while she gratefully accepts the water from him.

            “I’m sorry about all of this,” she whispers suddenly. “I was looking for you when I got lost. You weren’t back from the forges and I had tried one of the drinks in the other room then I went to find you and you know the rest,” she trails off nervously.

            “I am simply glad that you aren’t harmed and now I know that you should have a guard at all times. You and Clara attract more trouble than me and Kili,” he scoffs. “And we have plenty of trouble following us around anyway,” he laughs fully this time. The door creaks open and the old healer walks into the room with a quick eye to check Lena out before even getting up to her bed.

            “You look like you’re doing well. Any pain in your head, odd visions, or difficulty breathing?” She shakes her head no while he checks her pulse and looks into her eyes. “Well then I’d say that you are healed enough to leave but if you feel out of sorts then you come right back here. Take it easy for a day or two,” he points his finger at her and with one final nod, just like that, she’s cleared. _‘It’s nice here without all of the paperwork’_ she thinks with an internal smile.

            Fili forgoes letting her try to walk as he picks her up bridal style and carries her all the way back to the room, not stopping until he reaches the master bathroom. “I want to spend the day with you. Once we both get more sleep I mean,” he smirks at his own half joke.

            “But what about your meetings and other important stuff you need to do?” she questions him as he places her on the edge of the tub but he shakes his head and shushes her. The sound of running water fills the room soon, echoing over and across the stone surfaces until it’s steamy and almost too warm for her liking.

            “I am going to take off from those for the day to watch over you and we can talk later about all of the dangers that you seem to attract since you’ve moved into the mountain. I love you with all of my heart Lena. I want to make sure that I live with you at every opportunity, not simply live in proximity to you,” he whispers finally, placing a kiss on her lips with the utmost tenderness. Her lips are chapped against his but it still makes his breath hitch and his excitement flare. “Now hop in with me and we can get all the dirt off of you.”

            “Wait, wait, I won’t get infected from these. . .spores again?” she wonders and he shakes his head.

            He pulls his tunic over his head revealing his broad chest that takes her breath away every time. “No, they’re dried and dead by now so they are simply dust covering you.” He waves her to stand up as he then helps her out of my own tunic, even tugging the tired girl close by her pant strings with a tired chuckle of his own. _‘Ever the loving lover’_ Lena basks in his attention like a snake under a heat lamp and the feel of him against her pelvis.

            They both climb into the cavernous tub where he wipes down every surface and facet of her skin and wiping away every trace of her accident until only her fair skin is showing. His rough hands make her skin tingle and spark like watching a sparkler in slow motion. He washes her hair and massages her scalp, rubs the tension out of her shoulders, but makes sure that she doesn’t fall asleep in the tub. _‘The last emergency we need’_ he thinks as he kisses down the side of her neck as he wraps his arms around her waist.

            “I was so afraid that I was going to lose you, Lena. I don’t think that you realize how much I love you and how long it feels like I have waited for you.” His voice is reverent as he kisses her shoulders, letting her lean against his chest. “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever had the honor of laying my eyes on.”

             The room starts to light up as the sun begins to peak over the horizon and come through the shafts in the mountainside, and that’s when she knows it’s time. They get out only to haphazardly dry off and meander into the main area where, without a second thought, she reaches for Fili’s sleeping tunics and tugs the too big garment on.

             The look of the short but baggy tunic on her makes him shiver with desire despite his tired state. “I love the way you look in my clothes. The way you strut around the room with your exquisite legs and that beautiful ass on you,” he whispers huskily from the end of the bed making her shiver and smirk at his bold words in return.

            “Get over here so we can get up and do all of that fun stuff that you want like have sex the majority of the day and I can drink more water oh and eat!” she emphasizes with a wide-eyed expression. Fili laughs at that part while she continues, “And we can try to see how I can stay out of trouble, but I’m leaning more toward having lots of mind blowing sex with you and maybe drinking more of that lovely liquor,” she finishes with a smirk.

            He groans and grips her hips so she will be closer to him. “I look forward to that.” He kisses her lips on final time before turning her back to him and molding his hard body to her back to bury his nose in her sandy blonde hair that smells of lavender and something subtle like almond. “Be still now and sleep you voracious lass so we shall sleep finally.”

            She feels herself fall into sleep but the dream world distorts itself more than usual like looking through a kaleidoscope instead of a foggy window. _The freezing mud creeps its way up her legs and claws its way to her torso, holding her frozen amongst the fighting people around her. Across her field of vision, a black orc wearing dark iron armor with its long scimitar glinting dangerously in its hands makes her heart stop before beginning to pound viciously beneath her ribs._

 _Her breath quickens as she tries to claw her way out but with every step the orc takes toward her the mud around her tightens to a vice grip around her waist to hold her down. She claws and claws desperately but it’s no use as it tightens to keep its grasp on her. She lets out one desperate whimper and then another after another as the orc comes closer and it raises its weapon to strike when-_ She jolts out of bed at the suddenness.

            Hair tickles her face and a kiss brushes behind her ear. "-na? Lena?" She finally hears being asked again.  _‘Why are they still happening!’_ she screams in her head silently as her heart calms. “Lena? What’s the matter love?” he asks her with a tightening arm.

            “I have. . .nightmares. Have for months,” she forces out.

            Fili pauses behind her. “What? You do?” She nods faintly. “I am so sorry my love. I am so very sorry Lena. Would you like to tell me about them?” he asks the open ended question but her heart jumps in her chest.

 _‘I don’t want to answer him.’_ Her face screws up into the pillow in front of her and lets out a shuddering that breath that there is no possible way Fili misses. His grip tightens on her arm but she doesn’t turn to face him. “They’ve been happening a while now,” she forces out again. “Months and they're almost always the same,” she whispers and Fili stills completely.

            “Have you spoken to anyone about them?” he asks. She nods again. “That’s good,” he praises softly. “You know I am always here for you. I will never leave you to face these alone Lena. Please trust me on that.”

             It takes a second for her to work around the giant lump in her throat before she whispers to him, “The battle,” which causes him to gather her up tighter.

            “I dream of it too but thankfully not often,” he confesses into her shoulder. They settle together in the warm bed before Lena becomes aware of how excited Fili must be at the prospect of their long day together as he pushes against her and strokes further and further down her thighs.

            He feels her soft curves under his hands, her muscles moving under his touch. He places another kiss to her shoulder before he puts a light bite on her neck as he slowly runs his hands up her body, pushing his shirt up to her chest. His fingers play with her breasts while his other hand begins its path down her body. “What do you say? Do you want to get our good day in bed started early love?” he groans behind her ear which causes her to push back into his hands.

            “Love to,” she groans back. _‘We’ll be here for a long time’_ she thinks with a long moan.

_A BIT LATER_

             Thorin and Clara both wake up to light streaming into the room. It’s equal parts stretching out their limbs and reorganizing themselves in bed as they take in the sunlight. “This is the first time we’ve both slept in for a while,” she whispers against his lips. “What do you say that we stay here a little longer?” she taunts. Although Thorin’s eyes remain closed she feels his arm muscles like steel cable coil around her torso and with one around her thigh, right above her knee, he tugs it up sharply hitching it to his waist. Without missing a beat he lifts her like a feather placing her above him with legs on either side of his hips.

             He props his legs up leisurely to keep her face closer to his so she's sitting up against his thighs and grabs behind her knees with sure fingers to hold her pelvis to his. It’s as if he wakes up in an instant, surging up to her lips and kissing her hard until she’s gasping for breath and running her nails down his haired chest. “We’ll be here for a good while then,” he growls against her lips, his beard tickles the skin of her face making her want more. _‘He drives me crazy’_ she thinks with a shudder against his thick thighs.

            “Then why don’t you show me just how long,” she punctuates with a kiss and a grind against him. He shudders once more before becoming the one groaning and tightening his fingers into her skin.

            “I fully intend to.” He lightly runs his lips up her neck, tracing his fingers along her back before winding his fingers into her hair and tugging just enough to make her moan and expose her neck and collar to him. _‘A long time for sure’_ she hopes as the tension in her stomach tightens, and if the look in his eyes says anything then it’ll be a good morning for sure.

_A FEW HOURS LATER_

             While the mood is quiet and relaxed Clara thinks to tell Thorin about her plan for the day no matter how afraid she is of her own itinerary. “So, I was thinking of going to the training grounds today. . .” she trails off and Thorin looks at her with a straight face but Clara knows it's a surprise to him.

              His face gives everything away to her. He’s confused at why she would put herself in that environment if it only causes her panic. “You believe that’s a wise idea Clara?” he asks with tight concern.

              She pauses at first and then nods her head slowly. “Yeah I’m going to try to help myself get over my—um—fear of the sound and, uh, try to get better,” she murmurs. Thorin nods approvingly at this which makes her smile knowing he has her back. She clears her throat as her nerves build up only to assure Thorin some more. “I’m going to have Jorah there if there are any problems like last time.”

             “That is a good idea my love,” he whispers and kisses her once more before getting dressed for his day. “I will be busy for the remainder for the day but I will see you tonight, although I may not be able to join you for supper.”

             “That’s okay hon. Just do the best you can.” She pats his shoulder and starts getting dressed on her own, leaving the skirts for a pair of pants similar to harem pants with a tighter fitting tunic to keep herself comfortable. _‘I mean what’s the point of beginning exposure therapy then?’_ she tells herself.

               Jorah is outside the door when she comes out so she simply nods in greeting before heading down the levels of stairs. “What is on the schedule for today lady Clara?”

             “Well today it’s the training grounds,” she says all small like. She’s never felt so shy in front of Jorah since they’ve begun their time together but this is something she wants to be taken seriously on. This is genuinely important to her and she doesn't need big meatheaded, muscle buff dwarves to make her feel bad about.

               Jorah smiles largely. _‘So the lass can put up a good match’_ he thinks along with the smirk. “So you know how to fight do you?” he chuckles. Clara’s nerves spike at even thinking of sparring with this wall of a dwarf. “I’d enjoy a good round or two if you can handle it,” he laughs again until he looks over at her face and sees her terrified and pale then he knows something is not right. A warm hand is placed on her shoulder as prevention from walking further. “What is it, Clara?”

              “I-I-I- No! I can’t fight! I don’t fight,” she stammers out quickly and brokenly. Her hands shake just thinking about fighting him and Jorah clearly sees this. Shame comes flushed up through her face as she covers it with her hands to avoid him seeing her embarrassment. “It’s the um-,” she pauses for a moment, “-it’s the sound. I get freaked out at the sound okay?” she finishes sharply, more so than she wanted to, unfortunately. To cover up her bitterness she begins to walk, walking much faster than before, and nearly leaving Jorah in the dust before he catches her again.

              His dark eyes become sincere looking at the frightened woman. “I don’t judge other’s wounds, Clara. Whatever you need to do to heal, you do.” Brown eyes look into dark ones before starting forward again without another word. The doors to the training ground come into view at the end of the hallway but there’s the sound again that makes Clara go still. It isn’t as loud as the first time but there are one or two clashing swords inside of the dirt-floored arena.

             “Give me a minute.” Jorah steps aside to give Clara all the room she needs. Her hands shake as she reaches for the handle of the door. When she opens it there are only two people training in the open arena for swords. _‘Good. Less of an audience’_ she thinks.

              She tries to calm her breathing while finding a proper place to sit but her heart is nearly beating out of her chest with all the sounds coming from the two warriors. Her head is becoming faint the longer she stays in here and the longer she watches the two duke it out. _‘Maybe this was a bad idea.’_ Doubt is almost crippling at this point but she can feel Jorah’s eyes on her, watching and waiting to see if she really can do it.

               It starts off slow as she sits with her legs crossed and her eyes closed, taking in the sound while also concentrating on keeping her breathing stable. Soon the sound of the swords ringing becomes softer as she beings to focus on associating the ringing with being calm and feeling a steady heartbeat, like being grounded. She could be meditating for hours or minutes, she doesn't know.

             “Clara?"  _‘Dwalin?’_ She opens her eyes to find the sweaty warrior standing in front of her with an ax in his hands, looking down on her like it’s the last place he would ever expect her to be. “What’re you doin’ here lass?” he pants.  _‘Uh. . .’_

             “I’m working on my fear of the sounds of swords,” she answers quietly. The corner of Dwalin’s mouth curves into an obvious smirk and her spirit is crushed right away. Clara’s expression morphs into hurt that quickly turns into anger, and the moment Dwalin sees, his face evens out as he tries to fix what he’s done, but for Clara the damage is already done. “Get fucked,” she mutters out hurt. As Dwalin rears back at her language she rises from her spot in a quick motion, and as she turns away Dwalin grasps her arm to hold her back. Jorah watches carefully from the corner knowing that Dwalin won't intentionally hurt her, but prepared to defend her regardless.

             “Clara, ya know I didn’ mean that,” he tries to assure her but she looks at him with hurt eyes. “I’ll not take that disr-,” he starts to reprimand her but she butts in against him.

             “I’m trying to make this better and yet you think it's humorous. It's crippling,” her voice breaks half-way through. _‘Shit’_ Dwalin thinks bitterly as he prepares himself to get torn into. He knows he's in the wrong with that one. “I know I’m not impressive and I’m not super brave or strong like everyone else but I’m trying to make it better. I’m trying to figure out how to deal with it.” Dwalin frowns deeply before shaking his head.

              He at least has the decency to look ashamed. “I’m sorry lass. Then I’ll leave you to it,” he mutters before forming a straight lined smile then retreating to do whatever he was doing before. _‘I’m done with this’_ her mind spits.

             “I’m going back to the room,” she whispers to Jorah shortly before speed walking up the hall, leaving the training ground (and Jorah) in the dust once again. _'Stop being silly Clara'_ she tells herself but tears burn at the corner of her eyes at Dwalin's reaction until she hears a shout from one of the rooms pulling her attention away from her thoughts.  _‘Kili?’_ “Kili?” she calls and knocks at the door where there is a small 'enter', but what she finds when she comes in is Kili sitting at his desk with another crumpled piece of paper among the sea of them already surrounding him.

             “I can’t find the blasted words for this letter!” he cries in frustration that is nearly tangible in the room. "Maybe this is just useless!" he cries as he throws the quill against the desk surface.  _'Yikes'_ she mutters internally.

             “Woah. Take a breath," she soothes him but he looks utterly miserable as she continues to come closer. "Is the letter for your mom?” He shakes his head no. “Is it for someone else back in the Blue Mountains?” He shakes his head again. “Is it for a sweetheart then?” His head now snaps toward her with eyes wide enough to nearly fall out of his head.

             “I-You-You can’t tell anyone,” he stresses quickly but she’s already putting her hands up for him to take another breath.

             “It’s okay Kili. I won’t tell anyone. I won't tell anyone unless you tell me it's alright to, okay? So, you don’t know what to write to her, or him?” she calms him down gently as he nods his head. “So let me give you some ideas, okay?

              "I haven't written to her in so long and it's just so. . . impossible," he sighs and Clara smiles. "Maybe she is already happy with someone else by this point."

              "Kili, just writing to her will make her happy, and if someone else has her attention then that's too bad. If not, what you might want to try is-,” and she tells him ideas of what to write. Everything from the compliments, the beautiful script that he should use, and the endearments he feels he should call her. She's letting him use her as a backboard for ideas, bouncing off the not so great ones and holding onto the good. From there, they spend nearly the rest of the evening writing letter after letter to send, and Clara gives him advice on what women want the most and encouraging him every time he doubts himself.

_LATER THAT NIGHT_

             “Uncle,” Kili calls from across the booming hall as Thorin walks back from a meeting in the throne room. Thorin sees the urgent expression on his nephew's face and tries to untangle himself of lords and guards for the moment as they all leave in a great group. Although he is tired from a long day, the smile that adorns Kili’s face is so bright and happy that Thorin feels a portion of the happiness infect himself so he stops to speak with him.

             “What is it Kili?” he prompts as they continue to walk at a slower pace back to Thorin’s room. Thorin always tries to take care to show his nephews his caring side even when he’s frustrated but makes time to indulge them when they need it. There are few people close to him that know that special caring side but now Kili is happy for it and happy that his uncle will really listen to what he’s about to say.

             The young dwarf looks nervous for a second, transitioning to determination, then back to happiness. “I wanted you to know that I am happy for you and Clara. I'm happy that you found someone after so long. I also wanted you to know that I would be just as happy to have her in the family when, or if, the time comes to that. Truly,” he finishes solemnly but with a small smile and a hand clasped against Thorin's elbow. _‘Where is this coming from?’_ Thorin wonders silently, looking at everything that makes up Kili’s expression but only finding joy and admiration in the youthful face.

              He nods, unsure for a second, and knocks their foreheads together in the familial form of the dwarvish hug as a 'thank you'. “I am very glad that you told me then Kili.” Kili merely walks away without another word or without another look back and he takes the time to think about Clara. Seeing her lying in the bed only minutes later with her fanning over the pillows and her face calm, makes him more introspective than usual.  _‘I truly have the rarest of gems. The one and only. Unique.’_


	7. The Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The settlers from The Blue Mountains have finally arrived at the front steps of Erebor and it's time to meet lady Dís. Of course, how can anything in the girl's lives go to plan, and Thorin surprises Clara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry about the writer's block and the lateness of the chapter! It's been so bad trying to figure out the next parts of the story but I'm really happy to be posting again. I hope you enjoy this chapter and the ups and downs of the girls!  
> Thanks again! <3
> 
> Inspiration for Clara's dress  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/UseRucs1ycrXYKLE9  
> Inspiration for Lena's dress  
> https://pin.it/mz3ghxb22vd7c5

**Chapter 7**

Clara POV

            Today is the day. There’s a line of us, Lena, Fili, Kili, the whole line of Durin standing and waiting for the envoy from the Blue Mountains containing Fili and Kili’s mother and a fair amount of the other noble women. I’m hoping that they don’t have it out for either of us seeing as we’ve taken two of the most handsome dwarves in the mountain, the wealthiest dwarves too.  _‘Wouldn’t want them thinking I’m a gold digger’_ I think with a sigh.

            Thorin told me that I should dress nicely today by wearing the same dress from court a few weeks earlier instead of my usual (apparently ragged looking as he lovingly tells me) pants and tunic. I tried to spend my morning hiding in the stables but he found me just as the sun was coming up then convinced me with a gentle nudge to come back to the room and get ready with him.

            Back to now, Gloin’s family is on their way the next few days but I’m more worried about this meeting with Dís. I’m afraid of if she’ll like me, approve of Lena, and especially if she approves of me and Thorin being together seeing as she’s his sister and all and I’m not a dwarf. I’m certainly not wealthy. Hell, if some weird woman were to start dating my own brother I would be skeptical too.  _‘I hope she doesn’t crush me into dust’_ I worry silently and constantly as time ticks by.

            Thorin stands to my right and Fili to my left with Lena on his other side and I’m sure that they can feel my nerves transferring into them. Unfortunately for Fili, he’s stuck in between both me and Lena so he’s bound to feel both of our anxiety ramp up the moment we see caravans closing in on us in the distance.  _‘I’m going to be sick’_ I think as my stomach rolls uncomfortably but then there’s a warm hand holding mine. Thorin’s hand on mine lets my mind finally go quiet.

            “-will love you,” I hear Fili whisper to Lena but I have a rolling gut feeling like everything might just go sour at the last minute. We’ve been living in our near perfect bubble with no crazy politics and no one else doubting our purpose in being here but now may be the change. The lords seem to deal with us being here pretty well, we’re respected by the workers for our own contribution and we’ve even helped negotiations with the Woodland Realm. The canvas tops of the wagons get right up to the gate and my head is swimming from the cortisol pumping through my blood.

            There is a small brush of skin against my hand and I look down at Thorin who’s straight face glances back at me with a little nod. I feel his pinkie finger wrap gently around mine and my heart swells at the gesture.

            He told me about being tough in front of his guard, his friends, and mainly trying not to seem soft in front of his followers, and I had told him that was alright as long as he doesn’t feel as though he is forced to do this to which he simply laughed. He went on to say something about “being as tough as the stone he sits upon” and all of that Middle Earth tough guy talk so fine, whatever.

            There are no words said between us but his side look to me sets me at ease slightly. The more seconds that pass, the louder the hooves of the horses and ponies are against the road. Thorin releases my finger but keeps his hand close enough to keep our skin touching that lets me know he’s not about to simply leave me.  

            Fili leans over to me so I turn my head in order to hear what he has to say. “Allow the others to pass in while we greet mother,” he whispers, “They will be greeted later in the throne room.” I nod almost imperceptibly even though my heart is still beating out of my chest.

            Thorin detaches from me completely and stands strong as the dwarves begin to pour out of the wagons and carts, leaving me nearly speechless at the different people.  _‘They all have beards!’_ I think in shock. Everything is overwhelming to them with the gasping and aweing sounds that are coming from the people who must be seeing something as large as this for the first time.

            They’re wearing beaded dresses, heavily embroidered pants, and tunics, with beautiful elaborate beads in their hair that shine with precious jewels and I know this must not even be their best clothes. They must be their riding or traveling clothes and I can’t even imagine the amount of wealth that must be the normal in some parts of this world. I feel a small pang of jealousy at how beautiful they are even with beards, but I remind myself that it’s normal for them and I shouldn’t judge them for that, nor should I be jealous when I have someone who loves me for me.

            The woman that comes out of the first carriage has nearly jet black hair that when she turns around the curls and dips remind me of Thorin’s if he also turns with his back to me and has a black beard to match. Her skin is white but not stark white of someone who spends all day inside but it’s clear from what I can see. Her shoulders are solid and broad, not nearly as much as the men, with large breasts while her waist dips and gives into full wide hips. The response from Fili and Kili is instantaneous the moment her foot hits the ground.  _‘Mother.’_

            “Amad!” Kili cries as he sprints to her and she sprints back to him with her arms wide open, and not soon after Kili collides with Dís Fili breaks his own composure to embrace her as well. It makes my heart absolutely ache to watch them hug their mother. It makes me jealous in a way that takes me back for a moment when I realize why. It hurts.

             It hurts more than I ever thought it would and it makes it feel like there’s a hole in my chest as they laugh and smile. My eyes string fiercely as I watch them fawn over each other with hugs and kisses pressed into their hair, but I hold my breath as I blink back the moisture to avoid seeming weepy at the first meeting.  _‘I cry enough as it is’_ I joke mentally.

            Thorin finally leaves me and strides through the throngs of dwarves pouring into the mountain in order to reach his family faster. “Do we stay here? Do we come closer?” Lena pulls me out of my own thoughts and musings with her sudden question. My stomach twists uncomfortably as I think.

            I shake my head. “I don’t know what to do,” I whisper back quietly. My mind is blank as I’m still coming down from a blast of nerves and a strong need for comfort from my own mother spiked with jealousy. “Just let them do their thing and then introduce us later.” She nods her head at that and then scoots a little closer until our arms are touching to offer each other silent support, but we can still hear them if we listen closely.

            “Amad, we want to introduce you to someone, well two someone’s,” Kili clarifies and her eyes close for a moment as she shakes her head no.  _‘Wait what?’_ my heart shrivels in my chest at this.

            “Little raven you would run me ragged before I even get the chance to come in from traveling! I am sure I will meet them later,” she responds to him as if she doesn’t sense the urgency or excitement or even the importance of his tone. Her voice is low but not unpleasantly so. If Thorin’s voice reminds me of a base, Dís would be considered a viola with its smoothness and depth and indeed strength. We can hear her all the way from where we’re standing, and as the group moves forward we stand there holding our breath for when she notices us, but the moment never comes.

            “But moth-,” Fili starts but Dís shakes her head again.

            “Give me a chance to get cleaned up and then I can meet them,” she utters again with a pat to his shoulder and moves directly past us without another look. Her eyes are glued to either her children or the interior of the mountain.  _‘It would be better not to barge in’_ I decide quietly.

            Lena and I look at each other with confusion as we realize she didn’t even a flying shit about who we were or why there were these two random humans in her new home. “I’m going to wait until dinner to say hello. You want to go to the stables with me?” I ask.

            She shakes her head no and makes a face. “I’m going to help Ori in the library but I’ll be there for dinner. It’s with the others remember?”  _‘Oh_ _shit’_ I remember.

            “I forgot but I’ll be there and I’ll be clean this time,” I assure her with a straight face. I feel a little too drained to smile. I notice Thorin is giving me a look like he wants me to just walk up and introduce myself but I shake my head and then give a chin nod toward the inside of Erebor to tell him to continue. I give him another small nod and smile to reassure him as I start to move back and blend into the crowds entering Erebor with Jorah tailing me.

            “To the stables then?” he asks and I nod. “Why do you continue your work there if you don’t mind me asking of course? There are other paths you could be pursuing,” he mentions gruffly but I roll my eyes.

            “I like the work and I like how it lets me do something with my hands. It’s calming but there’s always something new if you try hard enough,” I mumble as I tie my hair back. I step into a stall and let the dress fall from me, changing into a summer tunic without sleeves and regular cloth leggings with my boots. With my dress put away and kept from the dirt, I start my work cleaning the pens and then once that’s done I start the feeding.

            There’s a noise at the doors but I don’t pay any attention to it until I’m being yelled at in the close quarters of the pens. “Have you been listening to a word I have said or are you deaf child?” the dam yells and I realize with horror that this is Dís.  _‘Fuck!’_ I shout to myself.  _‘Here we go.’_

             _‘Oh_ _god_ _what do I do?’_ Snap decision then. “I apologize, my lady,” I tell her dutifully with a look towards the ground. The last thing I want to do is surprise her with the fact that I’m sleeping with and courting her brother.

            “I said to make sure that the newly arrived animals are brought in and cared for,” she pauses for a moment and gives me a once over, “if you can manage that better than your listening skills,” she rebukes.  _‘Who the fuck does she think she is? Fuckin’ coming and ordering people around the dumb-_ ‘ I stop myself there before I get too riled up and force myself to keep my temper in check. Instead of shouting like I want to, I give her a low bow and give another dutiful ‘my lady’ before getting back to work.

            Once I feel like all of the animals are better than when I first arrived I take my leave. I don’t bother changing back into my dress as I head back up. I merely walk out with the dress hanging off of my arm and sweat dripping down my brow. Hours have passed since the arrival of the new dwarves and it feels like it’s almost dinner time (if my stomach is a good enough clock).  _‘Time literally flies by when you can’t see outside’_ I sigh.

            That’s what I miss the most about living outside of the mountain. The stars at night and the breezes that whip your hair around your face. Even though I know I shouldn’t take this out of proportion, I’m feeling petty about being yelled at and want to embarrass her just a little. The walk back is short since I’m absorbed in my thoughts nearly the whole time that I didn’t realize just how quickly I was walking.

            “Jorah, you’re excused for the evening,” I tell him softly with a small smile that he returns after a second. It’s nice to see him smile since there are only so many dwarves who do. It’s a common thing to see all of these dwarves walking and talking with angry looking faces or expressions that are completely impassive, but when they do smile it can light up the whole mountain.

            “What to wear?” I talk to myself as I look at the dresses in the wardrobe. We had to have dresses made as everyone continued to get settled. Dori helped the other tailors to get the right shape and cut for Lena and me since we aren’t as stocky as the dwarves and even that had been a task.

             I had nearly burst into tears when I tried on a dress, beautiful by dwarven standards, but all wrong for me. It made my hips and shoulders puff out like I was wearing heavy padding under my clothing and made my insecurities burst to the surface. It folded in exactly the wrong places and was the opposite of flattering. The second I showed the little crowd in the room it was apparent on their faces that it, and I, was as ugly as I thought, nearly worse when one man winced at the unflattering garment.

             I draw a bath as I push the memories away while I take my time picking out one of my simple dresses that shows off what I want it to but that doesn’t scream fancy (not to the extreme of this culture at least). I let the feeling of the silk and taffeta under my fingers relax me even further as the sound of water gurgles from the washroom.

             I settle on a plain blue silk gown to lie on the bed for after the bath. It’s dark blue, almost black, on the top section that only goes down to my waist where the blue becomes lighter and the waist settles close to my skin. The bottom portion flows outward and Dori was delighted to see how good this design makes me look. The long sleeves almost go over my shoulders but not quite so it leaves my chest partially bare.

             Thorin loves to see me wear dresses that show off the curve of my neck and shoulder and especially my collar bone. It’ll highlight the braids I’m planning on putting into my hair.  _‘This will certainly show her.’_ I scoff to myself as I realize how Cinderella story-esque this all is with pretending to be someone else and then show up dating the magical prince.

             The bath isn’t as long lived as I hoped it would be.  _‘Disappointing.’_ I dirty the water too quickly to fully enjoy the soaking so I leave the water feeling blue and suddenly nervous about Dís’s reaction to me walking in there tonight.  _‘She’ll probably think I’m a servant or something’_ I muse. It’s quiet in the room as I slip on the dress and look at myself in the mirror.  _‘I’ve certainly changed.’_

             My skin is clear of blemishes for the most part but there are new freckles adorning my face from the exposure to the sun on the trip here. I’m generally smaller than before and less full-bodied than when I started at Bilbo’s smial which makes me partially sad. I've always had strong thick legs and now I see traces of myself but it's not the same.

              It makes me look delicate, in a way, the longer I look and I realize that I’m the beauty standard of home but now I want the beauty standard here.  _‘You can never win can you?’_ I’ll stick out without the full breasts and legs with strong muscles. I sigh.

            “Clara? Are you in—oh! There you are!” Lena calls when she sees me in front of the mirror. “That’s such a pretty dress!” Her brows pinch and her lips purse as she thinks. “I didn’t know we were getting dressed up, were we?” she asks slowly and I shake my head.

             “No, this isn’t technically fancy. I mean it’s definitely fancier than what I usually wear but I wanted to make a good impression on her since she already yelled at me.” Lena’s face looks confused. “Yeah, mother and I met. So when I was in the stables she literally walked right up to me and yelled at me thinking I was some human serving girl,” I mutter angrily as I drag the elaborately designed hairbrush through my hair.

             “Wow. That’s awfully presumptuous of her,” Lena mutters back as she plops down on my bed. “She wasn’t nice at all?”

               I shake my head even though she can’t see it. “Honestly, she was just mean and she presumed I was the lower class when I was working and that’s just rude in itself.”

               She sighs to herself from the couch. “So, then what should I wear if we’re doing this shock and awe thing?”

             “Well maybe you could wear that green dress with the high collar, you know? The one with the gold embroidery on the neck. . .” I trail off and her eyes light up.

             “I love that one! Great then! I’ll go get changed for dinner and I’ll let your braid your hair,” she says after she gets off of the bed. She opens up the door but just as she’s about to leave she pauses and looks back to tell me, “Try to control yourself tonight. Don’t be aggressive or combative and don’t yell or anything either.”

            “You’ve got it!” I finish the last thick braid and position it to drop along my collar bone while I take my time looking myself over in the mirror. I hear the door whoosh open and see in the reflection Thorin walk in with his head down, but when he looks up there’s a blank expression once he takes in my reflection.

            I see it in his mouth first, the muscles relax and his lips slightly part in surprise. “Clara,” he breathes quietly and I turn to face him fully. His jaw is slack, mouth parted, and his eyes are wide set on me. My heart stops and the air between us from the door to the mirror is thick like honey. My eyes zone in more on his expression as he begins opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water. “You are-I have no-oh you look beautiful,” he eventually sighs out reverently. His eyes roam over my body and it makes me feel strong. It makes me feel absolutely powerful.

            “Hi there,” I say quietly with a wide smile on my face. “I’d like to make a good first impression and all,” I motion to the dress with one hand while the other stays tucked behind my back.

            Thorin walks forward enough to leave us only feet away from each other and my heart beats frantically. I never knew that every time I see him it makes me feel as though it’s the first time all over again.

            “You’re certainly making an impression with me, my love,” he murmurs lowly to me with another blazing look over my body and then his lingering gaze on my bared throat that makes my skin flush.

             I smile coyly at him, “Shall we head to dinner? I’m pretty hungry and I’m more than excited to meet your sister.” I give him a knowing yet innocent smirk as if I have no idea what I’m doing to him. He looks at me cautiously as his motions slow down and he starts to suspect something like planning to cause a scene, but with nothing to go on he lets it go.

            Once Thorin is cleaned and changed for dinner we head out on the short walk to the dining hall. “Now Dís can be headstrong but I will assure you that she will come to love you as I do,” he informs me as we walk side by side.  _‘Yeah, I bet she’s kind when she realizes the person is dating her brother’_ I internally scoff.

            “I sure hope she won’t fuck me like a rabbit in heat like you do,” I joke lowly, hoping he doesn’t hear me clearly but the sudden glare he sends my way it tells me he did.

            “Mind your language, Clara. There are more highborn members coming and they will be less accepting of such foul words as we are,” Thorin snips so suddenly I’m taken aback. I stop walking and tug his arm to stop with me.

           “They’ll be less accepting of it because I don’t have a penis not because the language I use offends them,” I retort. Thorin opens his mouth with his brow pinched angrily and I shut him up with another quip. “I am who I am and I have just as much fire as any dwarf and I won’t let you, or anyone else, muzzle me. Unless I ask you to of course,” I whisper to him, my eyes burning brightly into his deep blue ones as I bite my bottom lip. This shuts Thorin up enough that he only nods at my statement before looking at the ground and continuing walking.

            The guards open the doors to the dining hall and as Thorin is greeted by Dís at the end, whereas I take my time walking in and looking at the room as a whole. Lena is sitting next to Fili per usual and she looks so beautiful. She does usually but tonight she has her hair twisted and beaded and she looks like a perfectly cut emerald.  _‘Damn Fili must love her so much’_ I think with a smirk. I know that it’s all about to change the second I feel Dís put her eyes on me and rake me over the proverbial coals.

           “What is a stable girl doing here brother?” she questions irritatedly and the others widen their eyes at this.  _‘I’m ready.’_

             Thorin stands with a hand on his sister’s shoulder. “Dís, this is Clara Jones, the woman I told you of earlier that you refused to meet as you said it could wait.” The dam takes her time looking me up and down while I walk over to my seat on Thorin’s left past the head of the table and sit down without even so much as a greeting or a smile.

            “Hm,” she huffs unapprovingly after a moment as she also becomes seated. “I have to say you look better like that than in those dirtied clothes.”  _‘Bitch.’_

            “You’re much more tolerable when you’re not raging at me for being, as you called it ‘incompetent’,” I tell her coolly. I lock gazes with her only to find that the Durin gaze is, in fact, hereditary. Her eyes are a deep blue like Thorin’s and the closer I look at her appearance the more similarities I begin to notice. Her hair has the same pattern as Thorin’s with the white beginning to color her roots and strands while her beard comes down to the middle of her jaw before stopping and leaving her with a chin strip of deep black hair at the bottom.

             Fili clears his throat as well as the tense atmosphere. “Mother this is Lena Wilson. She also accompanied us on the quest and helped in slaying Smaug.” Dís’s eyes widen at this and her lips purse to a single line.

            “Such an introduction and yet no curtesy or word from you lady Lena,” she adds when Lena doesn’t stand up or acknowledge her and the half of the table is dead silent.

             I’m ready to cut her already. Screw civil. “We aren’t about to show blind respect to someone who shows us none right at the start,” I hiss and the tension in the air is palpable.

            “Clara,” Thorin nearly growls from the head of the table and I get a dirty glare from Lena and I raise my eyebrows at her.

            “We talked about this,” she reminds me as she takes a sip of her drink and acts as though we’re the only two here. The family looks between the two of us for a moment as I try to work out a vague statement to say back to her. Lena’s face is covered with a mix between annoyance and frustration with a splash of disappointment at the way tonight might swing.

            I squash my anger and stuff it in the confines of a mental cage for the moment as I think in the tense silence. “Yeah we did but I really don’t think tonight is gonna work for that,” I sigh and close my eyes as I try to rein in my emotion and the urge to just walk out of here.

           “Try harder,” she snips and I tamp down my bitterness for the time being as the food is brought out and redirects the tension of the room. Dinner is served as usual and there are the usual telling’s of everyone’s days along with anything unique that has happened over the period between our last group dinner. I nearly forget Dís is there until I spit out a swear word from surprise at a point in a story to the table causing her to choke and cough on her wine.

            She looks at me as though I’ve taken off my clothes and jumped on the table. She looks at me like how someone looks at a mother lifting a car off of a baby. “Where did you learn to speak like that? That is highly vulgar speech for a lady,” she talks down to me and I bark out a laugh knowing it’ll piss her off even more.

            “I’ve been talking like that way before I met any of these rascals,” I gesture to the rest of the table and get a few laughs back.

            “And did you kiss your mother with that mouth?” Bofur laughs and my eyes light up with the playful teasing.

            “No, but I’ll kiss yours,” I quip back with a wink causing a small gasp to come from somewhere down the table,  _‘probably Lena’_ I smile to myself while leaving several dwarves spluttering and the others with a light dusting of blush across their cheeks. Lena is in the first group as she begins to full out laugh at my quick wit.

            “Clara!” Thorin groans with a scandalized look. I look at Dís from the corner of my eye and feel suddenly surprised at the smile she has cracked on her face.

            “And you call us scoundrels!” Nori hoots with a sly grin on his face.

            “You’re right brother,” she starts as she gives me another side glance, “I certainly do like her.” She chuckles to herself before continuing to eat. The rest of the table is either laughing to themselves or watching the scene at my end of the table.

            The rest of dinner is less eventful as the beginning as we merrily chat with one another and even Dís begins to smile at how her boys animatedly retell stories from the adventure here. The evening goes on to become late night chatting and we decide to move to one of the other rooms with sofas and a blazing fire. The only ones who are left in the lounge are Thorin and me, Fili and Lena, Kili, and Dís. I finally feel calm as I take a seat close to the fire. The mountain will never not feel cold to me.

            “How did the two of you join on the quest?” the dam asks and I shrug my shoulders.

            “Well we met at Bilbo’s in The Shire and one thing led to another and the next thing you know we’re traveling with thirteen dwarves!” I finish cheerily. “It was all Gandalf’s idea to have us come along with them all,” I add.

            “They’re psychic! You should have seen them on the quest and how they knew what was going to happen before it happened! It was truly amazing!” Kili adds on to that while Lena and I only can sigh.

            Dís laughs at that and then turns to the both of us that are lounging on the couch with a smirk. “Oh really? You both are psychics?”

            “I guess we are now,” Lena groans with a mock glare at Kili. “Thorin wasn’t going to take us so Gandalf told him we were psychic so they would have to,” she explains and Dís shakes her head with another chuckle. She looks carefully at Lena with calculating eyes before sitting up straighter than before.

            “When did you start courting my son lady Lena?” she asks coolly. I widen my eyes.  _‘I guess her kids are first.’_

            She looks between me and Fili for a second before settling back on Dís. “Well, um, I-we,” she corrects, “just came together.”

            “She must be my one,” Fili chimes in quietly. His voice is so small it’s almost covered by the crackling of the wood in the fire. “I wanted to court her when I first saw her. Wanted to impress her any way I could really,” he laughs and he also earns a laugh from Kili.

            “I thought he would never ask her. He would spend nearly all of his time lost in his head thinking about her too,” he groans and then smiles.

            “And when did lady Clara begin courting you brother?” she wonders with another sly glance to Thorin. Thorin gives her a slight glare but she shrugs it off. “Oh brother, I know that you wouldn’t ask her first, I’ve known you too long for that. Now, when did she ask you?”

            “He knew the first time I yelled back at him,” I begin, remembering seeing Thorin for the first time in the small house and how even though he was a jerk he took my breath away.

            “Insufferable woman had the gall to disobey almost every order I gave and still does,” he muses lightly.

            “And what will both of you do with your shares?” she asks as she relaxes into her chair.

            I look to Lena and she looks at me. “Wait, what? What do you mean by ‘shares’?” I try to ask her shyly but not seem like an idiot about it.

            “Yeah, what?” Lena tags on with her own confused face and we’re both waiting but Dís seems just as confused as we are.

            “Why the share of the treasure that you signed to contract of the quest,” she suggests as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You did sign a contract did you not?”

            I open my mouth and she and Lena look at me. “No we didn’t, I mean I didn’t. If anything I thought I would be dead by now so I never really asked or cared about being paid for it. I mean I don’t really care about gold now anyway,” I tell her slowly and she looks at me like I am for sure a total idiot. Like completely stupid as she looks at Lena only to get the same answer.

            “It's not like you can eat gold or keep yourself warm with it. It's kind of impractical and honestly I thought I would be either home or dead, so I’m in the same boat,” Lena speaks up. I laugh at how shocked she looks at our answers.

            Lena snorts a laugh along with me. “What, did you expect? Us to be gold snatchers and seductresses looking at your family for their money and the crown?” I ask sarcastically but she nods her head slightly. “Oh!” I realize in shock that she’s serious. I shrink back into my seat and give a dramatic grimace that makes Kili snort.

            Dís smooths out the front of her dress before standing and looking to both of her children and then the two of us. “I hope that I get to know both of you better and I’m sure I will in the future, but the night is for sleeping. Good night my little raven and my lion,” she bids Fili and Kili. “Brother,” she nods to him and then leaves.

            “What happened earlier between you two for you to act like that?” Kili demands as soon as his mom leaves the room and Thorin turns his body toward me as well.

            I tilt my head back against the back of the sofa and smile. “Well, she mistook me for a stable girl and then ordered me around a bunch, yelled at me and here I am. Not a stable girl.”

            “And that is why you dressed up more than usual,” Thorin concludes. I nod.

            “Well that and also it’s nice to dress up,” I add with a smirk. “It’s a good way to get you riled up,” I whisper in his ear.

            “Ugh! I don’t want to hear about that!” Lena cries while Kili pretends to gag and Fili laughs. “It’s getting late. We should all go to sleep soon since we’re going to have to greet everyone tomorrow,” she mentions and I feel my stomach drop.

            “That sounds like a good idea. I’m pretty tired and we should try to get more sleep,” I nudge Thorin’s arm. “You work yourself so hard my love.” I kiss his bearded cheek and squeeze his hand gently. "Night everyone!"

            The walk back to the room is quiet as we’re both pretty tired and we’re both not quite looking forward to tomorrow. Thorin’s groan as he takes off his tunic tells me exactly that and he might be under more stress than he lets on. I let my dress fall to the floor and slip on a tunic near the end of the bed.

            “Come here honey,” I wave him over to the mattress. “Here, lay down and let me rub your back. You seem really tense,” I whisper gently and place a kiss to his neck. “Keep goin’,” I push him on the bed with more of my puny human strength.

            “No, Clara I need to look at more papers for tomorrow,” he groans and pushes back against me but I turn him around again with a strong push here and a strong tug there.

            “There will always be paperwork but let me take care of you. Let me relax you and pleasure you,” I whisper close to his ear as I tug on the cuff in the shell of his ear.

            “Nuh!” he protests pitifully as I manhandle him a little more before relenting to me. The heat radiating off of him feels like a blanket that’s fresh out of the dryer and his skin feels so soft against my hands.

            “Relax on the bed, on your stomach.” I move his hair out of the way and straddle his lower back, gently moving my hands over his shoulders.

             The first push of my hands gains me a low moan from Thorin, and the more I push against his stiff muscles the more groans I get. When the muscles are finally soft and relaxed I change my motions to sweeping instead of digging which earns me more soft sighs from his lips.  _‘Oh_ _those sweet kissable lips’_ I think to myself but control myself because this is about him, not me.

            “Roll over,” I whisper as I hop off of his back and resituate myself next to him and open my arms to him so he can sleep on me. I close my eyes for a second and only have that second before his soft lips are pressing against mine, the feeling of his prickly beard against my skin, and one of his calloused hands coming up to cup my jaw.

              I smile as he pulls away, not thinking about anything but basking in this moment that we’re here together and there’s only the two of us. His face comes into view above me, and oh man does he still make me breathless. Everything about this man makes my heart swell. I don’t care if he’s raging mad or if he’s sleeping like a baby because I adore him. I love him more than I have loved anyone and I hope he loves me just as much.

             Thorin’s mouth parts for a second before he looks down, his breath stuttering, and back up into my eyes before breathing in sharply. He looks nervous if I didn’t know him better. I’ve never known him to be so nervous like this

            “Thorin? What’s wrong?” I cup his cheek and I feel my worry start to rise when he doesn’t answer right away. “Thorin?” I ask him again softer this time. My thumb rubs over his cheekbone and I realize how much I've gotten used to the feel of his beard under my fingertips, but realize even more so that I enjoy it.

             He closes his eyes for three long seconds before opening them and locking gazes with me. His fingers thread through my hair gently before he looks into my eyes, softly whispering, “Marry me.”

 


	8. A Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena meets lady Dís and helps Clara out with her problem of Thorin's proposal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or its characters, only my own.
> 
> Thank you so much for the comments and kudos because they bring me so much joy! I really hope that you like this chapter, but unfortunately, they will be coming much slower than one a week.  
> Have fun reading!
> 
> Inspiration for Lena's dress:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/4e4W3G7C4HPHSKt28  
> Inspiration for Dís's dress:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/Nx7C9oGzHKNodTPU6

**Chapter 8**

Lena POV

            Today is the day. Everyone is arriving from the Blue Mountains today and I’m kind of freaking out. My stomach is doing flips inside of my body and all I can think about is that she’s not going to like me. I wanted to wear pants but nooooo! Fili told me to dress nicely since the other nobles will be seeing us for the first time so he picked out one of the grey airy dresses that looks like mist blowing in the wind with clasps down the front to hold the darker grey overcoat on.

            We’re standing shoulder to shoulder at the entrance of the mountain and I’m stuck between Fili and Kili while Clara is stuck between Thorin and Fili. “Are you sure that you want to introduce me now? What if she doesn’t like me,” I whisper worriedly to Fili but he shakes his head and gives me a firm squeeze in our interlocked hands.

            He sighs. “You worry so much Lena. Don’t worry about meeting her because I know she will love you,” he whispers back. I don’t really take his words to heart but I guess I don’t have much choice since the canvas wagon tops and carriages are coming steadily closer, if not faster than before, now that the mountain is finally in view.

            “Amad will love you,” Kili whispers from my other side but that still doesn’t help my nerves.

            I’m nearly vibrating with excitement and nerves when they finally pull up, and it’s even worse when I see the first person step out of the wagon. The streams of people are never-ending and as they walk over to us I want to move out of their way, but that wouldn’t look good for the girlfriend of the crowned prince to be seen running out of the way of new subjects.

            “Amad!” Kili cries, causing me to snap my head to him but it’s a second too late. He takes off without another word and I’m left standing next to Fili feeling like an idiot with my mouth open in surprise at his break in composure and then I’m standing alone! Fili decides to take off right after him in a dead sprint! They both slam into a woman who must be their mom by the looks of her long black hair and her strong beard that match Thorin nearly to a T.

             I feel a pang of hurt at watching their whole family coming together and being happy but I suck it up and deal with it as I stand strong with Clara. She looks as if she’s doing better than how I feel. _‘Wow what I’d give for a head of hair like that’_ I think with a second of envy the longer I look at Dís.

            When I look over at Clara I find her just as alone and just as captivated by the scene as I am. She looks completely absorbed in the scene and when I do a double take of the whole thing I see her face scrunch up once before straightening out into an expression pretty void of emotion. All of our dwarves are gone.

            “Do we stay here? Do we come closer?” I ask her and she startles as if she forgot I was even there. She looks at the group of people hugging and cooing over each other for a little while longer before looking over at me.

            I don’t know what to do,” she whispers back. I focus on breathing in and out as more dwarves rush past us and more wagons, ponies, and carts pull in behind them. “Just let them do their thing and then introduce us.” I don’t argue with that because even though Dís isn’t paying attention to us, she’s still highly intimidating with such strong features and most likely stone crushing strength.

             It makes my heart ache a little at how familiar they are after all this time but seeing Fili happy like this makes it better. His smile right now is something more different than I’ve seen the entire time I’ve known him. His grin is contagious to even Thorin who’s smiling at Dís.

            “Amad, we want to introduce you to someone, well two someone’s,” Kili tells his mom but she shakes her head. _‘Wait what?’_ I wonder worriedly. _‘She doesn’t want to meet us?’_

            “Little raven you would run me ragged before I even get the chance to come in from traveling! I am sure I will meet them later,” she responds with a sigh that only comes from an exasperated mother.

            “Uh oh,” I mutter to myself and shut my eyes in frustration for a second.

            “Give me a chance to get cleaned up and then I can meet them,” their mother tells them again and I hold my breath as she walks right past us with Fili and Kili hanging off of her arms like children at the grocery store. Fili gives me a sorry look as he passes but still cranes after his mother.

            “I’m going to wait until dinner to say hello. Do you want to go to the stables with me?” Clara offers with a light smile but I shake my head no. _‘Not in the mood for shoveling shit today’_ I think with an internal sigh.

            I take a look back at the group before turning back to Clara. “I’m going to help Ori in the library but I’ll be there for dinner. It’s with the others, remember?” I remind her back as her face is just not giving the look that she actually remembers the group dinner. Her eyes light up and I just know that she totally forgot.

            We part ways with a few more words and a nod or two before I take my own way with Harfur into the belly of the kingdom. I take my time walking to the library, looking around with curious eyes like all of the new people are, and also watching out for anyone carrying personal belongings through the halls to new rooms and exploring their new home after a long journey.

            “How do you feel about all of the new families and people moving into the mountain?” I ask Harfur as he walks next to me with the same leisurely pace but with stiffer posture.

            “I believe that this kingdom will once again thrive like the days of old,” he murmurs as he scans the dwarves walking in front of us, and most likely watching behind us at the same time. The library doors are a familiar and welcome sight after the chaos at the gates. I feel my nerves melt away as the door shuts and I’m left with the few bookworms in the library like Ori and Balin, and a few other dwarves I’ve yet to meet.

            “Ah Lena,” Balin sighs as he sees me approaching with a kind smile. “Not with lady Dís or Fili?” he asks with a frown after a second.

            I shake my head. “She wanted to rest and didn’t really want to meet anyone until she got cleaned up,” I tell him with a wry smile. I’m getting over the botched introduction quickly because I know I’ll just see her tonight at dinner. “Is there anything for me to do here?”

            Ori laughs and then motions frantically to the piles of books surrounding him. “There is no shortage of work here,” he chuckles again and begins to put books into more stacks, kicking up more dust in the process.

            “Are these from a different portion of the library?” I ask him and Balin. I’ve figured out that they do have a type of system similar to the Dewy Decimal system but with runes and figures instead of the barcodes and it gets messier than ours due to the fact they haven’t put runes on every book in the library. Both of them nod their heads.

            “I believe it will take nearly an army of scribes to get this place in order once more,” Balin sighs.

            “I don’t think it will take that, but it will be a challenge,” I agree, looking at the long table piled high with the old books that either look simply dusty or are falling apart with pages trying to escape their bindings.

            Ori lifts his head to gaze across the table with a type of wonder at the sight of all the old covers. “I’d like a challenge,” he voices quietly from the end and that wonder hardens into a determination that wasn’t there before the quest. I know he always wanted to do a good job and make everyone proud before we got here but now there’s something mature in him that I can’t quite place. Balin looks him over with a smirk at the corner of his lips and nods his head once before getting back to work silently.

            Every book feels different in my hands. There are some so ornate that they must be worth a fortune on their own whereas others feel like the leather has been worn and replaced and repaired many times over while the pages inside are torn and tattered. It’s not just a library, it’s a museum of all of their histories that can’t be bought again at a bookstore or looked up on the internet. It’s really just these one or two copies and that’s it. The end of this book and possibly the knowledge inside of it.

            “How often is a book copied, Balin?” I ask him suddenly, breaking the silence of the shuffling of books and paper.

            He stops sorting books and looks at me thoughtfully, mulling over thoughts in his head. “Well, with the right scribe it can take, oh, a book of this size. . . years I’d say.” My mouth falls open.

            “Seriously?” I cry out in shock. “It will take years for someone to copy a book? Is this all copied by hand?” He looks surprised at my question and Ori does too.

            “How else would it be copied?” he asks slowly with a glance to Balin. They both have stopped sorting the books to look at me.

            _‘What the heck?’_ I wonder. Haven’t they ever heard of a printing press? “Don’t you have a printing press to move it along at all?”

            Balin’s face is blank. “What-?” he trails off as he looks at me with a confused look and waits for me to elaborate.

            “It’s an invention that lets you organize metal letters into words, put ink over them, press it into paper and then when you peel the paper off you’re left with a full page of a book. It’s what we, in my world, call a printing press. It’s pretty self-explanatory,” I tell them as I run my thumb over a ridged leather spine of a book.

            The silence that reigns after my explanation could fill a room. It stuffs up the atmosphere between the three (well four) of us around the long table as they think about it. Seconds turn into minutes. I can’t stand the silence and the tension that builds up.

            “So, what do you think?” I ask and they both look pensive at the idea.

            “But then wouldn’t there be fewer scribes if they didn’t have to write books?” Ori wonders in the silence. I laugh a little and shake my head.

            “Just because it may not take years to make a book, it doesn’t mean there would be less of a need for scribes. They would still have to put the books together and check the writing for mistakes that might have been missed,” I explain and his eyes light up. “You would still have to write things, new things, and then once it’s done it could be put into the press and be made a book. It’s just an idea,” I end and look back to the books.

            “That is very inventive and very interesting. We can look at designs for that possibly a different day,” Balin suggests and I nod with a smile.

            “That would be good. I’d like to contribute any way I can. Somehow make things easier for everyone,” I add as I sort more dusty books into piles and onto carts. _‘I hope they like it or they could just throw it into the drain’_ I think silently. Balin decides to take off and help Thorin, leaving me to sort with Ori and Harfur.

            Hours pass sorting the books on that table until the whole table is completely cleared of both books and dust. My feet hurt from taking lap after lap around the library and my biceps are sore from holding piles of books. In reality, the table thick and beautiful that’s stained with a deep brown color that makes it looks beyond royal, but the years of dust have not been too kind to it. We all stand back and take in the sight of the table so clean you could eat off of it.

            “Am I the only one that is proud of this?” I ask the two of them with a head nod toward the area of concern. Ori shakes his head and looks like he’s glowing with his pride. I smile at this and when Harfur nods his head as well my smile and pride grow. “We did a really good job here.”

            “Unfortunately there are tables all through here that look the same as that one did,” a voice calls and I know exactly who it is.

            “Fee! I-How long were you there? Why aren’t you with your mom?” I ask him gently as he wraps me into a warm, and energetic, hug and as we smile at each other. He tugs me down for a chaste kiss but I want even more now. Being with him makes me feel like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It’s warm like a summer day, it’s filling like eating a perfect cake, and it makes me feel loved like no one ever has before. Devotion both ways. It’s a feeling I will cherish every day.

            “I was with her and Kee but she wanted to catch up with uncle on her own even though he’s busy signing papers all day.” He sighs and once I frown back the room gets quiet. “I wanted to come and apologize to you for my mother’s behavior. I thought she was going to want to meet you, not-,” he sighs again as he thinks back to before. “I’m sorry sweetheart,” he apologizes gently as he runs his thumb over the back of my knuckles.

            “Then let’s go get ready for dinner and I can meet her then in front of the whole company as well. No big deal,” I assure him. My sense of pride is waning as I look back at the table and then back to Fili. My stomach is beginnings its stretching for the acrobatics it’s going to do later tonight and my worry is just around the corner at what dinner might bring.

            “I am very excited to introduce you to her,” Fili explains as we walk through the halls back to our rooms in the royal wing. “She brings out the best in everyone in our family. Thorin smiles more, Kili and I were better at home, but after the quest, I think we’ve matured more than she’s ready for. It’s nearly been a year without her.” His smile is bittersweet at the thought.

            “In a few more months it will be the time of year that I saw you first in that quite revealing outfit in the middle of the grove.” He turns to me fully and holds me close to his chest. “You are so fair and beautiful Lena,” he whispers and pecks my cheek with his lips. I giggle as he mustache tickles my cheek and he plants more butterfly kisses on my face.

            “I love you,” I whisper into his lips and I feel them curve into a beaming smile under mine. He’s so absolutely radiant. He’s like looking at the sun with his golden hair and vibrant personality. “Come on, Casanova let’s get out of here before we get all worked up,” I laugh and tug myself from his grip as he scrunches his face in confusion at the reference which only makes me giggle more.

             Harfur takes his leave once we get to the room and we’re left to get ready for dinner. “What are you thinking of amrâlimê?” He comes up behind me and runs his large hands over my lower belly while his chin rests on my shoulder. “Something good I’d hope,” he whispers into my ear. _‘I’m not even changed yet!’_ I think as my stomach tightens in excitement.

              I exhale shakily and cover his hands with my own, threading our fingers together tightly in anticipation of his next move. “Very good,” I moan back to him going on to say, “But we don’t have t-t-time for that,” I huff as he mouths at my collar and his tongue traces the shell of my ear, so I break away from his embrace but wind my fingers in his soft hair, tugging him in for a fierce kiss that leaves us both breathless and slightly sated for the time being.

            “Would you like to bathe first?” he asks me back slightly breathless after a pause and slight panting from our kiss. I smile and shake my head, telling him to go ahead and shower while I go and check on Clara.

             I don’t bother knocking as we basically file in and out of each other's rooms until sundown unless the doors are locked because dwarves honestly have the largest libido in this whole world and nighttime is sexual free reign. I open the door only to find her standing there like a living statue in front of the ornate full-length mirror wearing one of her nicer dresses with a frown on her face until I catch her attention.

            “-Yeah, mother and I met. So when I was in the stables she literally walked right up to me and yelled at me thinking I was some human serving girl,” she tells me as she drags the brush through her long hair. Both of us have changed since coming here with all of the walking, running, and sometimes food shortages. This world is brutal on us. It’s just a challenge every day that we don’t know how to combat since we also don’t know combat.

            “Wow. That’s awfully presumptuous of her,” I mutter back as I fall back on her bed and relax onto the furs. “She wasn’t nice at all?” I wonder again as I pop my head up to look at her.

            “Honestly, she was just mean and she presumed I was the lower class when I was working and that’s just rude in itself.” She shrugs her shoulders and continues fidgeting with her dress and hair, getting her beads ready to put into her specific braids. She suggests that I also dress up more and I sigh. _‘More dresses’_ I think with an internal groan, but she surprises me by asking about the green dress that’s basically a long overcoat that I can wear pants under.

            “I love that one!” I tell her and even though I’m wearing a nice dress already I would like to look nice for their mother. “Great then! Let me get changed for dinner and I’ll let you braid your hair,” I motion to her beads on the dresser and hope off of the bed.

             Just before I get to the door I realize something. _‘This probably should go without saying but I should say it’_ I think. “Try to control yourself tonight. Don’t be aggressive or combative and don’t yell or anything either,” I add as I realize she might clash with Dís like she clashed with Thorin. She stops for a moment and then smiles.

            “You’ve got it!” she calls. I head out and back to my own room further down the hall, open the door and find Fili tying his pants onto his chiseled hips. I feel my heart speed up and my face grows a little hot.

            “There you are,” he smirks as he sees me standing and watching him in the reflection of the mirror. “I was wondering what had taken you so long,” he chuckles. I know that words are coming out of his mouth but everything about him fries my brain when he’s shirtless like this, and honestly, even when he’s fully clothed he draws all of my attention.

            I open and close my mouth again before simply smiling and shaking my head. “Yeah, we were just talking about our day and lost track of time,” I tell him with the smirk still on my face. I’m still fairly clean so I rinse my body off with water and put on some sweet smelling oil onto my wrists and along my neck. The dress overcoat is hanging in the closet along with the deep brown leggings hanging next to it. It’s nice to have clothes that are made specifically for me and that fit me almost perfectly when on the way here we were wearing clothes that were always modified, always ill-fitting, and then wearing other people’s clothing like Sigrids.

            This really is one of my favorite dresses seeing as it’s the perfect shade of green that brings out the green in my eyes and the golden embroidery that reflects my hair. “You look ravishing,” Fili says as he looks me up and down like a hungry lion looking at a piece of meat. His voice is lower than usual, gravelly and rough, causing me to shiver heavily under his gaze. _‘Not today!’_

            “What I look like is ready for dinner,” I whisper snarkily with raised eyebrows and a wide smirk. I let out a bright laugh at the disappointed face that looks back at me with desperate blue eyes and an open mouth in shock. “And we’re going to be late if you want to rip this dress off of me,” I whisper again. _‘There’s that hungry look again’_ I realize at my choice of words to which it’s a mental face palm. “Come on or we’ll really be late!” I retreat to the door with a hop in my step to narrowly avoid being swept into his arms like a riptide as we skirt off to the private dining hall.

          “What do I do? How do I introduce myself? Do I just say ‘hi my name is Lena, I’m dating your son’?” I ask him quietly as the halls are very echoey when they lack people in them.

          “’Dating’?” he questions with a smirk at the corner of his mouth.

           “Courting,” I clarify. “I don’t want to make a fool out of myself when I meet her,” I worry.

            Fili holds onto my hand and gives it a little tug. “You won’t and she will love you. She loves me, I love you, and so, therefore, she will love you.” _‘I hope so.’_ The dining hall is filled with everyone except Clara and Thorin, so we find our seats and wait for them to show up before dinner is started.

           “You look lovely lass,” Gloin whispers as I pass him. With the impending arrival of his family, Gloin has been hovering over me and Clara with this fatherly air about him. It’s all ‘lass this’ and ‘lass that’ and ‘be careful lass’. I smile at his concern though. It’s nice and it makes me swell with happiness at the attention from the company. _‘They really are my family now’_ I understand finally. I feel home.

             I’m pulled out of my daydreaming by the door opening and Dís coming in, leading into a round of standing and bowing with a chorus of ‘my lady’ while I’m the only one too shocked to know what to say. As I sit there and look around with my mouth opening and closing, Thorin walks in with Clara hot on his heels and she already looks like a bitch without Dís even saying anything. _‘Hope for the worst and maybe the best will happen’_ I hope internally.

             The dinner goes as planned, or at least how I had planned, with Clara making a bit of a scene and then a normal and fun dinner like every time we get together. There’s witty banter that makes my stomach hurt from laughing so hard and tears spring to my eyes, and once we move into the lounge I’m ready for the grilling I might get about dating Fili.

             As everyone winds down for the night, I feel tired as all hell. There was a lot of brain power that went into sorting a monstrous table of books and then the wipeout of nerves from this dinner and then this quiet sit down.

            The walk back to the room is just as uneventful as always and getting ready for bed is per usual, but what’s unusual is the fast knocking on the door out of the blue. _‘I just laid down’_ I groan silently and out loud as I raise myself from the warm covers. I put on the light robe in case it’s someone important. The knocking blasts through the silence of the room again and this time it’s more of a banging than a knocking.

            “Who is it, love?” Fili calls from the other room but I wait before answering him and opting for answering the door first. I open the cold handle only to be blown away by Clara storming into the room with a panicked face and energy radiating off her like heat from a flame.

            I’m puzzled. “Clara?” She makes eye contact with Fili (not even responding to me), walks up to the door leading to the bedroom, pushes him back through the doorway with a well-aimed shove and slams the door shut in his face. “What the hell was that for?” I cry out but go silent at the look on her face. It’s like a mix of silent terror and excitement.

            “I have to have you swear secrecy. Like right this second and you can’t tell Fili,” she whispers. _‘She killed someone’_ is my first thought.

            “You killed someone, right? Do you need help burying the body?” I stop, lowering my voice in case Fili is listening in. “Are their multiple bodies? Is that why?” She shakes her head.

            “He asked me to marry him,” she says in barely a whisper again and my heart leaps from my chest at the surprise. _‘No way.’_

            “Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!” I can’t believe it. “When? Like now?” She nods her head frantically. “What did you say? Please tell me that you said yes,” I grimace realizing that she might have acted a bit too quickly and come here early instead of staying with him.

            “I was really shocked and-and-uh I just stared at him. I just stared at him and we laid there and-uh were silent,” she stammers but I don’t see why she’s so upset about it. “Oh no,” she whispers with wide eyes.

            “Oh no. You didn’t,” I trail off worriedly. She must have not said anything and literally come straight here. “Please tell me you didn’t,” I mutter again. _‘She ran out’_ I fill in.

            “Uh oh,” she whispers. _‘Idiot!’_ I scoff and shake my head.

            I grab her hand and steer her toward the door. “You’re being stupid about this. Fili I’m going out for a moment!” I yell to him through the door and drag her out of the door at a breakneck pace. “You’re going to go in there and apologize to him and then you’re going to say yes, if that’s what you want of course,” I add quickly as we reach the door to their chambers.

            “I do want to marry him I’m just really really surprised! I can’t believe he asked me and I don’t want to let him down,” she rushes out in one breath but I’m less convinced about it all.

            “Then you have to tell him that.” The room is silent besides the sound of the crackling fire on the opposite side of the room as I see him sitting there on the bench in front of their bed. _‘Oh no.’_ “Thorin?” He looks up with a straight face that reminds me of when we first met him.

            “She left me.” The silence after that statement is deafening until I sigh, causing him to look up from the ground.

            “Let me guess: She flopped around for a second when you proposed and then ran directly out of the room without telling you what she was doing or where she was going and all probably while making a noise resembling a wounded animal?”

            He nods thoughtfully after thinking about it after a second. “I should have known she would tell you of her unwillingness to marry me,” he rumbles from the couch.

            “Alright, that’s completely false.” He snaps his head to look at me with wide eyes. “This is most likely one of the biggest shocks of her life, and you know she loves you a lot,” I explain gently but he looks unconvinced as he scoffs. _‘I’ll show him. Where is she anyway?’_ I think with irritation. “Get your ass in here right now!” I yell to Clara who is still standing in the first section of the room most likely being all nervous like usual. “Tell him what you told me,” I prompt her expectantly with a nod toward the sullen dwarf on the bench. “Stop being so nervous and get on with it!”

            She looks over to me and then back to Thorin with big eyes. “Um, I ran out because I was surprised, like really surprised, because I never thought this would happen to me. Ever.” _‘Such eloquence’_ I think with an internal chuckle. “I thought I would never find someone who would want to live with me and love me like. . . This” she flails around like a windmill before laughing brightly in embarrassment, “and I freaked out. I’m sorry.” _‘Oh yeah you did.’_

            I stand in the doorway with my hand over my mouth watching as she stumbles and stutters all the while Thorin is obviously holding in laughter or at the very least a smile while she stresses higher and higher in front of him.

            “Get to the point,” I remind her before she gets too off track.

            She shakes her head and makes a distressed noise before sighing. “Yes. Yes! I want to marry you. I want to spend every day with you whether or not you frustrate me that day. Yes, I want to grow old with you and worry about the kingdom with you and everything. I won’t be the easiest person to get along with but you want me so I guess that counts for something. . .” she peeters off at the end and I smile at the awkwardness of it all. “I love you.”

            It feels like I’m watching a romantic drama movie as Thorin sweeps her clean up off of the ground in one swoop and places, what looks like, a strong kiss to end it all. “Woohoo!” I yell as she gets set back down on her feet and they kiss more and more until I think I should probably get going before they start taking off their clothes. “Congratulations to you both but good night!”

            “You’re not sworn to secrecy anymore!” I hear her shout as I leave the bedroom and I smile to myself. This news is going to spread like wildfire in California on the dry season.

            “Fili! You would never guess what just happened,” I draw out to him as I come into the room and then slither under the cool sheets to find him on his side of the bed. He lets out a light groan before rolling over and placing a sweet kiss on my lips without the feeling of the beads on his mustache. He drives me crazy even when he’s not trying to! His feel, his smell, his everything makes my brain go fuzzy like white noise. _‘Focus!’_

            “That uncle and Clara got in another argument?” he guesses and I chuckle softly.

            “They’re engaged,” I whisper in his ear as he turns onto his back. That sure wakes him up quickly. I’m pushed off of his chest as he sits up suddenly and stares at me through the darkness of the room.

            From knowing him so well he must have his surprised and happy face on where his mouth is a large smile but the corners of his eyes are pinched and his forehead is bunched. “What? Wait, you’re serious?” he asks with a disbelieving laugh. I nod my head knowing that he’ll see it through the darkness. “That’s fantastic news indeed, but I have court tomorrow, we have court tomorrow,” he corrects, “and we should look well rested for it,” he finishes with a gentle peck on my nose. I snuggle into the soft covers and into his warm side where I feel

            He’s right though. Tomorrow is going to be a big day with all of the new lords and ladies introducing themselves by family and house, and honestly, I just hope that everything goes well.

           


	9. Something More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena and Clara have to face more difficulties becoming royalty as more and more players come onto their chess board, looking for ways into their lives and into their home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own the Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Thank you so much for keeping up with this story and I'm sorry for not updating since then because it's been so crazy in my life! I have some different ways for the story to go but I don't know for sure right now. Have a great time reading!
> 
> Inspiration for Daria's dress:  
> https://www.etsy.com/listing/157937525/for-orders-only-custom-made-1800s?utm_source=Pinterest&utm_medium=PageTools&utm_campaign=Share  
> Siga's dress:  
> https://www.pinterest.com/pin/634022453772200723/  
> Clara's dress:  
> https://www.fabbily.com/products/copy-of-exclusive-heavy-designer-beautiful-bridal-red-color-floral-design-bridal-lehenga-choli  
> Lena's dress:  
> https://www.perniaspopupshop.com/anushree-lilac-floral-pannel-gathered-maxi-dress-arec02061706.html

**Chapter 9**

Third person POV

            This isn’t how they expected it to end. The two girls surrounded by short nobles dressed in their finery filling the great hall in throngs and crowds ready to lay eyes on their new king and their princes. The girls both stand on the other side of the great entrance behind the thick doors that aren’t nearly thick enough to block out the waves of sound coming from the hall. There is a laugh here, a gasp here but mostly it’s like a wave of whispers coming to devour them, or at least that’s what it feels like.

            Thorin. Dressed in his finery he looks the part of a true king. He wears similar robes like when he had dragon sickness but the chill of his glare isn’t in his blue eyes and his actions are calmer than before. He doesn’t wear the geometric crown on his head because there hasn’t been an official coronation, as he explained when Clara had innocently wondered, but he still looks intimidating with his own crown of silver and raven black hair. Clara has to look past all of the pomp and circumstance to see her Thorin under it all and look past the duty and remember the moments where her husband was carefree and light.

            “Stand strong,” Thorin whispers as he leans into Clara’s side but not close enough to touch her and comfort her against what they might be facing. She nods her head and sends one more brief glance to her friend behind her who stands side by side with Fili with Kili behind them as well. Dís stands between them as they’re all in order of how the throne will be passed down in the family: First Dís will be given the throne but not the crown until it is passed to Fili and then Kili.

            “Thorin, son of Thrain, son of Thror, King of Erebor!” the guards on the other side of the door calls to the crowd and the sounds disappear in their anticipation almost immediately.

            The heavy doors open with a groan and whoosh as the air sweeps past them causing their clothes to billow and their loose pieces of hair to swirl around their faces like leaves in autumn. Clara feels her palms become clammy as the people part into a wide path for them to walk down. _‘Parting the sea indeed’_ she jokes to herself nervously.

            Clara keeps her eyes focused forward, directly on the throne as she follows behind Thorin. Lena keeps her eyes on the throne at first and when that gets blocked from her view she focuses on the back of Clara’s braids to avoid looking around at all of the eyes on her. Out of the corner of her eye, Lena sees the people closest to them bow and curtsey nearly to the floor with their dresses and cloaks touching the ground.

            They had been briefed on the proceeding for today where Thorin would enter first and sit while the other royals (now including Lena and Clara) would trail behind him and then stand to the sides of the throne. Clara to his left with Dís beside her, Fili directly to his right partnered with Lena, and finally Kili on Lena’s right.

            The sheer amount of eyes on them is suffocating. Lena feels the urge to look out and around them to take in every detail but she knows she would look stupid stopping in her tracks during a royal entrance that has been so dramatic so far, so she pushes that urge down as she puts one foot in front of the other. She worries to herself about tripping over the dress material pooling and swishing around her feet and ankles, silently threating to give her a spot on the floor to fall face first into, but the platform is only a few more yards away to give her hope of making it.

            Clara feels like she’s about to puke. _‘Breathe’_ she reminds herself silently, knowing that when they get to the throne they’ll still be observed but she can relax knowing that all she has to do is stand there and not speak. She lifts the edge of her dress to avoid tripping on the dais as she follows Thorin and they spread themselves out like they had talked about. She gazes out on all of the people present and they seem to spread from wall to wall and are all crowded to see their king and the royal family.

            The atmosphere shifts when Thorin turns to face the crowd and sits on the tall, ornately decorated throne. The silence is ringing in the large chamber as they are focused on Thorin and what he might say or what he might do while the sound of shuffling clothes and feet fill the silence.

            “People of Erebor, the Iron Hills, Ered Luin, and Ered Mithrin. Once more is Erebor the rightful home to dwarves across Middle Earth!” he booms from the front of the hall, the echoes bouncing across and around the walls leading into a loud roar from the crowd at the proud statement. “We have reclaimed it from Smaug the terrible and welcome those who have traveled far and wide to reside here,” he continues strongly as he launches further into his grand speech.

            Clara feels eyes on her, looking her up and down as she knows those who see her know what her position is with Thorin and most likely are starting to become jealous of her already. Lena tries not to shift on her feet from nerves as Thorin continues his welcome speech that ends in another roaring applause from the people in front of them, the sound hitting her in the face like a wall and bringing her back to the present.

            The families begin to step forward from the crowd that is forming some sort of line system that spans across the whole length of the hall. _‘Here we go’_ she tells herself silently and prepares for a long day listening to other people and standing silently.

            The first family to step up has both parents and one daughter dressed wildly with their eyes hungry and their pockets open most likely. “Your majesty!” the father calls to Thorin too enthusiastically for Clara’s liking. Both mother and daughter are dressed to the nines as they bow theatrically, the women bowing almost to the ground while their ribbons wrapped around their waist nearly drag along the stone.

            “I am Barshok, son of Bartok. This is my wife Drava and my daughter Daria. Thank you, your grace, for allowing us to stay in your kingdom-,” he says as he goes on and on with flattery and ideas, suggesting and trying to get Daria and his wife into the court or in a higher position than they are already in.

 _‘Daria kind of looks like a bitch’_ Clara thinks as she looks at the dwarrow. The girl has a fairly pretty face but her eyes roll over Thorin like a cat eyeing a mouse. Her strawberry blonde hair is braided around her head Game of Thrones style with a large bulging section on top of her head and a roll of braids intertwined and covered with jeweled beads sitting on top of that. The strands that hang down past her shoulders and trailing over the front of her gaudy and frilly blue dress make her look crazy. Her beard is thick along the line of her cheekbones and comes down into one thin braid with a gem bead on the end. _‘Looks like an upside-down teardrop’_ Clara thinks suddenly.

            It’s clear they’re trying to make their family seem appealing yet friendly in hopes that we’ll cozy up to them in the future. They keep blabbering on until Thorin nods and lifts one hand from the armrest to stop Barshok in his tracks and signal him to move on to the next family without another word.

 _‘We’re not cozying up on my watch’_ she tells herself. A few more families come through and it looks like Lena has her own competition with Fili and the new ladies. Siga, another short and stout girl with overflowing breasts, a long beard and round ended nose actually has the gall to look Lena up and down in disdain and then lock gazes with Fili with an oil slick smile on her face with crooked teeth beaming at him.

             Fili watches as the ornately dressed dwarf women look him up and down like eyeing a piece of meat and he only feels his stomach turn sour. The only woman he would want to look at him that way is Lena but he knows this is a part of being a prince and the first to the throne after Thorin. He worries about this infatuation that these women must be harboring and brewing in their minds to either gain the crown, the wealth that the heroes of Erebor would receive, or worse, both.

             “Keep your knees bent or you’ll faint,” Dís whispers softly to Clara with a smirk dancing at the corners of her mouth near the halfway point of the guests. Clara nearly snorts as she thinks of the scene that would cause and how she would probably die of embarrassment and the teasing the company would give her. The women in the room would probably “rush to help” her, but most of her energy is still being spent glaring at men who gaze at her with too much longing or sending women the same amount of venom to keep them away from Thorin.

             The elaborate introductions go on for so long it reminds the girls of the drab nature of council and how the lords will sometimes be in moods to one up each other and try to make each other look like fools with insults and snide comments. It’s taking so long that Fili and Kili both seem restless to Lena who is nearly at her bursting point and is holding it together by the threads of her sanity. _‘It’s almost done. Don’t fall over. Damn it’s hot in here’_ she thinks as the long overcoat and pants under it grow very warm suddenly in the hall like someone lit a fire making it difficult to breathe.

             They all finally stop coming up once Thorin takes the initiative to stand from his throne as a cut off, leaving everyone still in line disappointed at the chance of not being able to show themselves off like mating birds of paradise, each one trying to outdo the other.

 _‘I’ll take that as we’re done’_ Clara breathes happily as her attention is starting to wander, and it would have if Thorin and Dís weren’t on either side of her to silently remind her every time to stay still as she goes to turn her head and look around the hall. The two girls would look like children in these proceedings if they lost their concentration.

              Lena’s attention snaps back into focus as Fili nudges her to step off of the dais and file out of the hall, once again walking through all of the people that create a large path for them. They fold toward each other as Thorin takes the lead and leaves Clara walking behind him when she hears a snort to her left. A brief glance as she walks past shows Daria, still in a curtsey, with a sly smile on her face and challenging eye contact with Clara.

             As the doors close behind them, Clara lets out a soft sigh that turns Lena’s head and Fili’s head as well. “Jesus Christ!” she puffs as she takes the hem of her dress in her hands and fans the hot air to cool her legs. “I think that we have competition for our men,” she explains with a frown and Lena rolls her eyes while the others look at her begrudgingly and slightly like she’s insane.

            “Yeah I saw that too,” she agrees with her own matching sigh. “But Fili is mine. I don’t plan on sharing with any of those women out there,” she finishes with a tight-lipped look back at the door.

             Fili smiles at that. “It is always bound to happen with nearly everyone. There are countless times where women or powerful families have tried to flirt with or become close to us and this time will be no different,” he explains to Lena with a small squeeze to her hand and a peck on her cheek.

            “You’re mine and you’re right,” she looks at him as he pauses and slowly comes closer for effect, “you’re mine and I don’t intend on sharing you with anyone.” She smiles as he comes up and steals a sweet kiss on her lips and then blushes a bit realizing that they’re all still in each other’s company, especially in his mother’s company.

            “I don’t intend to share you with anyone either. Would you like to tell them?” Clara asks Thorin in a hushed whisper but it’s not quiet enough to stop Dís from overhearing her.

            “Why don’t you,” he responds silently as he rolls his shoulders tiredly. The cloak must weigh a ton on his shoulders after all that time.

            “Is there something that you haven’t told us, uncle?” Kili asks with a side glance toward his mother.

            “We’re not about to share each other at all because Thorin asked me to marry him.” A smile creeps over her face the closer she gets to the ending until it’s beaming brighter than the sun. There’s a moment of shock around the room comes from Kili and Dís as Fili and Lena share the same beaming expression as Clara. Thorin’s mouth curls up at the edges as he watches his family smile and approves of this choice of marrying the woman that he loves.

             Congratulations are passed around as well as embraces before they all sober up. “Come both of you,” Dís instructs the two girls away from the group with one more farewell look backward until they arrive in another room like a lounge but lighter. Dis turns and assesses the girls with a once over glance. _‘I have a bad feeling about this’_ Clara thinks as her stomach turns.

            “Now that a majority of the ladies and lords have been announced, you both will have to choose some to become your ladies in waiting,” she explains and both of the girls blanch.

            “Ladies in what?” Lena asks with a confused and scrunched expression and Clara’s expression is a grimace.

            “I think they’re like girls who follow you around and agree with you on stuff they don’t like and you sew in circles,” she whispers but Dís obviously hears her.

            Dís scoffs at Clara’s over-arching statement with an offended look that silently tells her to behave. “It is much more than that. This is how you get lords and ladies to respect you as well as approve of you and my brother together,” she pointedly stares at Clara who bristles at the statement.

            “I’m getting married to Thorin whether or not these women like me! It is me and Thorin together. If these ladies had it their way they would swoop Thorin up for themselves and take advantage of him. Did you even see how they looked at him and at Fili?” she brings up as she looks over to Lena who nods her head in agreement.

            Dís is silent a moment as she looks over the two who look wide and glassy eyed. “I understand that you are both nervous about this but you must remember that this is for the sake of the whole mountain. We cannot keep ourselves shut up in the royal wing at all hours of the day. We must show that we are willing to engage with everyone.”

            “You trust them?” Clara whispers disbelievingly, hoping, praying really that she doesn’t say yes.

            Dís takes her sweet time as she turns around to pour wine into a silver goblet sitting next to the bottle taking one sip and thinks for a moment about what Clara said when in reality it seems like she’s ignoring the girl. She’s about to take another sip but then stops and turns around to look at the two of them, really look at them both. She sees them standing there like apprehensive and curious cats looking at something they don’t comprehend.

           “To answer your question, Clara,” she begins but Lena doesn’t like the direction this is going with that grave tone. “I did see how they were looking at my brother and my babies,” she emphasizes with a dangerous edge in her voice, “and I will tell you this only once: I do not trust them. We may entertain them, we may choose them to be our ladies in waiting, but we do not trust them without real cause.” Her eyes are stony and her lips are set in a hard line.

            Lena feels the worry in her gut melt away and the buzzing in her head become silent at that statement and that look. “Good,” she cuts in simply. There doesn’t have to be any more talks about whether or not Dís supports them being with her son and her brother. She doesn’t have to worry about if the black haired dwarf is out to embarrass them in front of the people, now their people, but now they can finally breathe in relief.

            “Now then let’s get choosing and we can get our court up and running,” she turns back to the girls after sitting herself on a sofa with a glee smile on her face, “and we have a coronation to prepare for.” _‘Wait what?’_ Clara thinks in dumb shock still.

            “Wait, when is the coronation?” she asks slowly. “This is the first time that we’ve really heard about it since we found out and to be honest I have no idea when it is,” she ends in a whisper as the lady in front of them looks at the pair first with a blank expression and as Clara continues it becomes incredulous so Clara stops talking for fear that she’d be thought of as a complete idiot.

            There is silence between them for a tense few seconds before Dís purses her lips and then shakes her head. “You two have really been letting your heads wander through the clouds,” she tisks at them as Lena bristles at the tone and the implication of those words.

            _‘We’ve been doing nothing?_ ’ Her anger builds up like an engine holding in steam with a lid. “Are you kidding me! We’ve been helping with the restorations, we helped with the battle, and hell we died!” she blurts out as the anger becomes too much to handle. “I’ve been helping in the library with the others while Clara has been working her ass off in the stables! The last thing we have been doing is keeping our heads in the clouds!” Clara slowly looks over at her friend with wide eyes while Dís stares right into Lena’s eyes like a challenge to dare her to look away, a dare to back down.

            “Wow, calm then,” Clara whispers to Lena with another wide-eyed roll. “She’s right. We haven’t heard anything about the coronation before you arrived. We learned about it when we learned you were almost here,” she tells Dís while trying not sound like an idiot again but trying to not let herself be run over by this new power figure emerging in their lives. “We’d really like to learn as much as we can about this,” she amends, appealing to the woman’s good side and subtly flattering her intelligent side.

            Dís sits there for a moment, fingers tracing her wine glass, considering both of their words before nodding. “What did you mean by ‘you died’?” Her brow pinches as she tries to figure out what they could possibly mean by that.

            Clara is the one to step up to the plate for that question. “Well, you see, we died. And not metaphorically or jokingly. We actually died during the battle and were brought back to life during our own funeral.” The dams eyes widen and her mouth hangs open as she tries to find words to express her shock until her shock morphs into a smile and disbelieving laugh.

            “Clearly you both have wildly active imaginations,” she mutters after a moment.

            “I wish,” mutters Lena. She grabs her own goblet of wine from the table and takes a small sip cringing as she remembers the sweet taste of Thranduil’s wine and the taste of the dwarf liquor in her own room that caused her so many problems. She sighs before taking another sip and runs her fingers along the smooth and cold metal.

            “No, we really died and then came back to life by gods if there are any out there,” Clara repeats because Dís is still looking at them like they’re crazy. “Do you want to see the scars? They’re pretty cool, I mean if you think gnarly scars are interesting,” she cuts herself off as she puts one hand on the laces of her dress when Dís’s mouth opens wider than before in shock. “Okay,” she drawls, “maybe another time then,” she decides dismissively, sending her attention elsewhere and letting silence reign in the lounge.

             Dís nods slowly as she contemplates this new news. “Aye and that is good. I didn’t mean to elicit such an outburst from you dear,” she nods to Lena before nodding to herself once again, “Now let us put aside these darker feelings to make decisions on ladies for court and for those who we want to keep our eye on,” she tilts her head toward them and widens one eye before winking good-naturedly. _‘Seriously this woman is giving me whiplash!’_ Lena thinks to herself with a relieved sigh.

             They decide on a total of seven dwarrowdams to come together when both Lena and Clara are in the same room. Of course, both Daria and Siga are in the group along with a few other notable women but those were the two Dís chose while Clara and Lena chose some less confronting and argumentative women to balance out the strong forces that they are both worried about for the coming days.

            “We also need to get you measured for a wedding dress and you both a gown for the coronation,” she mentions as though they’re just checks on the to-do list like getting vegetables or making the bed in the morning (although the servants do that for them which they still haven’t gotten used to). “Well then I guess we had better get it done already. I’ll send for one of the best seamstresses in the mountain and we will-,” she stops short when she sees the grimace on their faces, Lena’s especially. “What is it?”

            “We’ve had a few problems with the seamstresses here because we aren’t as. . .full figured as other people and it was stressful to say the least to find styles that would look good on us.”

            “We actually have Dori help us with designs and with what would still be appropriate here with a different style and everything,” Clara adds knowingly looking into her own glass.

            “You say things about a different style as though you don’t know anything about dress styles in the first place,” she chuckles then grows curious. “Where are the two of you from any way, I forgot to ask?”

             They exchange small glances before looking away. “The north,” Clara supplies quietly as she sips her own sweet drink.

             A scoff rings through the quiet room as she shakes her head at such a bull shit answer. “I’m not blind, dear. I can clearly realize that you are being vague for reason unknown to me but I don’t doubt you if that’s what you’re worried about. My brother and my sons love you dearly and you both make them happy, therefore, you make me happy as well. Clara, you will soon be family so you can trust me with your secrets if you wish,” she reassures the, once again, nervous girls.

            “I’m sure that we’ll tell you in time but we should get along with the rest of our days because our secrets are very big and very long, too long to tell right now without taking up the whole day.” _‘That’s what she said’_ she thinks to herself before taking another long draw of the dark wine, putting the glass on the table next to the decanter, wiping her mouth with her index and thumb before leaving with a nod and a smile.

            The walk down the hall is quiet despite the bustling and scrapping of feet against the stone floor letting Clara and Jorah slip past in side halls unannounced and unnoticed like she likes. When crowds see her or Lena they tend to bow, make a scene too, and they try to pull her away from her own tasks to show her their projects in order to get praise and admiration. Today is not the day for that. _‘I’ve had enough of bowing for one day’_ she huffs internally as people pass by with their heads down.

             “-But mother they’re men! You don’t really expect me to-,” the shrill cry gets cut off by another woman’s voice so Clara turns the corner and grips Jorah’s coat to keep him out of sight of the two.

             “Daria we will not speak of that here.” The voice is sharp like the crack of a whip. “They may only be daughters of men but you are the daughter of a wealthy and strong lord,” she coos sweetly continuing, “Do you not understand, my love, that you are so close to being royalty? Those two will burn themselves out before you know it and you will become close to the king to take her place. Don’t fret my love, we will get there,” she whispers finally and Clara’s blood runs hot and her hands curl into white-knuckled fists at her side. _‘Breathe and get out of here’_ she tells herself.

              Clara rounds the corner and like she thought, Daria and her scheming mother are standing only a few meters down the hall huddled together like mourning doves cooing and calling, and the anger runs through her so hot that she nearly forgets to acknowledge them when they say hello to her brightly as if they were friends.

             “Afternoon ladies.” Her tone is crisp and far from amicable as she walks directly past both of them without another look as she tries to restrain herself from breaking either of their noses with either a curb stomp or with her knuckles.

              Jorah has the gall to stop her by placing his meaty hands on her shoulders and turns her around to be face to face with him after they are for sure out of the hearing range of the two dwarfs. He looks beyond pissed, steaming mad, and before Clara has the chance to open her mouth he charges ahead. “Clara what they spoke of is treason against you which is treason against the king. We both know that means either exile-,”

             “Or execution. I know so I’m going to let them hang themselves instead of letting them atone,” she spits out. “I knew I didn’t like them but I’ll weed them out before they do any real damage. Let’s keep going about the day but we won’t forget this at all.” _‘I know I won’t.’_ Jorah nods and follows as she walks them both into the belly of the mountain.

              Lena fiddles with her dress in front of her before letting out a long sigh feeling like there are too many awkward silences coming up between her and Dís as they run out of things to say and comments to make after Clara’s exit.

             “I should get going as well to finish helping in the library, or at the least see the progress that’s being made. Thank you for helping us figure this all out because we really appreciate it and we know that we would be lost without it,” she nods respectfully. _‘I can’t stay here anymore.’_ She rushes herself to the door after that, taking Harfur from the other side of the door with her to the library just in case anyone decides to pull her over for anything like being a well dressed human.

              The rest of the day goes by without any problem, the two girls going about their business checking on the library and checking on the stables and then returning to their duties like court, signing documents, and helping Fili and Thorin with their daily tasks that seem to grow every day. The biggest tasks at the moment are signing sheets about new trade that will come now that the settlers have arrived bringing leads with them and new goods to sell.

             “Fili?”

             “Yes love?” he turns away from his work to look over her shoulder and scan the sheet with tired eyes.

             “How much is all of this worth, you know the stuff coming in? There are so many goods and materials that seem expensive but I have no idea how much is actually here,” she sighs, putting her head in her hands as the papers crumple and fold under the weight. “I honestly don’t know what needs signing on this one. It seems pretty self-explanatory besides all the stuff it’s listing here but I just don’t know,” she continues pushing the parchment toward him as her head hangs limply in her hands.

             “Well this looks to be one page that is missing its others and that is why there is no place for a signature. Wait, have you been signing these like this?” He points to her signature with a crimp in his brow and his mouth turned into a frown.

              She looks at him sideways out of the corner of her eye and then glances back to her signature. Cold panic creeps up her veins. If she did this wrong then all papers she signed will have to be null and void. “That is always how I’ve always signed by name. I don’t see how that would be a problem. Is it a problem? I was supposed to sign there right?”

              He shifts uncomfortably on his feet, not knowing how to tell his love that he can barely read her name beside the loopy ‘L’ at the beginning among the scratch on the parchment. “Well, um, uh, you see most people don’t write quite in the same style as you do and so this is, uh, difficult to read. I am unable to read it,” he finishes shyly and scratches the back of his neck uncomfortably.

 _‘Wait what?’_ “But this is my signature,” she points to it incredulously again. “It says Lena Wilson like right there though,” she taps the parchment with her index finger. As she waits for a response she taps the parchment again listening to the dry noise come from it.

              Fili still doesn’t begin to understand the curly letters written out in small font in front of him so he simply nods his head slowly as he thinks of what to say to her, only to come up with nothing after a few moments. “Um, of course I see can, um. . .” he trails off as he squints at the letters only to again come up with no possible understanding of it. “I’m sorry love I can’t read this,” he breaks and shakes his head with a shrug of his shoulders.

             “So I bet you won’t have any hope of reading this whole page of offers, memos, and permits that I wrote.” Fili gapes at how many foreign letters and characters are lining the page that he fails to comprehend and he gives Lena a hint of doubt as he goes over the page once more. The letters aren't coming to him any faster than before. He gives the page one more blank look before setting the sheet down ruefully. “That’s what I thought,” she hums dryly with a sag of her body.

             “I'm sorry I didn't notice that earlier. Do you think you can teach me to read your script, love?” he kisses her neck gently as his hot torso drapes over her back, making her shiver at his touch.

             “I think I could manage that,” she giggles but pulls away as Fili places vigorous kisses to her neck, “BUT only if you decide to be a dutiful student,” she mutters with a playful swat to his arms that hold her tightly to him.

             “I think I can live with that. Shall we get to work then?” he hums lowly in her ear, his hot breath moving across her skin and making her shiver again. _‘Yes, yes we shall’_ she responds silently as he takes the sheet in one hand, her soft hand in the other, into the lounge room past the double doors with the soft couches and supple bed waiting for them on the other side and a pair of arms to hold each other for the rest of their time.


	10. Long Live the King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's coronation day while Clara and Lena arrange surprises for Thorin, and are met with a few surprises of their own. More pressures are being put on them as their roles of queens are growing steadily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own. 
> 
> Oh WOW! What a summer! I'm glad that I could knock this out as one of my longer chapters and I love the love that you're all giving. I hope you enjoy this one just as much, and try to stay cool in the heat!  
> Thanks again
> 
> Lena's dress:  
> https://www.pinterest.com/pin/634022453772507047/  
> Hair:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/yx1iDqawDo6fudPC9  
> Clara's dress:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/jH66LDAGw3JiaWWY9  
> Hair:  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/iagNjXuQ7bEYA1Gp6

**Chapter 10**

Clara POV

            “You look so perfect baby,” I whisper to him in awe as he stands in front of the full-length mirror wearing a royal robe made of a heavy and deep black fabric lined with rich grey furs at the shoulders and lining at the bottom trailing along the ground to create a train. His hair is simply braided at his temples with his fanciest silver clasps while the other strands are left to hang over his shoulders. The long locks have been carefully brushed out to become a comprehensive unit instead of strands sticking out every which way.

            “Are you nervous?” I wonder quietly and rest my head on my bent knees as he looks at me, no, into me, ‘ _but that’s pretty usual for his looks’_ I think. The fine fabric feels soft on my face but the torso built-in corset is restricting. It’s fairly early in the morning to get ready for the coronation but I wish that was the only thing we had to worry about for today. There’s the coronation to rehearse, the party to plan for with the feast, and then the worst part of all; socializing.

            “You wish for the truth?” he rumbles and I nod my head a little letting my face smoosh against the fabric of my dress making me look like floppy dough in fine clothes. “I am nervous but not about this.” _‘Cryptic’_ but just make a face that says ‘sounds fair’ and shrug.

            “Then what?” I ask as he fixes imperceptible mistakes on his clothing and hair while he thinks of an answer, although it’s feeling like he’s avoiding it.

            “I am finally getting it, Clara. I have everything that I have wanted since it was taken from me, from us,” he responds stoically but I can tell he’s feeling a tsunami of emotions under his façade of a cool leader. I’ve seen those brows bunch and his mouth turn down into a grimace so many time I might as well be the Thorin whisperer. I stride from the bed to stand behind him, close enough that the furs around his neck my chest that’s exposed from the gown, and his comforting warmth bleeds into me.

            I grip his hands lightly in mine to get him to focus on the conversation instead of projecting onto other things and bring our hands down to his belly so we’re wrapped around each other. “And now that you’re getting everything you wanted it feels different than you imagined? It’s not like you dreamed?” I pry further hoping to get him to open up about this. Although being his fiancé gives me more access to his lesser shown emotions he naturally broods and unconsciously puts up this wall of emotions that can be challenging to decipher.

            He scoffs lightly. “I never imagined that we would survive the battle or the dragon or that I would have a future wife. I never dreamed that I would be as lucky and wealthy beyond gold and jewels that my companions would all be here safe as well. My family is restored, Clara. It is not what I imagined because it is more than I could ever imagine.” His voice grows as soft as his rumble can become but I know what he means.

            I swallow thickly as my throat has developed a lump near the middle of his explanation and my emotions are tripping me up before anything exciting has even happened today! “Oh, well then, is that all?” I brush off jokingly, resting my chin on the top of his head and then scoff, smiling stupidly as a smile emerges on his face at the same time.

           “Well then, my king, you will get exactly what you want and more seeing as I have some surprises for you, and I have sworn everyone to secrecy on what they are so good luck finding out what they are beforehand!” I gloat with a nudge to his arm as I lock my bottom lip into my teeth with a silly expression.

           “What-Clara-But-,” he stutters incredulously and I shake my head again.

           “Nope! No more questions about it! We have to go and get the finishing touches done like. . .?” I prompt again seeing as I know the basic form of the coronation but nothing like what will really happen. I am not quite sure how this is all going to work out.

            He smirks at my crappy diversion. “I have to review the oath and you need to review the oath as well since it will be in Khuzdul,” he reminds me gently so I nod.

           “Of course I think that may be a tad challenging,” I tease him and then stifle my chuckle at his frown. “I hope you know how much I love you. Once all of this ceremony stuff is over I’ll be waiting to spend a very, very long time with you. I love you so stupidly much Thorin,” I whisper. My heart is giddy with so many emotions it feels like butterflies trying to flutter out of the beating muscle.

           “As do I.” With that said we part ways for a little while, practicing our own vows and speeches as I walk from place to place, everyone around me scuttling around with either decorations, flowers, or fancy clothes of their own.

           “Lena?” I call into their empty room and see a peep of a head in the space by the door. There’s a grunt here and a swear word there but nothing acknowledging my call to her. I pop my head into the bathroom and my mouth falls open at the sight: she has both of her arms tangled in long strings that go to the lacing in the back of her dress and her face is red and sweat covered. “You look like you could use a hand or two.”

           “AH!” She turns around and then crumples onto the settee near the mirror with a defeated expression when she realizes it’s just me. “It’s stuck and I’ve been stuck like this for like twenty minutes and I can’t get it off! Help me!” she whines angrily with another tug on the strings only to get them tightened more. When she tries to tug again, the noise she makes makes my heart hurt.

             I smile sadly at her distress. “Oh honey! Hold still for a sec and I’ll untangle you.” The strings are knotted around her wrists and between her fingers so I take her elbow, already bent behind her back, and gently unbind her from the thick laces. “There you go! So tell me what you’ve been up to this morning and I’ll do you up in the back, okay?,” I nod to her in the reflection and she nods as well after a few deep breaths.

             “Well it’s been pretty crazy here,” she winces as I give a harsh tug on the laces to begin tightening, “Fili got up at dawn and left with Kili somewhere so there’s that.” Another tug pulls her backward. “Um, I’ve been battling with this dress for like the rest of the morning,” she explains with a wave of her hand. “There are like twenty layers on this and it’s already really hot! I don’t want to do this! Damnit! And I wanted to wear dress pants!” she sighs and it turns into a wheeze as I give a final tug and tie the laces before tucking them in.

             “Well I think that you look beautiful and I don’t really want to do this either. There’s going to be a lot of sucking up and a lot of standing in hot places,” I complain in unison with the short blonde as I look for somewhere to sit thinking of how I’ll stand through the whole ceremony- oh shit! _‘The ceremony!’_ I remember suddenly. We should be there right now!

              “Shit we have to go!” I grab her arm and I’m not even sure she’s wearing shoes! “The rehearsal is right now and we have to be there like right now!” Her eyes widen too and she forgets her shoes as we both run, trying to sprint, out the door to the throne room leaving Jorah and Harfur looking at us with shock.

              “Shit, fuck!” I pant as my hips twist because of how many layers I have to run in and the stiff upper half that is restricting my movement. We might as well be Olympic athletes with how fast we’re running and how many stairs we have to descend in such a short amount of time. I suddenly have an errant thought about using our skirts like Mary Poppin’s umbrella and float down the stairs but I know it would only lead to a long fall and even harder landing.

              Sweat is forming on my forehead and I’m pretty sure my face is turning red with all of this exertion. Lena is panting just as hard as I am as we reach the tall wooden doors where we both skid to a stop. She bends over to rest her hands on her knees and breathes so heavily that it echoes in the space before the throne room.

             “You okay?” I check as I begin to pant just as heavily, my heart literally beating in every inch of my skin like I’m about to explode. We barely even notice the doors opening to reveal the royal family on the dais looking at both of us hunched over looking like we’ve done a marathon. I try to straighten out a little while Lena is still gasping.

             “Yeah we got to go,” she wheezes and reaches back like she’s going to unlace her dress but after a few lame attempts she forgets it and continues panting. I smack her arm and point at the open doors and she straightens up immediately. “Fuck,” she draws out and looks at me with wide eyes.

             “Let’s, uh, just, you know,” I point at the entrance and begin walking slowly. Thorin looks furious but that’s alright since I was late after all.

             There is a low chuckle. “I am glad that you both could finally join us.” _‘Oh my god!’_

             “Gandalf!” We both yell and begin running again toward him dressed in grey robes carrying his tall staff, now with pieces broken off from the battle, but looking ever the wizard’s tool. It looks completely unroyal and unadult like as we’re dressed in finery, ready for a coronation and we’re running to hug, no tackle, easily one of the most powerful people in Middle Earth.

             “AH!” we cry as I reach him just a second behind Lena and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve only ever been close to him a few times but he smells completely like pipeweed, old toby to be exact. A second later there’s a throat clearing behind me causing me to look away from my tight hug and back to an extremely annoyed Thorin. _‘Shit’_ I cringe as I realize we’ve held up the whole rehearsal.

             “If you both are finished we would like to move on,” he grits tersely. I can tell we’re wearing on his patience and that the stress is already beginning to build up for today.

             “Sorry,” I mouth. Lena does the same with Fili as we take our spots, mine beside Thorin and Lena’s. The rehearsal proceeds as planned and I’m pretty sure I’m ready to stand in front of the whole kingdom. The guards are buzzing around as they check the entrances and balconies where they will let people watch the coronation from. The hall is only so large and only so many people can fit in so Fili decided it would be good to look up not out.

             “Clara I cannot be reminding you of these important events every minute of-,” Thorin begins angrily but I interrupt him with a quick hand up.

             “I know and I really am sorry about being late. I was helping Lena with her dress – she was stuck,” I supply at his looks of annoyance, “and I won’t be late for the real coronation,” I assure. He purses his lips and I can tell he’s really trying not to lose his cool at me. “I know that this is important and I won’t let you down,” I promise with a smile. I grab his hands and give them a light squeeze, feeling his rough, large fingers in mine and I sigh as I look over his shoulder. I shrug my shoulders lowly and dramatically as I look to the ground.

               His expressions tells me he notices I’m being dramatic but after knowing me this long he won’t outright ask what it is. “Well, I know this day is already special but I still just feel like something must be missing.” I look past his head without a further explanation and towards the door making eye contact with the light brown eyes and mop of sandy brown hair slowly approaching us. Thorin grips my hand tighter as he tries to get my attention back but after a moment he gives up and looks behind him, looks back at me and then does another double take.

              “Surprise,” I whisper with a smile. Thorin’s expression is priceless because at the center of the great hall stands Bilbo Baggins, the one and only burglar and hobbit of the company of Thorin Oakenshield wearing his deep blue jacket, fancy collar, and golden vest beneath it. His feet are classically bare besides his tufts of fluffy hair on the tops of his feet and his toes.

              “Bilbo, my friend!” Thorin cries from his spot at the bottom of the dais with a bright smile on his face, his teeth fully showing, gleaming in the light bleeding into the room, the corners of his eyes are crinkling with pure happiness. “Oh, I have missed you! When did you arrive?” he asks as he pulls back from the embrace with his friend and I’m so glad that we went through the effort to get him here. Especially after Bag End almost being sold so it is a miracle he wanted to leave again!

             “Clara sent a raven once the snow cleared with a letter telling me everything about the coronation, the festivities, and I knew I had to come! I arrived a few days ago like a thief in the night while the others kept the secret,” he chirps back.

              His smile is a mile wide, as is everyone’s in the room from watching Thorin be this happy. “I’ve missed all of you so dearly and I am incredibly glad that I was able to get here in time,” he laughs brightly and looks around the glittering hall with an awestruck expression. “This is all so grand and it smells much less like dragon than the last time, and the travel here was remarkably less eventful than before,” he chuckles again.

              I smile from my spot at the stairs and nod at Thorin who is looking at me like I’ve delivered part of the world at his feet, his expression devoid of the anger from before. “You all knew of this?” he asks everyone on the dais and they nod their head.

             “Fili and I let him into the mountain and swore the guards to secrecy for the time being. Mother supplied the room and amenities, Bombur had the food sneaked in by Lena, and Clara sneaked in the rest of the company to see him while you were distracted with work,” Kili explains proudly with a boyish smirk on his face. We all laugh as Thorin looks bewildered at what’s happened right under his nose!

             “I am very happy to have you here. I’m so very glad that you could be here with us during this time!” He claps Bilbo on the shoulder once more before leading themselves and the other family members out of the large chamber leaving Lena, Gandalf, and myself alone.

             “We missed you Gandalf,” I gently tell him. The emptiness of the large space is like a bubble wrapped around us, keeping us held together with the silence that lingers.

              I’ve missed his gentle smile that creases the wrinkles around his kind eyes. “I have missed you both as well. It is quite less exciting without you on the road. The return trip was not as uneventful as the original,” he chuckles softly. “How are you both faring with your new lives?”

             “It was a steep learning curve but I think it’s been eventful, well more than eventful what with the assassins at first and all of the other dwarves trying to gain our position,” Lena adds at the end wryly.

             “Hm,” the wizard muses. “As expected.” I widen my eyes.

             “Um, what? As expected?” I try to stop him from walking towards the door with a hand but he plows past me in his old age with his staff and everything, his robes continuing to swish on the stone.

             “Why yes as expected, miss Clara! They are a proud people who have been waiting for this moment for a very long while and to have two new daughters of men become their queens and marry their leaders I would say jealousy is to be expected!” he tells us as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

              “I wish someone would have told us that when we started dating them,” Lena mumbles.

               Out of the corner of my eye, I see Gandalf grin and then smother it with a cough. “I do believe it would be less adventurous that way,” he smirks again under his beard.

               The rest of the morning goes by without a hitch while more decorations are being set up, people are beginning to get ready after their midday meal as they all call it, and Bard arrives right before Thranduil (who is not happy about the lack of reception from Thorin seeing as he’s getting being rushed away constantly by advisors and issues). Instead, Lena and I are on that task with the flattery, kind words, and gracious offers of rooms and meals. He scowls through the whole thing. Typical.

              “Where have you two been!” We whip around at the shrill tone of Dís as the short dwarrowdam strides, nearly flies, down the hall with her heels clacking on the stone.

              “Uh oh,” I whisper under my breath. It won’t matter if she is going to be a sister/mother in law because she’s going to be hounding us like our own mothers at this rate.

              “We were in charge of greeting Thranduil and Bard at the gates and offering them the rooms Thorin told us to give,” explains Lena. It seems to satisfy Dís enough so that a simple head nod is all we get in return. There’s a beat of silence where we’re not so sure what to do or say when I blurt out the first thing I think.

              “Would you like me to help you with anything?”

               Dís looks at me strangely before clearing her throat and straightening her shoulders. “Clara, queens,” she stresses as her eyes dramatically go over the both of us, “Create what needs to be done. They are proactive, not reactive.” The cold chill in her voice makes me crumble on the inside because I’ve done something wrong.

               I sigh and I begin to feel frustrated at this whole deal. “Fine then. I’ll make the choice to go and make Thorin rest because he’s being run ragged by the courtiers and I don’t want him to be stressed. I’ll take over his paper work for the day if he’ll let me,” I mutter the last part under my breath and scurry out of Dís’s grasp.

              “Thorin?” I call as I open the door to his small study, and unsurprisingly I find him sitting over a pile of paper word. It’s almost as sad as seeing someone having to clean at their own party and not enjoy it. “Alright that’s it!” I declare. That certainly gets his head up from the papers.

              “You look like you’re having zero fun and the way your eyebrows are scrunched together tells me that you’re getting a headache and the way your shoulders are near your ears tells me it’s a lot of tension.”

               His shoulders actively drop down, his eyes squint, and his mouth frowns like he’s trying to prove me wrong by major denial. “Am not,” he grumbles stubbornly as he turns his attention back to the parchment, his brow is still pinched and eyes squinted. I sigh gently and cross the space to stand behind him to drape myself over his back like a blanket, putting my mouth next to his ear and my hands over the back of his. “Clara I-,” he starts petulantly but I hush him softly with a kiss to his temple.

              “Today is a big day and I do know for a fact that you are stressed, and don’t try telling me that your head isn’t hurting,” I insist as he opens his mouth to protest. “Let me help you.”

               I run my hands heavily over his shoulders and move to his front, mindful not to tip over the ink or let any papers fall to the floor. Thorin shifts in his seat with a tired sigh and tries to see around me to the desk. “Come here,” I whisper gently as I card my fingers through his long locks to the base of his neck. He sighs again as his face crumples in what most likely is the pain of his headache and he leans forward into my diaphragm. His groan of relaxation makes me smile as I gently press on the muscles at the bottom of his skull that are tough as stone.  

             “Let me tell you what has already been done: Thranduil and Bard have been given rooms and Balin has chased away all of the others hounding you leaving you free to enjoy your day. Today is all about you,” I finish with a kiss to his forehead and a bright smile.

             “It will be a good day,” I whisper against the crown of his head. “No, let’s go get in our places before your sister kills us both,” I laugh with a rousing pat to his shoulder. He muffles his groan in my gown and a giddy laugh bubbles out of my mouth.

              Streams of dwarves are making their way to the great hall in their fancy dresses, their intricately sewn tunics with metals and gems, and their ornate golden and jeweled hairpieces and beads adorning their heads. It makes my heart beat faster every minute knowing that they file in into the hundreds, and when they pour into the upper levels I begin to feel faint at the thought of how many eyes are going to be on us.

             “Take a deep breath lass,” Bofur whispers to me with a smirk and a nod. “Gah,” he huffs as he looks me over at arm's length. “You look like you’re about to keel over.”

             “I’m trying,” I mumble with a tentative smile. Lena doesn’t look much better than me, and I know she has stage fright worse than I do. “Hey, you in the silver!” I joke to Lena and she looks back at me with wide eyes and parted lips. “You look how I feel,” I tell her humorously in solidarity to her fright.

             “Help. Me.” She mouths dramatically which earns a few laughs from the company.

             “Are you ready? Are we ready to begin?” I ask everyone around me, basically everyone in the company, and wait for their responses seeing as we’ve been standing here for the past twenty minutes or so. There are nods across the board and hopeful smiles from a few of them.

             “Then shall we begin?” Gandalf’s voice rings out from behind us all, causing not only me to jump and whirl around but a handful of others as well. Even in this time he’s wearing his best grey robes.  _‘Classic.’_

              The company shifts on their feet as the doors are thrown open, leaving the people outside of them to whisper with excitement at the beginning of the ceremony. I nearly stop as the sight of the decorated hall catches me off guard. The columns are decorated with tapestries decorated with scenes from the battle that could cover redwood trees in their size while a long and wide carpet spans nearly from the door to the base of the dais where Gandalf takes his place in front of the throne. The rest of us to line ourselves from left to right on either side of the throne and wait for Thorin to enter.

              My back is stiff and straight I take my place along with the others, but the eyes on us are just as intimidating as I thought. There are so many faces it looks like a sea of bobbing heads despite Thranduil and his tall guards, and Bard and his children. Tilda sends me a smile that I readily return to settle my nerves. The whispers turn to complete silence as the doors at the end of the hall open revealing Thorin looking all the king without a crown.

              As he comes closer to the front I can tell the tension rises until you can taste it in the air. It’s fairly simple in terms of the ceremony. He only needs to kneel and bow his head this once as Gandalf takes the crown off the pillow held by Balin and places it on his head.

             “Do you accept this son of Durin to be your king?” he asks the crowd.

              It’s a rhetorical question since we’re having this whole ceremony but the crowd answers with the traditional, “We accept this son of Durin to be our king,” in Khuzdul.

             “The time has come for the Mountain-king’s return,” Gandalf booms into the great hall and the silence allows his voice to echo in the great hall. Shivers creep their way up my arms and I feel tears sting at my eyes at how long we’ve all waited for this, what we’ve battled so long for and what we’re literally died for. The black and gold raven crown is placed on his head with surety then Thorin takes his place on the throne inlaid with gold, sitting over his people. “The king has come, long live the king!”

             “Long live the king!”

             “Long live the king!”

              “Long live the king!”

               The cheers following that are deafening as there are hoots, cheers, and hundreds if not nearly thousands of hands clapping for this happy time for all of them and their new king. I don’t think the smile on my face would leave even if I wanted it to. The happiness is tangible between everyone else’s cheers and smiles at their long awaited king and I couldn’t be happier. The company looks overjoyed as does Bard, and even Thranduil looks pleased.

               Thorin raises himself from the seat and lifts his hand high allowing the people calm down and become silent. “This day belongs to all dwarves across Middle Earth so now rejoice and celebrate in the rebuilding of one of the greatest kingdoms in this land!” Another rousing cheer breaks the air as he finishes, and he takes the time to look at me with a whistful expression. He nods once as I smile back.

               “At this time I will also announce my betrothal to the lady Clara Jones.” The silence is horrible as it increases until there is one clap and then another and another until they are cheering loudly about that as well, making me breathe a sigh of relief while my face is still beet red from all of the attention. “Now let us commence the celebration!” he booms finally.

               The great dining hall has been transformed into a party hall for those on the council that have been invited along with their families, Daria and Siga included. There are some friends that have also been invited like some dwarves on the guard and some others to liven up the party. Food of all sorts has been laid out on the long and grand tables with most of it consisting of hearty meats, bitter dwarf ale all around and roasted root vegetables (none of them green).

               The tables have been arranged with a head table at the back of the room for the royal family and royal guests with seats scattered across the rest of the tables for the company to sit family by family so they don’t have to endure the small talk of council members. There is a curious open space in the middle for what I think is a dance floor but I’m not too sure.

              “Do you know how to dance?” I check with Lena by nodding at the dance floor.

              “I have no idea how to dance their dances.”

               It’s odd as Fili, Kili, Thorin, Dís, Lena, and I take our seats at our table and everyone else lines up and come in groups as they bow lowly to their new official king.

              “So when are you two to be wed?” Bilbo wonders. The engagement has been the news of the night with questions about when, where, how big, what the dress will look like, how many children we’ll have (I choked on my food at that question and nearly died again), and then when Lena and Fili will get married.

               I open my mouth but Thorin beats me to the punch with a well placed, “We will wed within the coming months before autumns chill has come.” _‘That’s in a few months!’_ I think in shock. It’s near the end of summer with hot nights and even hotter days but autumn is only two or three months away. The chill sets in early so I would say it may be closer to one to two months!

              “Well, then I will have to prepare myself for the trip back here for that. I wouldn’t miss it for the world dear,” Bilbo tells me individually even though the rest of the table is listening and Balin is most likely making a mental note for how much is to be done. Lena’s mouth is hanging open in an expression that mine must also look like.

              “Bilbo, surely you could stay here for the time being. It would be no inconvenience to have you here for a time.” Fili makes a good point so Bilbo nods his head and they leave the issue at that.

              “I didn’t know it was going to be that soon,” I whisper to her once everyone has gone back to their meal. “That’s really scary!” I whisper-yell to her and she rolls her eyes wide before focusing on her meal again. It’s not a long before everyone has finished with their meal and a small band begins to pick up the mood with their tunes.

               The time that I have been dreading for the entire night finally comes forward. Dancing. The noble ladies we’ve invited begin to swarm over our men like sharks that smell blood in the water.

              “My King,” Daria supplicates with her eyelashes batting like the hussy I know she’s trying to be, “I would be so humbly honored if I could have the chance to dance with you this evening. I hear that you are well versed in such arts.” _‘WHAT THE FUCK!’_ I scream internally at how obviously she’s trying to flatter him and it makes me mad. I’ve never known myself to be jealous but I want to rip this bimbo’s head off.

                I turn my head away from the dam to Lena mouthing my previous thought and leaving my mouth wide open in shock at the end while she makes the same face back. Unfortunately, I see Thranduil looking directly at me as well, so he sees the entire interaction, which he smirks at, causing me to blush bright red and shake my head.

              “Unfortunately Lady Daria, however flattered I am by your offer I will dance with no other than my betrothed this evening. However, my nephew prince Kili would be equally flattered by your offer,” he finishes with a slight nod in respect. Luckily for my ego, and Daria’s nose alignment, she retreats with a small ego hit of her own. I stifle the Cheshire grin and cackle with a well placed cough into my sleeve as Kili’s face suddenly goes pale and his mouth hangs open in shock.

                I bat my fingers at him, teasing him to take the dams hand when he looks like he’s about to be forced to kiss an orc. “Who knew that you were so jealous lady Clara,” Thranduil murmurs from beside me and I smirk even wider.

               “I'm not usually jealous but he,” I point over to Thorin who is schmoozing away with council members and their families while also fending off other women, “is going to be my husband and I’m not about to share him with anyone.” I smile to myself at the normalcy of the words, the familiarity that I’m already enjoying. I look to Thranduil and I’m floored that I see a full smile adorning his face as well, or well as much of a smile as he can manage.

               “Everyone else is fair game to mingle with but he’s mine.” I chuckle again. “Who knew that you could have fun,” I tease and nudge his shoulder with my elbow. His shocked expression tells me that I must be one of the few to do that and live to tell the tale, or at get to keep my hand. “So touchy,” I hum with a smirk and continue sipping my ale while we go back to our own bubbles of space.

                The night goes on with dancing and merriment, all while Fili and Kili are pelted by offers of dancing and merriment of their own. Kili has to accept since he’s not officially courting anyone but Fili and Thorin refuse nearly every offer that comes their way. Bilbo’s having his own fun munching away happily at the food before him while the other men engage in drinking contests and the longer the night goes on, the rowdier it becomes. It’s perfect and rowdy and unbelievable still that’s we’re really here. I’m going to be married and I’m going to have my best friend as family.

               “Do you wanna get outta of here?” Lena whispers as we watch yet another drinking game between Dwalin, Fili, and Kili where they’re all going to wake up tomorrow with little to no memory of tonight.

                I mull it over before nodding. “You grab some desserts, I’ll grab some wine and I’ll meet you in my room?” I suggest quietly. Lena bites her lips for a second before nodding so I head to the table making small talk as I go with a, “What do we have here? Is it any good? Great.” before just grabbing a bottle and glasses and leaving out the side door.

               The front chamber is lit with the large fire and some candles but the best sight of the night is Lena. I must have taken too long because she’s sitting there with the top half of her dress off and a tunic over that. I bark out a laugh as I put down the wine and glasses still laughing at such a disheveled sight.

               “I guess I’ll change too,” I mutter as I bend my arms back to unlace the corset and shimmy out, putting on my pajamas instead of the fancy get up. “So did you have as much fun as you thought you would?” I laugh as she groans.

               “I don’t think being wet with nervous sweats counts as fun,” she grimaces slightly and glances at her dress on the floor.

               “Well,” I garble, mouth full of pastry, “at least we didn’t trip.” A beat of silence comes over us until I giggle then Lena lets loose a giggle. There’s no stopping it as we cackle and laugh until our stomachs hurt and tears are streaming down our face, each of us laughing at how red the other’s face is.

               “How did we get here? This is literally one of the coolest places in Middle Earth. We’re in Middle Earth!” She tilts her head back happily and shoots her hands up in excitement. “We did it. We really did it.”

                “I’ll never get used to this,” I sigh as I take a sip and a bit and just look around at where we are. We’re literally in a royal suite. “We’re going to be royalty,” I tell myself with my brows raised in surprise. "Who ever thought this would be a good idea?" I cackle again.

               “We’re going to be kickass royalty. We’re literally at the top.”

               “We fuckin’ did it.”

               I raise my glass in silent cheers and with one more sip, I sit back and bask in the thought that we've done it. We've made it to our stable lives. “We sure did.”


	11. Problem Shooting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena is finding out that she may have some issues, although better hidden, like Clara with PTSD, and that there are also many differences in the justice department of Erebor. Mainly the part where there is only one judge; Thorin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Welcome back to everyone after waiting for like a month for the next chapter. I feel like the more I try to write, the more I get stumped. Oh well! Well here's the next chapter for you all and I hope you enjoy it. If you ever have any ideas please feel free to shoot them over or even if they're just some positive words that is always appreciated!  
> Thanks again!
> 
> Translation of Khuzdul:  
> Âzyungel: love of loves  
> Ghivâshelûh: my treasure of all treasures  
> Kurdel: heart of all hearts

**Chapter 11**

Lena POV

            The morning after the party is vaguely reminiscent of the drinking test in Mirkwood with the gross after taste of the wine, the pounding headache winding around my head and down my neck, and how my stomach turns at the thought of eating anything.

            I crane my head to the side, noticing that I’m not in my room but I’m actually in the front room of Thorin and Clara’s room on their longer couch and also notice the heavy blanket on my shoulders.

            “What-?”

            “Good morning!” Clara chirps. She’s coming in with a bowl of porridge most likely with cream and honey. My stomach revolts at the thought nearly causing me to gag as my stomach acid begins to climb up my throat. “I have some breakfast for you. You were out cold when I got up, got dressed, and then grabbed breakfast, so I got some for you too. I don’t know if you want oatmeal,” she trails off gently as she takes in my face. I must look green because my stomach feels beyond horrible.

            “Here!” She drops the oatmeal on the tables as I lunge toward the bucket she’s pointing at next to the couch and I barely make it as I vomit what little is left in my stomach. “Take a deep breath, you’re alright,” she murmurs.

            I wipe the bitter bile from the edge of my mouth with the corner of my shirt sleeve and give a small groan. “Do you have any water?”

            “Yep!” And a few seconds later glass is being pushed into my hand. It’s cool and fresh against my dry lips, probably from mouth breathing all night, and even better against my dry throat as I gulp it down. The door to the bedroom opens as Thorin walks to kiss Clara on the cheek when I feel my heart flinch because I want Fili to kiss me right now and be the one to hold my hair back.

            “Too much to drink last night, eh?” he chuckles at my most likely green face and my stomach wobbles with me when I think of replying, so I answer with a groan and look back down at the bucket as I wretch up more bile and Clara rubs my back. "The children of men have such soft constitutions when it comes to drinking," he scoffs once again. This time though I shoot him a glare that he smirks at.  _'Cheeky bastard.'_

            I force down another retch as my stomach protests at its fullness. “I don’t mind if you stay here but if you want to go back to your room Fili might be back by now,” she supplies and I give another pitiful groan before sipping the cool water.

            “I’m gonna go,” I grumble as I fix my crooked shirt and wipe my mouth again before leaving the warm room and leaving Clara and Thorin to cuddle or kiss or whatever they do in the morning.

            My room looks as if no one has come in all night. Not even Fili’s side of the bed is trussed up. _‘Weird’_ I think as I take in the near pristine bed. Another wave of nausea hits me like a ton of bricks making me run to the bathroom as quickly as possible, nearly doing a rockstar knee slide to the toilet before my stomach squeezes the little bit of water out and restarting my dehydration all over again.

            Cue nearly ten minutes of sitting alone breathing heavily before I hear the one voice that makes it all better. “Lena?” _‘Finally!”_

“Her- Huuuuu!”  I answer with another round of painfully contracting stomach muscles and more bile into the bowl.

            “Lena? Are you alright lov- oh!” he exclaims as he sees me hunched over the toilet but he’s muffled in my ears as the blood rushes faster through them. “You and Clara had quite the night then?”

            I nod my head with another groan. It was a long night after the second glass of elven wine. “Drank a bit, ate a bit, can’t really remember more.” I take a deep breath of cool air with my face not in the toilet anymore.

            “Here then, let me get you a bit of the tonic Oin gave me for this reason,” he smirks, or at least what I can hear from his tone. _‘God anything to keep me from being this sick all day!’_ I mentally cry. I sit back against the cool stone with my eyes closed as Fili’s steps grow quiet before returning and putting something in my resting hand. “Remind me to keep you away from the spirits from now on,” he chuckles brightly. I crack an eye open at his cheery attitude and he laughs again at my expression.

            “Take little sips. It tastes foul but it works wonders the morning after drinking,” he instructs with a nod and as I pour it into my mouth I understand what he means. It’s thick and tastes sour in like instead of drinking tea with water you dump the bag of herbs right into your mouth. Fili’s body warmth feels good as he sits next to me, thigh to thigh and shoulder to shoulder.

            “I think the whole mountain is moving slowly after last night. I know Kili certainly is,” he chuckles. I feel my stomach turn again but the urge to throw up seems harder all of the sudden as if Oin’s cocktail is fighting the nausea and actually winning. “Keep sipping,” he guides my hand back to my mouth seeing as it’s become frozen as he's talking. “Kili and I got a bit out of hand with the drinking games. We did win against the nobles though and then we moved down to some of the taverns in the lower levels.”

            I faintly chuckle as I imagine lord Harvi trying to out drink those two, and I can imagine he’s doing as well as I am right now. “Wow,” I grimace as I take another sip and feel it go down my throat in thick rivulets, “I actually feel better. I definitely don’t feel as horrible.”

            His smirk makes me smirk back as I realize how little faith I had in this sort of herbalist healing. “Try to drink some water first then move on to food,” he suggests after a bit longer sitting on the cold tile sipping the spring water from the mountain. The tile goes from warm to cool after a little while and I decide that it’s time to get up and maybe shower off this vomit smell. I finish the goop and clear my mouth with a few breaths.

            “Do you have meetings to get to today?” I wonder as I tilt my head back against the hard green stone.

            “Hm no. Meetings are delayed from the party so I get more time with you,” he smiles. He leans in for a kiss and I quickly cover my mouth with my hand.

            “NO! I just threw up a bunch of times so no kisses until I clean my mouth out!” I tell him sternly with a mock glare.

            There’s a well placed and well meaning nudge against my shoulder. “You with your rules and propriety.” He shakes his head with another smile and gets up to leave the bathroom to let me shower in peace. The warm water is nice against my clammy skin and my stomach is definitely more settled than before. Now with my skin feeling less waxy, my hair smelling like almonds and lavender, and my mouth is scrubbed of vomit I let Fili kiss me gently.

            “Now this is the best part of my morning,” I whisper against his lips before going in for another sweet kiss. His mustache vibrates against my skin as he hums his agreement.

            “This is my favorite of the morning as well.” His hands untuck my tunic and his fingers brush my sides. It raises goosebumps on my torso and down my arms.

            “Hm, don’t tease.” His eyes flash with a dark gleam at my words so he makes his touches harder, his grip tighter, and the insistence of his lips greater until I break away gasping for breath. “All play and no work doesn’t make for a very good Prince of Erebor,” I give him a dramatic frown and he smiles.

            “Then let us find my trouble making brother and we will be off to our meetings and assignments for the day.” _‘Wait what? Our meetings? Kili included?’_ I wonder with a bit of a frown.

            “Aren’t they usually only for us? I’ve never had an assignment with the both of you before. Why would they need all three of us for something?” I think aloud. Fili shrugs at my questions and gives me his best, and cutest, confused face.

            “Uncle said something about going down to the markets and seeing how everything is doing. Usually, there are a few hundred vendors so I wouldn’t be too surprised to need the three of us to assist. I believe Clara is even coming along,” he trails off in thought. “I do have a question for you that I am too, uh, hesitant to ask her. . .” he looks at me sheepishly.

            “Alright then,” I drawl out, mimicking his confused and hesitant expression. They’re not very shy about asking anything so this must be quite the question for Fili to not want to ask Clara himself.

            “Well, um, if Thorin is my uncle,” I nod my head in a ’duh’ manner as if to say ‘keep going’, “then with him marrying Clara should I, um, uh, call her auntie?” he finishes all small like. The question makes me recoil internally for a moment because it sounds so wrong. All of their ages are so messed up with ours but logically it makes sense that if Thorin is the uncle then Clara would be the marrying aunt.

            “Oh,” I respond dumbly. “I’ve never really thought about that, but I wouldn’t call her that because she might get mad at you.”

            “Why is that? She would be our aunt wouldn’t she not?”

            I roll my eyes and nod my head, “Yeah you’re right but you’re also physically old enough to be my grandfather or even great grandfather so I’m not sure how she would like it. Women usually don’t like being told that we’re old,” I trail off with my face scrunched. He finally relaxes with an answer and we continue our way down to what looks like another training ground.

            I must make some sort of face because he pauses long enough to tell me, “Kee went down for a bit of training beforehand.” My stomach feels in knots a little staring at the wide double doors and knowing that there’s a training room right behind there. _‘I should be fine’_ I tell myself. I clench and unclench my fingers to try and relieve the tension but it’s sitting higher in my chest at this point.

            Fili walks in first but as he moves all I can see are rows upon rows of targets on stands and nailed into boards with some in bales of hay and my stomach drops. _‘It’s an archery field.’_ The only way to describe how I feel is shock mixed with horror and awe. For a room so beautiful with sandy floors, more green walls, and incredibly tall ceilings I almost can’t imagine warriors in here.

            As I do another quick scan I see Fili has already found Kili so I take a cautious second look around. I only make it twenty feet past the door before I hear a shout and then there’s that sound I only hear in my nightmares. The whooshing sound that’s barely a gust of air moving past you and it spans less than a blink.

            I barely have time figure out what’s going on as I see the arrow coming toward me. I let out a shrill scream less than a second later. _‘Not again. Not again. Not again. Not again’_ I repeat over and over in my head with this paralyzing fear firing through my veins. It’s cold. Freezing, actually. As I turn towards the shout, the arrow comes sweeping over my right shoulder and lands behind me. My heart is racing and all I can think about is the battle and the way that arrow would have felt stuck in me.

             My knees slam to the ground so hard I worry for a split second if they will crack as I subconsciously make myself a smaller target. I cover my mouth with both of my hands as it rests open from the scream, gaping like a fish out of water from the panic.

            “LENA!” Fili’s low tone is higher as he cries out and I know it must be from Fili and Kili but feeling like I can't breath is pulling my attention away from the others. My chest is being constricted my something, it must be, because I can’t breathe in no matter how hard I try.

            “I can’t brea-!” I gasp. I can hardly feel the dirt under my fingers as I rest on all fours. I try to inhale only to have my chest hitch painfully on the in, and then immediately force whatever is in my lungs out. It's a horrible cycle that sends me back to square one; out of breath and in panic of a rain of arrows coming toward me.

             I risk a glance up only to find the rest of the world in slow motion. Fili is running toward me, Kili right behind him, and then right behind both of them is the dwarf who shot the arrow still holding the bow with an expression mimicking my own.

            Everything is becoming muffled as I’m not breathing enough but I can still understand that people are alarmed at the possibility of what could have happened. The bloody and horrific 'what if'. Fili’s arms snap around me like a bear trap, sending me reeling back into reality where I’m gasping tens of breaths and yet failing each time. _‘Can’t breathe!'_ I panic more as all I can focus on is a mix of the 'what if' of getting shot in the head and this loop of panic I'm stuck in.. Tears spring to my eyes and I cough as my lungs feel shriveled in my chest but the pain makes them feel like they’re about to explode.

            “-ena?” Fili calls to me what must be more than once but it gets more distorted with every second that passes. “I’ve got you love. It’s alright, you’re alright. Come on Lena, calm down. Deep breath for me, hm?” he tries coaxing me and I want to tell him that I’m trying, I really do but it feels more and more impossible as the buzzing turns into ringing and black spots dance in front of my eyes.

             Past his shoulder, I see Kili is distraught and the dwarf in the back being forced down to his knees by guards. _'Or are the other soldiers?'_ I wonder faintly. When I close my eyes I see the snowy cliffs and rolling grey sky even though I feel Fili’s arms around me and feel his clothes brushing against my skin. _'Am I dying again?'_ I wonder briefly as it brings back that dark and painful memory. I clench my eyes together as I try to take one more pinching breath in, only succeeding in finally falling into darkness.

            “You could have killed her!” Is the first thing I hear above the buzz in my head. The second thing I notice is that I can feel my fingertips again and my breathing is normal. Actually, I just feel horribly tired and notice there is something under my head. _‘A jacket?’_ I wonder before turning my head toward the noise.

            “Please, forgive me I-,” the dwarf tries to reason but Fili isn’t having it.

            “Take him away!” he roars, causing me to cringe at the volume. I try to take deeper breaths but cringe as I feel my sore diaphragm muscles expand and push down, giving me a slight pinching sensation spasming on the inhale.

             Seeing the tall ceilings when I open my eyes gives me a nasty and spinning sense of déjà vu from waking up on the stone slab. “huuugh” I groan as my head throbs slightly but I only hear him hush me before grabbing my hand and coming into focus.

            “Lena?” he sighs as I hear more dirt and clothes shuffling around me, then his hands are on me, resting on me and cupping my face.

            Instead of wallowing in how crappy I feel right now, I focus on how his mustache beads dangle and swing as he leans over me and how his brow pinches in the center as he worries. His hand slips under my neck and the other one comes to cradle my head as he gently begins to sit me up.

           “Here you go, sit up slowly love, that’s it,” he praises as he guides me while my head still spins slightly. “Take some deep breaths for me. There you go.” He smiles sweetly but his eyes say worried instead of happy. "You gave us all quite a fright there,” he chuckles nervously. The hand on the back of my head stays there while the other moves to hold my shoulder steady.

            I widen my eyes. _‘I gave THEM a fright?’_ “I frightened you? Are you kidding me? Did you not see the giant arrow that could have stuck itself in my head?” I ask him seriously and his smile falls immediately. This is in no way funny! My extremities are still tingling with the new flow of oxygen back into them and I feel a twinge of embarrassment at passing out in front of all of these dwarves but I’m flooded with the worry that I almost died. Again.

            I pause for a moment, look at the ground and then look into his eyes. “I almost died. Again.” My voice raises at the end and I can see the worry start to come back into Fili’s eyes and the anxiety begins to rise again. “Fili, I-!” I begin to shout but he moves closer and shushes me quietly. “I can’t- I don’t- I- What!”

            I look back and see the long and ornately carved arrow stuck into the wood beam that could have been my head. “Oh my god!” I grasp at his hands, his wrists, anything as I begin to get worked up again, the panic not knowing where to go. "OH MY GOD!"

            His hand cupping my face pulls me back to reality little by little. “Lena! Stop! Be still! It was a fright and it’s over now. There’s no need to worry because it was an accident and you’re unharmed!” I take one deep calming breath and then another as the tingling feeling begins to dissipate for the second time. “He is going into the holding of the guards until he can be punished for what he’s done.”

            _'Punished?'_  “Wait what? He isn’t going to prison is he?” I mean I know I should be angry and upset, and I am, but he shouldn’t be punished horribly for what was an accident. Fili looks shocked.

            “Lena, he has to be punished at least to some extent for what he did. He could have killed you! You're considered a member of the royal family. If someone injures you then their life could subsequently be used as forfeit.” He lets that sink in and I don’t know what to say so I say nothing. “Here, let’s stand up and get you water before we move on with our day, alright?” I nod, still a bit numb knowing that someone could be executed and people here have no real qualms about it.

            We don’t talk about it for the rest of the morning. Kili tries to make small talk but I’m too zoned out thinking that if that arrow had hit me then we’d be in a worse and bloodier situation right now with my brain oozing out of my head- _'Stop!'_ I force myself to focus on something else like the feeling of my rough belt against my fingers. Fili is trying to keep the morning as casual as he can but the forced calm is making me edgier.

            I spot Clara talking to a little dwarf and his mother before she turns to me with a smile on her face. “Good afternoon Lady Lena!” she calls dramatically from the opposite side of the market and I wish I could disappear into the ground when everyone looks at me. I send her a glare and she recoils for a second. _‘Does she even know?’_ I wonder as she approaches me cautiously. “What’s up your ass this morning? Did you continue to puke for the rest of it?”

            “Keep your voice down and stop being sassy!” I hiss and look around. I’m pretty sure that everyone knows about the archery range and that’s why they’re acting so shy. We don’t need more gossip surrounding us. “Um, so I almost got shot again today,” I mutter as I scan the goods at a stand and then smile at the woman behind the counter, a greying dwarrowdam with an elegantly styled beard that grows from in front of her ears.

            “Oh my god! Was it like you actually almost got shot? Or was it-?” I feel like I'm losing my patience with her as I just want her to know what's going on. I know it's unfair but I just want her to somehow KNOW what's happened and be there for me.

            A hard glare is sent her way before I shake my head angrily. “Yes, Clara, I literally almost got shot in the head with a giant arrow with a big metal barbed tip!” I hiss.

            She bristles back at my tone. “Oh, okay! I can’t read your mind and I didn’t know about this until now! I'm really sorry that you had to go through that again. That must have been really tough for you,” she sympathizes as she calms down with me.

           I nod. “Yeah, it was. I- uh- and then I fainted in front of the soldiers that were training and Fili and Kili,” I add reluctantly which only makes her jaw drop further.

            “Well shit,” she drawls. “Was it some sort of PTSD flash back or was it just the shock of it?”

            “The first one- um, both I guess,” I mutter. I’ve never had a problem with this before but now all I can think about is the way the arrow glided right past my head, close enough for me to lick it. “Once it started," I allude to my panic debacle, "I felt like I couldn't get a hold of it even with Fili there. It wasn't like you said yours was with the training field. Fili said that the guy would be punished for being careless but I don’t want him to be in trouble!” I look around as my voice gets higher at the end until I remember where I am.

            “Maybe,” she stresses quickly as she holds my hand in hers, “Maybe you can talk to Thorin about it when we get back. He said something about getting ready for dinner, but mainly he’s going to be doing paperwork today. I’m going to be there later if you want to come then. It’ll be in about an hour or two. I don’t think it’ll be that bad.” She moves on to look at the gold trinkets but turns around suddenly. “But I won’t be there to help you with your point, I’ll only be there in moral support as I do my own paperwork.”

            _‘That’s not as much as I thought she would do.’_ My thought must show on my face because she gives a shrug and continues greeting people and looking at their wares. I learn more names and faces than I can count and once everyone sees I’m not about to have them arrested for looking at me, it’s a very pleasant, albeit tiring, afternoon.

            A few hours later the time has come to talk to Thorin, but I haven’t had another chance to run it by Clara or Fili even though I know he would only tell me that it’s the law and I should want him to be punished. I don’t. Harfur stands next to me now that the idea of me being a danger magnet is refreshed in everyone’s minds.

            “I’m sorry I don’t know how long this is going to take,” I mutter as I shuffle my feet outside of Thorin’s door.

            “Take your time lass, I’ll still be here for you when you wish to leave,” he responds dutifully. I nod and gingerly knock on the door. There is no answer until I hear a faint ‘enter’ through the thick wood.

             My heart is threatening to beat out of my chest and my stomach feels like there are a thousand butterflies stuck in there. Clara has her back to me and Thorin hunched over another desk that looks piled with paperwork.

            “Lena? What brings you here?” I snap my head to look at him but stop as a laugh nearly burst out of my throat. He’s wearing glasses! Thorin is wearing these little half-moon wire glasses that sit on the bridge of his nose and remind me of old lady reading spectacles. I look between the back of Clara’s head and Thorin until I suck up enough courage to just tell him. “Lena?” he asks again as he loses patience quickly.

            I jump right to it. “Oh right, sorry! Um, I came to talk about the accident at the training fields.” He nods his head thoughtfully.

            “I would not worry about that. He will be dealt with accordingly and will be punished for being careless.”

            I shuffle on my feet nervously because even with old lady glasses he’s still pretty damn intimidating. “Well, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I know that he didn’t mean to, uh, well-,”

            “Kill you?” he finishes and I get that icy feeling in my stomach again. I go to open my mouth but he holds up a large hand to stop me. “Let me guess if I can understand your hesitations.” I nod again. “You are uncomfortable with him being punished even though he nearly killed you due to his carelessness?”

            “I’m wondering if it’s really necessary?” I wonder with a pained face. It feels like I’m talking to a king but I want to talk to a friend instead. He motions to the chair nearest to us so I try to calm down enough to sit and relax and not be nervous.

            “Did Fili already explain why punishment would be necessary?” I nod and look at my hands. “You are a part of the royal family and because of that even an accident can not go unanswered.” I nod again. The silence between us is thick and uncomfortable. My mouth feels like it’s stuffed with cotton and the only sound is the scratch Clara writing on parchment and the crackle of the fire.

            “In-i-in our world the only form of punishment is time in prison or nothing. I feel like the word ‘punishment’ is thrown around but I don’t know what that means or what that entails.” His eyebrows push together as he thinks about what I said and he nods thoughtfully.

            “He will receive ten lashes by his commanding officer and that will be the end of it. A lesson will be learned and he hopefully will be more careful to avoid future punishment.”

            “But couldn’t-,” I start but Thorin gives me a glare that says it’s non-negociable. “Clara, don’t you-?”

            “Nope.” She doesn’t even turn from her desk. “Remember I’m not here.” Thorin tilts his head questioningly like he knows he’s out of the loop. “Oh,” she does turn around with confusion on her face, “Is the ten arbitrary or is there reason behind the number?”

            My stomach turns at the thought of being whipped again, remembering goblin town, and if I concentrate enough I can nearly feel the claws scratching my neck and ripping my clothes.

            “The number of strokes was chosen so that he remembers his lesson,” he says cryptically. _‘Doesn’t make me feel better at all’_ I shiver slightly.

            “So, there’s no way to avoid getting punished just because he had poor aim?” I double-check with him and he nods his head.

            “If he has poor aim in battle then he will not survive. In the future, he may be thankful for the lesson when it saves his life.” _‘So tough love.’_ “Would you not want some kind of repentance if it had been Fili?” he asks suddenly and almost think I can get it. It can’t just be an accident. It must be addressed.

             “Um, I mean I guess I would have. I think I understand now.” I nod once again and they let the conversation lapse into silence. “I’ll let you get back to your paperwork then. Clara, Thorin,” I bid them goodbye quietly before leaving the silent room. Even after Fili and Thorin explaining it to me, I still feel something tugging inside me telling me it shouldn’t be normal and that I shouldn’t get used to it. My walk around to the library with Harfur is quiet but I know he can feel me worry next to him.

            “Are you alright lass?”

            “Yeah I’m alright but I just don’t feel as comfortable with the punishments- I mean it’s different from where I come from that’s all. It’s just different and it’s weird adjusting to it.”

            “I understand your hesitation. We have our laws and they are the way they are for a reason. Our laws are absolute for a reason Lena. That lad will think better of it when his aim improves,” he scoffs and I tilt my head because that’s the second or third time I’ve heard that today.

            “You say that as if you know.”

            He looks surprised. “I do know. I was punished for nearly the same thing in my training, but I received forty lashes because I did hit ‘em, granted it was in the leg,” he shrugs, “But I was better for it and I know he will be too.” Now that makes me feel a little better.

            “I guess then. I feel like it was my fault though. What if I-,” I try to give myself some excuse but Harfur laughs. He actually laughs at me! “What?” I’m annoyed and kind of over all of this ‘you don’t know anything’ attitude from everyone.

            “Lass, Lena, everyone is trying to tell you that you did nothing wrong.” I’m surprised at how soft his voice is and how differently he looks at me. “You were not in the way in the shooting range and you were the one who was almost shot. Nothing was your fault. Understand that.”

            “I’ll try to.” We enter the library after a long day but I try to look forward to this part. I had pitched the printing press to Balin a few weeks ago but now I want to put that plan into action. I think I’m ready to do MY first big project. Erebor, and Middle Earth’s shoots into the future.

            “Good afternoon everyone,” I greet some of the main scribes as well as Balin who is the main scribe. “The reason I’ve gathered you all here is to begin an idea that may take time to both build and execute properly. It would help the production of literature because the scribes wouldn’t have to hand write their books.” Looks of shock pass around the table.

            “We would be unnecessary? You would take away our work?” one greying dwarf asks and internally I heave a sigh. _‘Isn’t that what everyone argues’_ I drone on in my head.

            “No, it would not be taking away your work. If anything, this would be on a trial basis once it’s built and if it is successful and enough people like it then it would be used more regularly. If a scribe still wanted to hand-copy books, then they would be more than welcome to! I want to be very clear in saying this is a choice, not a requirement.” A lot of shoulders drop after that most likely in relief. I’m sure things here haven’t changed in centuries and when they do it’s next to nothing.

            “I believe that this will be most welcomed for some of the new scribes as well as some of the older folks. There are certainly many tattered books that need to copying,” Balin adds from his chair and, like a flock of teenage girls, the rest of the table nods in agreement at the head cheerleaders opinion.

            “You have our support, my lady,” a plump old dwarf with a beard from his pudgy cheeks down to his belly chimes in. Relief blooms in my chest at finally doing something right here, and finally getting to do something of my own.

            “You have ours as well,” one of the carpenters adds and I can’t help but let the smile grow on my face as the different disciplines of labor throw out their own positive wishes.

            Balin stands from the table, gathering the papers in his hands and nodding his head once. “Well then, if we are all in agreement, we may begin creating.” _‘Oh shit.’_ I have no idea how to design a printing press. I barely even know the first step.

            The most I know is the basics taught in back at old-timey field trips we used to take and what little I remember about the Gutenburg Bible from world history. _‘Shit.’_

            “Balin, may I speak to you for a minute?” I ask politely, almost too politely to catch his attention, and judging by the look in his eyes it does. The second I think we’re nearly out of hearing range I whisper, “I have no idea how to build this.” That sure catches his attention.

            “Well, what do you mean by that?”

            “What I mean is that I have no idea how it’s really supposed to work and how the internal and even external parts work.” His eyes widen.

            “Then I would suppose today is not the day to begin creating?” he snarks even though it still sounds civil and polite. _‘Only as Balin can do’_ I remind myself with a small sigh.

            “No, it really wouldn’t be.”

            He sighs heavily before his expression switches suddenly and he turns to the advisors. “Alright then. Unfortunately, lady Lena is being pulled away to other projects this evening so we must begin this design another time,” he smoothly lies. The head builders look disappointed, but I think they would be more disappointed if I wasted their time with not knowing what to do. I don’t have anything to do tonight besides bone with Fili and cry about earlier (not in any particular order).

            “Thank you,” I mouth to Balin before I lightly bow and excuse myself to my room to get ready for dinner. The bed is made. “Ugh!” I groan. I know that having a maid is something I’m going to have to get used to but for right now I just want the bed to be messy and remind me that people actually sleep in it instead of it looking like something from a sears catalog.

            I get as far as taking off my shirt before I feel my arms turn to jelly and my eyes begin to close from being exhausted the majority of the day and from getting a crappy night of drunk sleep. _‘I can spare a minute or two’_ I tell myself as I flop on the bed wearing only my high waisted pants and my unlaced boots still hanging on my feet. _‘Just one minute’_ I think distantly.

            “-ena? Lena? Wake up love,” Fili shakes my shoulders and the room has gone from light to dark.

            “What time is it?” I gasp sharply as I sit upright in bed and look around the room.

            “Well, you missed dinner. I saw you sleeping and I didn’t want to disturb you, but I saved you some.” He points to a platter on the table with a pitcher of water next to it and hands me the wrinkled tunic I had taken off earlier.  “Is everything alright Lena? Are you doing alright from this morning?”

            “No. That was something that I never wanted to go through and I didn’t want to get anyone punished, and yes I know,” I cut him off as he opens his mouth to argue, “it had to be done and he’s going to be better for it and whatnot. Fili, that arrow was so close I could lick it. I nearly felt it brush my face and I could sure as hell remember what it felt like to have it stick in me. I’m really not okay with that.”

            His brow pinches before he nods solemnly. “While I can’t promise that nothing will ever happen to you and that you will never be in harm's way, I promise to always try and keep you safe. Wou-,” he stops and thinks for a moment. “Would you like to learn to fight? You’re worried about being helpless when we have some of the finest warriors in Middle Earth.” My stomach does backflips at the thought of fighting any of them.

            “Um, well, I think it would be an interesting idea but I would be a shitty student and I can barely look at a sword let alone lift one.” I think he can sense my reluctance because he nods and backs off of the idea and allows me to eat while he talks about the rest of his day only to stop and give me a look that says he knows I haven’t been listening for a few minutes.

            “What?” I ask and his lips curl into a smirk. “What?” I whine again and his smirk turns into a full smile.

            “You haven’t been listening, have you?” he chuckles and I blush brightly, realizing that I’ve been zoned out the entire time. “Where is your head at pretty woman?” he nuzzles into my neck and I bat him away with a smirk.

            “It’s with the idea of both of us cuddling in that bed after a long day and hopefully not another one for a while,” I whisper silently and a bit brokenly, then I get this feeling, this wave, no a tsunami, of sadness all of the sudden. Looking at him so loving and kind and right there just is overwhelming but all I can remember right now is the panic on his face as he ran toward me earlier. My lower lip trembles uncontrollably so I swallow hard and look up to avoid tears coming over my eyes.

           "Lena?" Out of the corner of my eye I see him slide off of his chair and walk up to me. “Lena, Lena, Lena,” Fili repeats softly with a bear hug and my head tucked under his chin. The smell of pipeweed and vetiver is all consuming when I'm surrounded by him like this. “I hope so as well. Now come to bed love,” he squeezes my shoulders and pulls back to take my hands in his, dragging me to the soft but pristine bed lined with furs and silks.

            “Come and lay with me right here!” He tugs me to him sharply on the last word, sending me flying onto him with a surprised shriek with my hands on his pecs and my legs straddling his hips. “Kurdel,” he stretches up and kisses my lips softly. “Âzyungel.” With his large and warm hand on my hip he flips us so that my hands rest next to my head and his hair curtains us in soft light. “Ghivâshelûh,” he sighs reverently with a final soft kiss to my lips.

            We meet in the middle as I arch desperately to feel connected to him and share the same air, the same space, and the same heartbeat as him. The kiss is as soft as always but unhurried unlike some of our other kisses. Our own private moment in time. I love the bubble effect that the quiet produces around us. There is no hustle and bustle of the city and there's no other chatter that takes away from us being together.

            Before I know it, I begin to feel impatient with his body so close to mine that I yank his torso down onto mine so I can feel his weight and his muscles flexing under his tunic.

           “Fili.” It’s only his name that I sigh but his kisses respond by building in their heat and intensity until they’re sweltering and the silence is replaced by the rustle of cloth, heavy breathing, and the occasional moan from either of us.

            Hands grapple with tough fabric, the bed frame under us creaks and groans with the pressure while my heart is pounding out of my chest so hard I can feel it in every crack and crevice on my body. Fili’s eyes gradually become engulfed until there is only a thin ring of blue along the edges.

            We don’t need to speak because we know this is going to be fast and hard and combustive; a culmination of the stress and nerves from the whole day rolled into one fucking.

           “Get on your knees,” he demands harshly as he’s already turning my back to him and I’m all too happy to let him. It’s all bruising grips along my waist and hips and sloppy kisses along my neck with his beard scraping and scratching against the back of it. I have to bend my head at an awkward angle to put my lips onto his as we rock back and forth until I can’t take it anymore and I’m overwhelmed enough to keep my head down as I white-knuckle the sheets until we both finish but never wanting it to end.

             Heavily panting with both of our grips still tight, we catch our breaths slowly but surely before falling onto each other in a sprawling tangle of limbs. “You are finer than the purest of mithril,” he whispers against my temple before planting another kiss.

             Silence comes over the two of us and the sudden urge to laugh bubbles up inside me. It sounds like I’ve gone crazy but the tension from the entire day is just gone. Just like that it’s totally gone.

            “You ever have that feeling that everything will be alright? Right now I feel like everything will work out.”

            “I feel like that after I'm done loving you, and I feel like that with you in my arms,” he flatters me. “Think about my offer for training and maybe we can talk about that later. Let’s end this day, and hopefully, tomorrow will give you a break from being attracted to danger,” he smiles like a dope as he looks at me. He looks at me like I’m the only one in the world and that’s the way I want it to be and stay.


	12. One After Another

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The wedding planning is beginning to go off the rails, causing Clara to go a little crazy. Lena feels a little crazy herself after planning the bachelorette party and then even worse after someone mentions family and home. The wedding is around the corner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Hobbit or any of its characters, only my own.
> 
> Well, it's certainly been a while since I've posted anything, but don't worry! I haven't forgotten anyone or the story! This chapter was a little challenging as I've hopped around half-finished chapters on my computers waiting for inspiration to strike me. As always, I hope you love the chapter!  
> Thanks again! <3

**Chapter 12**

Clara POV

            I’m going slowly crazy. I think I would rather be in court, no, I’d rather be in a sewing circle with Dís and the other ladies in waiting than sitting here listening to OTHER PEOPLE plan MY wedding. It’s all grand this and lavish that and, and, and! I am literally about to explode, and I don’t doubt Lena can feel it.

            It started out pretty normal as I constructed a list that Thorin and I both approve of but that’s the last normal event that has happened in nearly a month. Along with duties and paperwork that have to get done, I’ve been assigned the task of wedding planning too partly because I’m a control freak and because I’m told that’s what the “proper ladies do” or whatever that means.

            I’ve gotten a new stable hand, Corin, who listens well and has helped me immensely over the past few days. He doesn’t talk much but he reminds me of Wesley from the Princess Bride with the whole silence thing. He’s gone from the new guy to nearly my right-hand man (other than Varis of course) in a matter of weeks. Truth be told, we’ve hit it off very quickly but that doesn’t stop me from being consumed in everything wedding.

            After the first cake meeting, yes there have been more than one, where OTHER PEOPLE have been making choices before I can even open my mouth, so I brought Lena to see what I’ve been telling her about. She didn’t believe me when I told her the dwarves were starting to act coo coo and said something along the lines of “You have to remember this is the first wedding in Erebor for like nearly seventy years.” While I gave her an incredulous look as if to say, ‘that makes it any better?’

            I think I could run out of here. _‘I’m pretty sure I’d be fast enough that no one would be able to stop me at this poi-‘_ my thoughts get cut off by a nudge from the blonde and I resist the urge to roll my eyes and groan.

            “Once we reach the seventh layer-,” the chef continues like a steamroller until I raise my hand and Lena coughs, drawing his attention to the both of us.

            “Why is it being made so large again?” I ask with a pinched brow. The cake maker tilts his head causing his beard to flop around along with it. “I mean what if not everyone like the cake? It is for everyone as well as for me,” I trail off, giving up, as he looks more aghast.

            “My lady this is the royal wedding and is deserving of a royal cake!” he emphasizes with a nod of his head and the straightening of his shoulders like I’m the one being stupid about this. _‘What the hell?’_ I think as I look toward Lena with a slightly gaping mouth, staying silent until the end.

            “This isn’t a royal wedding, it’s my wedding,” I whisper in Lena’s ear.

            “Well then tell them that,” she whispers back, and I can tell she’s irritated about this like I am. My stomach flips as I think about the conflict I might run into from that. _‘I don’t know what I’m going to do!’_

_THE NEXT DAY_

           “My lady we have a fabric sample for you to look at for your wedding and coronation gown.” _‘Oh my’_ I blanch as it’s shoved in my hands. This time I’m on my own. It’s surprisingly heavy for a four by four-inch of what looks like real gold and rich red jewel embroidered fabric nearly an inch thick and I just know they’re going to ask me to wear twelve petticoats under it.

           “How much of this will cover the dress?”

           “All of it.”

             My heart sinks for some reason and my palms get sweaty holding the swatch as I think of a full ball gown made of this. I don’t want this. ‘ _I really don’t want this_ ’ I think with rising anxiety towards the final product. I want the white dress and the simple little stuff that comes with a wedding, not this.

           “And the shape we are going to make is a style taken from the grea-,”

           “No.” It’s not loud but they all stop talking immediately. “I don’t want this. It’s not. . . me,” I speak softly, uncomfortable that they’re all looking at me again like I’m so bumbling idiot who doesn’t know how to do anything.

           “My lady, this is the attire for a royal wedding-,” the head seamstress begins with the same astonishment of the chef but I feel my courage rise a little.

           “It’s still my wedding. I’m not a nation or some head of state so I’ll marry king Thorin as myself.” The tailors and their army of apprentices pause in shock as they look at me. “I haven’t had a say in anything since this whole production started and that changes right now. Does everyone in this room understand?” I finish frustratedly, earning vigorous bobbing nods from everyone. “Good then. I would like my dress to be white.” I take another breath in to continue but notice a fairly afraid apprentice with her hand barely raised and nod my nod in her direction.

           “I don’t wish to sound rude my lady but isn’t white too plain for such an event?” she asks in a meek voice and I can see the rest of the tailors and seamstresses agree with her.

           “To make a counterpoint, Lady Galadriel, who’s one of the oldest and possibly most powerful beings in Middle Earth, wears white and the last thing I would call her is plain,” I point out to her even though I think none of them know who she is. “And it is also my wedding and choose to wear white, or I could just be naked,” I shrug dramatically. I nearly laugh at their panicked faces but keep mine straight as I continue, “I mean I’m sure that would turn a few heads but I thought if you wanted to show your skill this would be a good time-,”

           “Yes, my lady!” One of the younger dwarves shouts suddenly.

           “Of course we do my lady!” another cries from the back before getting a ‘tsk’ from the older ones.

           “Then we should get started,” I prompt with a final smirk. _‘Now for the other 99 aspects of this wedding I need to fix’_ I tell myself internally.

_LATER THAT NIGHT_

           “Did I hear that you, as you say ‘sassed’ the tailors earlier today?” Thorin mentions once we’re in bed and I freeze. Flipping around so that we’re nose to nose I smirk.

           “I absolutely did and it felt really damn good,” I confess to his surprise. “In my defense though they were nearly about to start on a dress that I didn’t agree to and it’s my dress, not theirs. So, I told them what I wanted and I even designed it myself! I think you’ll find it really pretty,” I nudge him with a wink. “It’s actually a design from my world so it’ll be different, but it’ll be beautiful.”

            “How do you deal with everyone justifying their own decisions in the name of ‘a royal wedding’ when I could run away with you right now and be perfectly happy?” I wonder out loud to the ceiling. It’s been on my mind ever since it popped up but It’s been a few days and it’s literally driving me crazy, but it only earns a smile from him.

            “I try not to let it get in my way,” he mumbles, and he smiles because he knows it’s a crappy answer that I won’t be very happy with, but as a matter of fact I’m very pleased.

            “So smart, so beautiful, and oh so surprisingly funny,” I chuckle dryly as I close my eyes and rest on my back. _‘This is going to be a long haul.’_

            “There’s the sass,” he mumbles again as he turns over to sleep. _‘Yeah, this is going to be a long few weeks.’_

_THE WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING_

**Third person POV**

           “So what do you want to do for the bachelorette party? I was thinking of keeping it a surprise for her, but I don’t know what people usually do for these things here, ya’ know?” Lena chit chats with Dís while they’re preparing for the next tea time for the ladies in waiting, adjusting the chairs and fluffing the pillows the way Dís shows her. Lena still doesn’t understand why they have to do this, this charade and sucking up to people who dislike them.

           “What is a ‘bachelorette’?” the older woman wonders, rolling the foreign word around in her mouth a few times as if she isn’t saying it correctly. Lena shoots her a strange look from the other end of the room.

            “Well, a bachelorette is a woman who isn’t married. It’s what we call someone who’s engaged to be married,” Lena explains, forgetting they don’t have French words here.

            “And what does one do during these parties?” the older woman continues to ask as she places and replaces puffed up embroidered pillows on the ornate couches.

            Lena internally panics because she can’t simply talk about crazy parties where the women go out drinking wildly, dancing over thickly muscled men, and dress promiscuously. “Well they um- uh-,” _‘shit’_ “the bride goes out with her bridesmaids, kind of like lady’s maids, and they all get drunk at bars and go dancing as a group.” Dís’s pace slows until it stops completely, leaving her watching Lena with a look of what Lena can only call disbelief.

            Her look makes Lena’s stomach drop until she hears her voice. “Why in Mahal’s name would these women go out like the men? Do they also go to the local brothels to sully their families names?” Her tone comes out so accusatory, cold, and judgmental it makes Lena angry. She knows that it’s a cultural difference but it’s also none of her fucking business to judge like this.

            “We don’t have any family left to have their names ‘sullied’ so it wouldn’t matter to us.” Both women stare at each other after that statement, Lena realizing what she just said out loud and Dís feeling dread drip over her at the other’s meaning. Dís looks down at the ground, ashamed at her words, but still adamant in her disdain toward the other’s traditions.

             “I- um- apologize for being so harsh.” She speaks softly, directly to Lena instead of shying away from the apology. “Is there really no one from your home you could invite? We are North enough to send an escort if it’s required,” The older woman double checks and the question brings stinging tears to Lena’s eyes. There are a lot of people she would invite if she had it her way. The one question she didn’t want to be asked, to either her (or Clara), was about home and here it is right in front of her.

             “We aren’t from here.”

             “Well, I know that dear,” Dís scoffs with a smirk. “You’re obviously so far north-,” she continues, oblivious to Lena’s glassy eyes.

             “No,” the blonde cuts in, “we aren’t from this world.” The statement hangs in the air heavily. “We aren’t from this north.” Lena can see in Dís’s eyes the moment she understands. They narrow, almost imperceptibly, around the edges and her mouth creates a hard line instead of their usual gentle part.

             “So are you a witch? A spellcaster then?” Her deep voice becomes sharper this time as she becomes on edge and it puts Lena on edge a bit as well.

              She shakes her head, knowing this is what was going to happen eventually, “No. We’re just normal in every way besides the fact that we’re from another world. We’re not really psychic like Kili told you. Gandalf made it all up so that we wouldn’t be left behind,” she laughs drily at the chaotic memory. “We nearly had to fight for a spot on an adventure that scared me to death and that I knew I was going to die on.”

              Dís nods her head in attentiveness. “And you said that you did? Die that is?” she wonders slowly, so Lena nods her head.

             “Yeah, I died. Clara too,” she adds as an afterthought.

              There’s a whoosh of fabric as Dís sits heavily on a nearby couch while she tries to process all of this new information. “I believed you were merely exaggerating that part.” _‘New worlds? Being brought back to life’_ she thinks silently. _‘Not possible’_.

            “So, to answer your question, we do have people we would invite, a lot of people actually,” she tells her sadly. “My parents and her parents, siblings, some friends, but we can’t because they are literally a world away and we can’t get to them. They might as well be dead,” she finishes quietly. One tear slips over her lash line but she quickly brushes it away with the back of her hand before a rough clearing of her throat. “Um, don’t ask Clara about family for the next few days. If it makes me cry then it’ll make her sob, trust me,” she assures while pursing her lips.

             Keeping Clara busy is working wonders on keeping her mind off of sentimental things like this. It sure is doing wonders for Lena, or at least was until just now.

            “Is there an idea you’d like to suggest instead? Something that women here do before they get married?” Dís thinks for a moment before nodding thoughtfully.

            “I sewed a quilt before my wedding day.” She smiles gently as she reminisces. “Having a quiet night may calm her mind before the big day. I know the ladies would enjoy tea and more sewing. You know that’s all they do,” she chuckles.

            Something about Dís being excited to look at dowries and sew some more together while the guys go drinking causes Lena to go silent and makes a face in disdain. **“** Lena, you’re a wonderful friend! That’s what we’ll do!” Lena opens her mouth only to get silenced by Dís’s excitement. _‘Clara is NOT going to be thrilled’_ she gripes in her head.

_THE NIGHT OF THE PARTY_

           “We’re going to be doing what all night?” The brunette blanches toward her friend. She’s really hoping she didn’t hear right.

           “Sewing, tea, babies,” Lena summarizes shortly. The ladies are expected to arrive any moment and those will certainly be the main focus of the conversation. How many babies will they have? Old wives tales and things like that, and possibly gossiping about something as scandalous as sex before marriage. _‘Give me a_ break’ Lena scoffs. Confusion suddenly sweeps over her as Clara turns on her heel, beginning to stride toward the door. “Where are you going!” she hisses and reels back when Clara turns face to face sharply.

            “To give myself a lobotomy!” the other hisses back just as sharply.

            No sooner does she say that the door springs open revealing an immaculately dressed Dís with servants carrying fine fabrics behind her and trays of sweets and tea.

            “Oh, this will be a truly fun evening! Nice and calm, just what you need hm dear?” she asks cheerfully with a light pat on the taller shoulder. Clara can barely hide the pained expression as she wishes she had gotten that lobotomy sooner, but she sticks with a half-hearted smile mistaken for nervousness. “Here is a robe for you to wear,” she offers what seems like out of the blue. “Lena informed me it’s something bachelorettes wear, do they not?” she asks, looking between the two quickly.

            “Great, thank you.” It doesn’t sound that genuine but Clara’s too busy pushing her nausea down along with her feelings of dread. Changing quickly she realizes the robe only goes down to her knees. _‘What the hell?’_ She gives Lena the same look who then raises her eyebrows.

            “Why is the robe so short?” Lena innocently asks for Clara, seeing that she’s becoming more and more edgy to the point her frustration is nearly tangible.

            There’s a shake of a head and a smile that tells Clara all she needs to know. The length was done on purpose and Dís knows this is not what Clara had in mind for the evening. It’s a way of keeping her in the room lest she show her “naked” legs to the mountain. _‘Bet.’_ Clara silently accepts the challenge thrown down by the other woman.

_LATER THAT EVENING_

             “Are you excited to become a mother lady Clara?” Clara chokes on her water, no wine for her or any of them for that matter, and looks up.

             “Why would I immediately become a mother?”

              The ladies in the room look taken aback at this response, not the usual one they’re expecting. “Because you’re going to be married and want to start a family as soon as possible, no?” There’s that tone. The chipper one that is all assuming and thought to be in good nature but is still pushing that answer as the only one. Even Lena feels her blood pressure rise at that question. _‘Some world views never change’_ she muses.

             “Let me be perfectly clear. When I’m married that will be enough of a family until I decide otherwise.” Clara’s tone brokers no negotiation as the other dam stutters, looking for something to say but Lena takes pity on her.

             “Maybe I’ll get you a dog. That’s an ideal family,” she cuts in quickly, shutting the other woman up.

             “Maybe a big guard dog with big teeth and big claws,” Clara muses and Lena nods.

             “At least large enough to tear someone in half,” she adds in mock seriousness. _‘This is not a great time’_ the blonde thinks as she continues sewing and takes a sip of her own water, wishing desperately that it was wine or even tequila because fuck it.

             About a half-hour later, the conversation slowly starts to rise from where the two humans dropped it. “So lady Clara,” Daria whispers conspiratorially as Clara fights tooth and nail not to roll her eyes from how much she hates this woman, “what are you most excited for after becoming married?” She begins to giggle after the word ‘excited’ which Clara can only assume she’s trying to edge at sex. _‘Alright, I’ll fuck with her’_ she mentally shrugs.

             “Oh, you mean about the se- consummation?” she catches herself, pretending to look down at her sewing with a bashful expression but catches the vigorous nod of Daria’s head. Clara could laugh at how easily the lady takes the bait. “Well- uh- I- um- I wouldn’t know anything about that,” she pretends to look even more self-conscious, fiddling with her hands and picking at the fabric in her lap. It’s too easy, that is, until there’s a laugh from next to Clara. Lena’s shoulders are shaking as she fails to contain her hysterical giggles before trying to straighten up, only failing once again.

              Daria’s scowl returns full force as she glares at the blonde. “What’s so funny?” Daria snaps and this time Clara does roll her eyes.

            “Her not knowing about sex,” Lena continues to chuckle, trying to sew her flowers straight on the hankie but having to stop again due to her giggles.

            “I doubt you would know,” Siga joins with a sneer before putting her fake demure mask on. Lena merely pauses in her sewing, looking up slightly with a satisfied grin stretching the corners of her mouth, going back to sewing calmly.

            “What?” Daria’s face falls as she realizes Clara no longer looks shy but smug and the rest of the eyes are on her, and she knows she’s been had.

             Clara leans in close enough that no one else but Lena will be able to hear what she says to Daria. _‘I’ve been waiting for this for a long time’_ she thinks with a sick glee. “My life with Thorin has never and will never be for your ears and your little pea brain to know,” she whispers, pulling back to see shock and anger cross over the dams face. _‘Good.’_ Clara doesn’t know how many minutes pass but she can’t stand it. She’s going to go ape shit on these women if she doesn’t get out of the fucking room.

             “I need a moment of air ladies, I’ll be right back,” Clara nods tightly after she takes another sip of water. “Please excuse me,” she bids as she leaves the stuffy room of women sitting in a circle just waiting for her roll over and be a good lady but that’s never going to happen. _‘Who do I need to talk to to get a drink around here’_ she mulls silently. _‘Thorin’s party’_ she realizes with a smirk.

              The silence that cuts through the air is thick enough to cut with a knife. “I’m gonna see what’s taking her so long. I’ll be right back,” Lena excuses herself after a minute alone with the pack of wolves and planning to drag Clara back into the fray with her. After only a minute of thinking, she finds herself outside of the men’s party with Clara peering in.

             “You want the booze.” The blonde tells it as a fact, knowing that she could sure as hell use some as well.

              Clara doesn’t even turn around at the sound of her voice. _‘Must be desperate’_ Lena thinks with an eyebrow raise. “Oh I want the booze,” Clara repeats determinedly as she shifts her weight. “Do you just want to walk in and grab it? Stay? Leave?” she suggests.

              “With how you’re apparently dressed we should just stay instead of wandering around being drunk,” she reminds her as Clara shivers wearing the knee-length robe.

              “Yeah I guess so,” Clara mutters back. “We have to do it now or go back before Dís comes looking for us and then we’re stuck there.”

              “Let’s do it,” Lena claps her hands, pushing the cracked door open with her foot and practically basking in the stares that surround them. “Hello bitches! We’re here to steal your booze and get really drunk!” she projects with a smile. Eyes are wide, the chatter stops, and nearly everyone looks Clara up and down.

              “What in Mahal’s name are you wearing woman?” Nori nods to Clara’s legs and she shrugs as if to say ‘What do you want me to do? Take it off instead?’.

               Fili’s eyebrows raise both at Lena’s words and at their dramatic entrance. “You’re both not allowed to be here tonight,” Fili criticizes expectantly and Clara scoffs.

               “You should be off with mother and the rest of the ladies,” Kili joins him in his effort, trying to make them leave the boys night alone.

               “First off Dís thought this,” she gestures to the robe, “would keep me from leaving the room, but she doesn’t know I’ve worn much less out in public! Secondly, I will stay here. We both will be staying because Lena is already drinking,” she points to the blonde who’s silently migrated to the back of the room and is proceeding to drink, no, chug, nearly an entire stein of Nori’s ‘special’ brew right out of the flask.

                Clara takes the silent attention shift to down a shot of whatever is in the nearest glass before settling herself next to Thorin on the couch.

               “Everyone knows when we drink, bad things happen so we’d be safer here than sewing with the oh so refined ladies of Erebor,” Lena drawls out. “We might end up stabbing ourselves with the needles or maybe stabbing someone else,” she mutters. Clara spots Thorin’s mug and while he’s still shocked at their intrusion, she takes a long swig of the bitter ale before it’s playfully taken from her hands by her black-haired knight in shining armor.

                Nori, Bofur, Bombur, Gloin, and everyone from the company is there! Even Bilbo is hanging out with them while Lena and Clara get the tightly corseted ladies in a sewing circle with not a drop of booze in sight! The women nearly fainted when they saw that much leg! Bunch of prudes she had said, leading to even more scandal amongst the hens.

               “If only to save everyone else from mass murder, then your presence would be most welcome,” Fili smirks, pulling Lena onto his lap and a drink is placed into both of the girl’s hands. _‘Let the party begin!’_ Lena anticipates gleefully.

                A few hours later everyone is laughing so hard tears are streaming down their eyes. Stories are coming out about Thorin that the two had never even dreamed of!

               “And so there he is, bare as a babe, standing in the middle of the street with a pint in his hand!” Raucous laughter echoes through the room as Thorin blushes dark red behind his cup and Clara slaps her leg and laughs along with the rest of the group as Lena’s red face has tears streaming down it.

               “I didn’t know you were so-so-uh, crazy!” Clara chortles through the drunken haze before giving Thorin red cheek a gentle kiss.

               “Clara we should get going,” Lena suggests after everyone quiets down. It’s nearly two in the morning, and while the rest of the men have their eyes wide open, Lena and Clara’s are beginning to droop.

               “You don’t need to stay with us,” Thorin whispers lowly into her ear, startling her awake a little bit as she begins to shift further into his side.

                She closes her eyes dreamily before whispering back, “We’re gonna be married today. I don’t think I’ll be able to fall asleep anyways.” Thorin smiles as his eyes are a little unfocused from all the alcohol.

               “Go to sleep,” he mutters. “You’ll be glad you did by tonight.” A final kiss is placed on her cheek before she starts to move toward the door.

               “Lena?” she calls uncertainly. Lena nods her head, standing from her place on Fili’s lap and giving him a full kiss, then joins Clara at the door.

               Both women use their bodyguard's arms to help them back into their rooms, the two burly dwarfs chuckling under their breath before giving rare full smiles at the state of the two women.

              “Can you be my guard even after the assassins ‘re found?” Lena asks Harfur as they move slowly to Lena’s room. “It’s just that you’re really nice and even though some bad stuff still happens I think of you as a friend, ya’ know?” she slurs slightly. “You’re really nice.”

               “I think of you as a friend as well Lena,” Harfur responds after a moment, feeling his heart swell at the gesture. “Whether I can stay as your guard isn’t up to me, but rather is the captain’s choice and the King’s. You understand?” Lena nods her head, looking a little sad at hearing that news, but even in her hazy state, she understands what he means. “I think that you’re nice as well lass,” he assures her gently, causing her smile to beam through her slightly depressed mood.

                Clara refuses to go into her room and so here she stands, shifting slightly before the thick wood and Jorah waiting patiently instead of shooing her away. “Jorah?” She says his name so softly if he hadn’t seen her lips move, he wouldn’t have known she had said anything.

               “Aye lass?”

               “Can I tell you a secret?” That phrase puts him slightly on edge but at this point, he doesn’t want her standing here when Thorin retires from the party. He weighs his options before nodding his head, consenting. “I don’t know what I’m doing,” she whispers again, shocking the older dwarf since this is not what he thought she would express.

               “And what made you think of that now?” he wonders with a slight smirk on his face.

                She huffs a breath that exits her nose in a rush before shaking her head. “I basically take care of animals and make stuff up when it’s anything else. It’s like my mom say, ‘fake it ‘till you make it’, but I feel like something’s gonna happen and I’m not sure what I’m gonna do about it! There’s a problem that’s too big for me but I have to fix it,” she frets quietly. _‘Cryptic’_ he thinks as he tries to wrap his head around this new development. For how hard Clara tries to be strong, she really isn’t. He’s glad he finally got to see her like this, human, fallible.

               “I know that whatever you do, you’ll have those telling you it’s not right but I’ve learned what’s best comes from your gut, not from any spoken voice.” It sounds equally cryptic to Clara, but she thinks she gets it.

                Her eyes light up, knowing exactly what he means now. “Thanks.” With that one word, Jorah knows that’s all it will ever take to get through to her, listening and a few words here and there, nothing too complex but something few people are willing to do. So, he responds with his classic bow and lets his charge head to sleep before becoming ready to become his queen before the next night comes.


End file.
